I get myself ready for the Carnival today, Taehyung doesn't know that we're going. But I'm excited that he'd be coming with me. I really want to make everything up to him. I wasn't the nicest to him that day I went over to his house, so, maybe this will make him feel better and stuff like that. I saved up my allowance and I plan on winning him a stuffed animal since I know he likes stuffed animals.

I'm wearing a long sleeved checkered shirt with shorts along with a light washed jean jacket over it. I had straightened my hair and curled the ends a bit with the straightener. I apply a small amount of makeup, mascara, eyeliner, some lip tint, eyebrow gel and a small amount of blush. I spray on my favorite perfume and grab my purse before I run downstairs and greet my mother who is sitting at the table playing scrabble with Jungkook's mother.

"Hi Auntie, Where is Jungkookie?" I ask her. "Oh, he just left a few minutes ago, he's going out." She says as she puts down letters on the board. "That doesn't count as a word." My mother whines. "Oh yes it does, 'sarcastically' is a word.", "You spelt it 'incorrectly'." My mother laughs as she sets down the word that went through my aunties word. "Aye!" She exclaims. My mother just laughs. She finally looks at me. "You look adorable honey." She says. "Oh yes, she does. Do you have more gin? And peanuts?" I let out a breath.

"Goodbye Eomma." I say to her. "Oh bye honey. Yes yes, let me go and get it." She stands up and walks past me into the kitchen, not even giving me a goodbye kiss or hug. I watch my auntie look at her new tiles, trying to think of another word. "You can get phenomenal if you overlap my mother's 'happy' and 'bread'." I tell her before walking out of the door. "Ya!!! That's cheating Jennie!" I hear my mother before I close the door. I smile to myself and walk off my porch.

I walk down to the sidewalk and I see Jungkook in the distance. I know it's him because of the back of his head. His mother must have came over after he left. I slowly follow him, but I keep my distance from him. Then I notice him walk up to another house and a boy opens the door, I'm really confused. Then seeing the house I remember that it's that dogs house. I roll my eyes and turn quickly, nearly bumping into Taehyung.

"What are you doing?" He asks me. "Nothing." I say, I look at what he's wearing. Oh! He looks so hot! He's wearing a darker blue jean jacket, black jeans and a white shirt. "You were following Jungkook?" He asks me the obvious. "Yeah, I just wanted to know where he was going. Just to make sure that he was okay." I lie. He raises an eyebrow. "So, where are we going on your date today?" He grins wide,quickly changing the subject off of Jungkook. "Oh!" I smile and take his hand in the direction of the train station.

"Somewhere really fun." I tell him. "Oh? Fun? I live for the word fun." He smiles. I smile wide, "You're so cute." I grip tighter on his hand. He stops in his spot on the sidewalk and I'm almost yanked back. He wraps his arms around me and I wrap my arms around his neck. "I'm excited about the carnival." He whispers. "Me too." I answer to him. He then kisses my nose before I lift my head and connect our lips.

We kissed for a few seconds before we pulled away. He has the biggest smile on his face. My cheeks heat up and I lightly push his shoulder in a flirty way. He chuckles and kisses my lips again before he stands up straight and takes my hand, leading me in the direction we were originally going in. I look up at the sky and smile. I walk closer to him and hug his bicep, setting my head on his shoulder.

When we get to the train station, he offers to pay for my ticket. "If you insist." I whisper to him. He gladly pays for them. When we're heading to the waiting area, I feel this tingle in the back of my neck. I turn and look, Jungkook and the dog. Along with that guy. My blood then boils, he's taking her to the carnival!? The carnival that only us two have gone since we were kids?

Ugh, he has no right to take her where we made our memories. "Jennie?" I hear next to me. "Ah?" I quickly turn and look at him. "You're very distracted lately." He says. "Oh yeah, sorry. I thought I had mm.. dropped my lip tint.", I swiftly pull it out of my purse without him seeing me do it. "See?" I pick it up and he just nods. We sit at the back of the waiting area.

"Jennie.." He whispers. I look at him. "You still think of Jungkook, don't you?" He asks. My jaw clenches and my heart picks up speed. "I just wonder what he's up to, that's all." He stares at me, "I just want you to know that I'm okay with you wanting to be his friend again. I know he means a lot to you, and I just want you to be happy with me.. knowing that I trust you." I slowly smile.

"Thanks Taehyung. But I don't think that being friends with Jungkook is the right thing right now, I want to just fix us, I want us to get closer with no problems.", "Jennie, every relationship has their problems. It's the way you resolve it.. that's what makes they closer and stronger." I then start to wonder if Jungkook and the dog have any problems. "You're right." I smile.

