WHAT CAN I DO
CHAPTER FORTY SEVEN
❝WHAT AM I TO YOU, DO YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT ME. YOU'RE DIFFERENT EVERY TIME I SEE YOU, I CAN'T FIGURE IT OUT. YOU'RE MAKING TIME FOR EVERYBODY ELSE, BUT YOU DON'T HAVE ANY TIME FOR ME. THIS IS UNFAIR, WHY YOU GOTTA BE MAKING ME IMPATIENT.❞

♔♔♔

      Reyna watched Theo with careful eyes, she watched their interaction, she observed them as if she was a prey watching her enemies. But he was no enemy, no, Theo Hartens is far from being the enemy. But for her well being and her happiness, he might as well be. And perhaps she's being dramatic for thinking of him in such a way, but it's true. Everything she does, everything she says, it's all influenced by him.

      When has she allowed herself to become so weak in the knees? To forget the morals she was raised upon and push them all away for a single person. How did this happen? Why did it happen? When has she allowed a boy to dictate her life? No, it would be selfish if Reyna blamed her change because of Theo. He hasn't changed, but she has. He was still oblivious to it all, and though she preferred to keep it that way, she couldn't help but wonder what would happen if she just told him.

      But now she's glad she hasn't. Because looking at him now, seeing him so happy and full of life despite the animosity around them, it made Reyna happy to see him alive and well. And that was all she ever wanted for her friend, to ensure that his happiness was still in tact even after everything that's happen. And Reyna will swear against that happiness even at the cost of her own.

      Theo noticed his best friend and fellow leader from the corner. He smiled and called out her name, snapping her out of her trance, before he beckoned her over with his hand ushering her to come forth. Reyna forced a small smile on her face as she approached him.

      It was almost like she was approaching her own death. With every step she felt her lungs slowly suffocate, she felt like she was drowning as she walked towards him with heavy steps. The leader of the army doubt that it was because of her asthma, she has been working to overcome it and so far it has helped. But when she's around him she couldn't help but blame it on her asthma rather than admit that it was because she's in such pain.

      One step.

      He's not yours, her mind hisses viciously at her.

      Another step.

      Don't let him know you're upset, her subconscious warns her.

      You're getting closer.

      You were never his in the first place, she finalized.

      You're here.

      Maybe this was meant to happen. Maybe you're not supposed to always walk into your happiness or get that happy ending you deserve. Because maybe your happy ending isn't what you want it to be. I mean, think about it this way, do we always get what we want? No, so how is this time any different? You're not meant to get the happy ending you dreamed of, no one's supposed to. Because that's not realistic. Your happy ending can't possibly be your ideal ending, not when you can't notice the flaws because you're so blinded by what you want to see.

      Happy endings are given to you and maybe not in the form we want it to be. And that's the reality of it, we get endings we're not happy with and we wonder why.

      Because this happy ending is better for us. We may not know it now, but we will one day.

      Reyna's happy ending wasn't supposed to be the form of Theo, it never was supposed to be. Her happy ending is now placed in Theo's happiness and well being. Because he's finally happy, and that's all she could ever want for him.

      "Rey, I want you to meet Carter Arrowood, my girlfriend."

      "It's nice to meet you, Carter."

♔♔♔

twitter

@username1: softtofu omg the newest chapter sucks! bring back #reo!
139 likes | 200 retweets

|

@username2: lmao softtofu is totally just getting worse and she made her book even more terrible by bringing carter
87 likes | 91 retweets

|

@username3: softtofu PLEASE DON'T BREAK UP REO OMG 😭
30 likes | 4 retweets

|

@username4: i refuse to read this book if reo isn't endgame goodbye 👋
13 likes | 2 retweets

|

@misskelseyeast: if you're not satisfied with the book you don't have to read it okay? don't send shit to tofu because you don't like how the book is turning out, not your decision and never will be #reo
340 likes | 423 retweets

|

@username5: obviously this book won't end with reo so i'm ending this book goodbye
21 likes | 1 retweet

|

@fdimensions1996: i personally loved the chapter. don't know why you are all hating bc you're clearly not the artist so you don't know shit
99 likes | 86 retweets

@softtofu liked your tweet !

♔♔♔

twitter
private messages

softtofu:
they hate it
delivered 1:03 AM

fdimensions1996:
fuck what they think
delivered 1:03 AM

fdimensions1996:
it was a bloody brilliant chapter okay so they can go fuck themselves
delivered 1:03 AM

softtofu:
bloody?
delivered 1:04 AM

fdimensions1996:
sorry i was watching a few british tv shows with my friends
delivered 1:04 AM

softtofu:
ahhh i see
delivered 1:04 AM

softtofu:
what did you think of the update?
delivered 1:04 AM

fdimensions1996:
amazing as always
delivered 1:05 AM

fdimensions1996:
your art and writing never fails to impress me
delivered 1:05 AM

fdimensions1996:
honestly you could be a poet or writer if you wanted to be
delivered 1:05 AM

softtofu:
nah i still have to finish up with school
delivered 1:06 AM

softtofu:
but thank you theo
delivered 