He hugs me and I turn my head to the side to see Jungkook and Lalisa sitting in the front, Jungkook is looking at the boy they had arrived with. I slowly smile. He's their problem. What if he's the result of their breakup? That would be a dream come true. I wouldn't want my Jungkook to be held down by some mutt. She doesn't belong with him. Like how pickles should never be deep fried or.. fish with cheese.

Taehyung then let's go of me and I look at him. "I like making new memories with you." He whispers. "I do too." I agree. I then hear the name of our train being announced. "Okay, let's go." He takes my hand, I keep a close eye on Jungkook and the dog. They're definitely going to the same place as us. I know for a fact that Jungkook doesn't know any other thing out far from Busan besides Seoul.

And the only thing in Seoul this time of year is that carnival. UGH!!! I hate that he's doing this!!

**

As we walk to the train, I know that she's watching Jungkook. I'm not dumb. They're clearly going to the carnival as well. It just makes me irritated when Jennie doesn't tell me straight up. Yeah, she said it a few times that she's confused. And she hasn't physically said "I don't love you Taehyung, I love Jungkook." I guess that's why I still have hope.

I hope that she would love me and kiss me... hold me and want me. But I guess that it's too much to ask for. But! I will still try, I will win Jennie's heart and she will love me and want me.. she'll hug me during the cold nights and kiss me every chance she gets. I'm just a needy person, a person who never got love from his parents and wants it now from the girl of his dreams.

When we get to the train I purposely pull her to another cart so that we're not in the same one as him. She takes the window seat and I take the aisle seat. "So tell me, what are we going to do when we get there?" I try to put her attention on me, on us. "Oh, whatever you'd like." She smiles. "What is there to do?" I ask her. She sits back and stares at me as she taps her finger on her chin.

"Rides and games, I haven't gone in years.. but last I heard they recently started selling American foods such as deep fried foods." She tells me. "Are you hungry." I ask her. "Mmm, are you?" She asks. I chuckle, "I asked you first." She grins, "A little." She finally says. "Okay, do you want to go on the rides first then eat?" She brings her legs onto the seat at an angle, then grabs my hand. "I just feel snacky-ish.. so we can eat after the rides."

I nod, "Okay, for sure. No worries, I just want to try the booth food." She looks at me surprised, "Have you ever been to a carnival?" I shake my head and she gasps. "No! You've had to have gone when you were little." She says. I shake my head, She then frowns. "My parents were always too busy, like they are now. And plus, I was too much of a burden on them to ever be taken out to do fun things." I let out a breath and think about all the things I missed out on as a kid.

"They'd make my nanny at the time, always take me out. But I hated it because I didn't want some old lady to take me out and treat me like her kid. I wanted my parents to take me out and care for me like I'm a human." I look down at her little hands holding mine. "Sometimes I believe that I was never supposed to be born." I whisper. "Don't say that Taehyung." She whispers. "It's true, my mother had to take time off from work because of me and she almost lost her position. She even told me herself that if she was able to just have me and have a nanny take care of me, she would have."

Wow, really sucks saying out loud. Not even my mother wanted to take care of me when she was given her time with me when I was born. "That's horrible." I look at her in the eyes, "I don't belong anywhere Jennie.. I wasn't supposed to be here." She shakes her head viciously and leans forward, "Don't say that Taehyung, that's a lie." She says to me. I just let out a breath and lay my head against the seat.

"Nobody ever wanted me." I sit back and say nothing, "I'm sorry I ruined today, and it just started. I'm such a waste." I feel her soft warm hands grab my face, "Don't say that Taehyung." She says in an angry voice as she makes me look at her. "But you don't want me." Slips out. "What do you mean I don't want you?" Her eyebrows knit. I just stare at her and say nothing more.

She just gently lets go of my face and sits back, I also sit back and look forward at the head in front of me. I stare at the hair of the man who slept soundly, he's possibly going home or something. His hair flops up as he readjusts in his seat. I would be someone who stares at someone's head. I just look down at my phone and a picture of Jennie and I is on the lock screen. I stare at it for a long time until the picture slowly fades into darkness and my phone is turned off.

I slowly let my hand fall to my lap and I just stare at my knee. My bony knee. I let out a breath and turn to Jennie, only to meet her eyes. She was staring at me. I clench my jaw. She leans forward and her face is close to mine. I look deep into her eyes. Her nostrils flare once, before she touches my face and she presses her lips against mine. Her small fingers extend along my jaw. I shut my eyes, hoping. Her lips part and she lets out a breath, if this is to manipulate me... it's working.

I slowly open my eyes and look at her closed ones, only to have her connect our lips again and my eyes shut closed. My heart pounding in my chest as I feel like I'm going to explode with happiness that I can have a girl like Jennie. She can make my heart bust at any minute. She slowly pulls away and before I can open my eyes and look at her beautiful face, she lays her head on my chest. Her left hand on my shoulder, then it slowly runs over to my neck before she uses her fingers to play with my hair.

I don't know what this means, maybe she's just.. I literally don't know. I'm at a roadblock with her. She's confusing but I don't know why I'm so addicted to her. Like there's this force and spell that over takes me when I'm around her. Most of the time I follow it because I know I love her for reals. In my heart I know it's her.

My eyes become heavy and I find myself falling asleep. Remembering all the things that would happen when I was little.. such as always being left at home by myself. My nanny taking me out to do things and me hating it because everyone knew that my parents had work and couldn't take me out themselves. I got teased at school because people said that my parents didn't love me and care for me, and I believed them. And I still believe them.

My parents are just those types of people that aren't meant to have children. "Taehyung." I hear. "I'm sorry Eomma, I'm sorry that I'm a burden." I whisper. "I'm sorry that I was born and you didn't want me." I whisper, almost bursting into tears. "Taehyung." I open my eyes. Jennie's face is in front of mine. "We're here." She says. "Okay." I say, standing up and waiting for her for get up as well. "Taehyung.." She whispers. "I thought we were here." I tell her.

I know I was whispering in my sleep, and that she heard. That is obvious in the way that she's looking at me in this moment. But I don't want to talk about it. I've talked about it enough. I've expressed the way I feel and I don't want her to think I'm weak. Though she's seen me in that position several times because of her. I just want us to have a good time today and I'm ruining the moment very quickly and we haven't even made it to the damn carnival.

"We are.. it's just that-", "Let's go then, we wouldn't want to get stuck on the train going back." I tell her. Her lips slowly close and she gets up from her seat so we can leave the train. We are the last ones to leave the cart and she grabs my hand and leads me in the direction of the carnival. "I'm excited." I break the silence. "I'm happy that you're excited." She looks at me and smiles. And I pray that she can forget about what happened on the train.

It's not important. I'm not important.

Come on Taehyung, stop thinking about yourself. Who cares about what you feel? No one cares. It took us a block to get to the carnival, it was packed. I see the rides and all the booths, I then see Jungkook at the booth buying tickets. I clench my jaw and pull Jennie in the opposite direction of him, she looks at me confused. "What's wrong?" She asks. "Let's take pictures together so I can remember this day forever." She smiles.

"Okay." She says. I instantly pull out my phone and turn on the front camera, "Now that's just not fair." I look at her. "How come you look all perfect when you open the front camera? I look like a potato." She whines. I chuckle and wrap my arm around her shoulder. "No, don't say that. If you're a potato I'm a potato." She looks up at me and I look down at her. I pull my phone up and take a picture. She looks at the phone and I keep staring at her as I take another picture.

She smiles and takes the phone from my hand, and I take the opportunity to hug her from behind while I bury my face in her neck. A lot of the young people walking by are staring at us. "We got cute pictures." She tells me. I smile and kiss her cheek before she hands me my phone back. "Which ride first?" She asks me. I look at the choices. "You choose." Then I see Jungkook in line for a ride, and I instantly don't want to go to that one.

"How about the one that spins really fast?" I tell her. "Okay." She smiles. Every single time we got off a ride, I make sure not to pick one that he was at. I want to keep him out of her sight as much as possible. I really don't need him seeing her, but most importantly.. her seeing him. Who knows what she'll do. I don't need them ruining each others evenings. Or more like, I don't need to see his face.

We got on all the rides up until Jennie said, "I feel hungry now.", "Me too, let's go then." And she grabs my hand, leading me to the food area.

**

Though I really shouldn't be, I've been looking for Jungkook the whole time we've been here. Taehyung has been pulling me place to place and I really haven't had a second to look at my surroundings. I strongly believe that he doesn't want me to see Jungkook, after all I am here with him and not Jungkook. Plus, tonight means a lot to Taehyung, so I will be considerate of his feelings though he hasn't told me how he feels about me and Jungkook.

I look at him when we make it to the food area, his face lighting up as he sees the snacks and plates of foods. "What do you want to eat?" I ask him. "Oh, I don't know. There's so much to choose from." He says his eyes fill with joy and wonder. I smile and pull him to the sweets. "Ooooo!!" He exclaims as he sees people making funnel cakes. "One for five dollars." The person tells us. "You want one?" I ask him. "Oh yes, that looks really good."

His eyes lighten up as he watches the batter get overlapped and lines of it went everywhere. The lady lets it get a golden brown before she takes it off and sets it on a plate. "What would you like on it? I usually put powdered sugar, whipped cream, strawberries and chocolate syrup.", "All of it." Taehyung says simply. "Okay." The lady replies, as she starts to pile on the ingredients.

Taehyung instantly takes out the right amount of money and hands it to her when she's done with making toppings. She gives us two forks and some napkins. "Thank you." Taehyung and I tell her as we leave the booth. He leads the way to a table and we sit down. "This looks so good, I don't know where to start." He says. I smile at him. "Where ever you want." I tell him. He starts from the corner where there is a lot of powdered sugar.

Every time we ate more and more of the very unhealthy food, he kept saying, "This is good, this is so good." At one point I just watched him eat it, seeing how unbelievably happy he was. Which I found so cute and sad at the same time. From how many times I've come to the carnival, not even my first time eating funnel cake did I react this way. "This was the best." He said as the whole thing was gone. "Do you want something else?" I ask him.

"No, I think that was good. Why don't we go and play some games?" He asks as he stands up with the trash and I get up as well. We head over to the booths and buy more tickets. When I turn my head I see Jungkook and Lalisa playing around near a booth. She's on his back and he ends up pulling her off and she yells his name, people passing by as they smile. I shake my head and when Taehyung has the tickets I grab his hand and go in the opposite of them.

She's so annoying! She doesn't need to make everything about them. Why were people even smiling!? They're not cute at all.

"Taehyung, I wanted to win you something." I tell him. He smiles, "The boy is supposed to do that for the girl." I grin and take two of my tickets and walk over to a booth, only to have him follow me. "Let me hold your purse." He suggests. I hand it over and he waits for me to pick the booth. I play one of those games where you have to get the ring around the top of the milk bottle. I've always been good at this game. I give the woman that was running the booth two tickets and she hands me the small rings.

I take in a deep breath before I grab a ring and toss it towards the bottles. It instantly hooks around the bottle. One by one I throw the rings and four out of five make it. "Here you go." She hands me a bear that wasn't too big. It was dark brown and it was pretty plain. I bow to her, "Thank you." I smile before turning around and seeing a huge smile on Taehyung's face. I extend my arms and show him the bear. "For you." I do aegyo. He chuckles and pulls my wrist gently.

My body is against his and I look up at him as I hug the bear. "Thank you." He whispers. I quickly nod. He presses his lips against my head and I feel his fingers curl over my hand. His hands are so big, I love when we hold hands. He pulls away and I give him the bear. "He's cute." He says looking down at the bear that looks a little small in his hands. "Let me win you a bigger one I-", "I like this one though." I look at him as I blink several times.

"Okay." He nods. We play more booth games and he got me a cute cat plushie. "Will it get along with your unicorn?" He asks. I laugh. "I hope so." He smiles. We didn't play that many games and ended up going back to the food cause Taehyung wanted to try one more thing before we left. While we're in line, something catches my eye. I turn my head and see Jungkook and that dog leaving the carnival.

I shrug and turn to Taehyung who is ordering these deep fried treats. My eyes widen at the Oreos being made. "Wow, I want to try that." I tell him. "I got us each two." He says and we wait on the side of the booth for the food to get finished baking. "I had a lot of fun with you today Jennie." He tells me. I nod my head as I hug him and he wraps an arm around me. "This is what we needed." I tell him as I set my chin on his chest.

"I think so too." He nods. He grins and pulls my hair out of my face and behind my ear before the man running the stand tells us the Oreos are ready. "Thank you." Taehyung and I tell him as we start to leave the carnival. "What do you think it will be? A ten out of ten awesome?" I ask him. He gazes down at it on his plate. "Oh, I don't know. It looks promising. But you know, everything that looks nice visually doesn't mean that it's going to be good tasting."

And I stare out into space, like what he just said had a deeper meaning. "Let's try it together." My thoughts are instantly canceled out and I smile at him. "Okay." We stop on the sidewalk near a trash can and I grab one from the plate in his hand that had four of the Oreos on it. "Ready?" He asks. I nod quickly, looking down at it. "One." I prep myself. "Two." I look at him, "Are we biting in three or after three?" He laughs.

"One, two, then bite.", "Okay." We prepare ourselves one last time and I wait for his count. "One, two, three." We take a bite, the the bread around the Oreo was soft and the cookie inside had melted along with the filling. "Mmmmm!!!" I explain with how good it is. He nods quickly in agreement. "Taehyung, this is the best.", "I think better than the funnel cake." He says.

"Though the funnel cake had more toppings, I think just the powder on top of this is enough.", "I agree." I say covering my mouth with my hand as I talk. We eat the rest of them and he throws the plate away. "Ready to go home?" He asks. I grab his hand and nod, "Okay." He smiles.

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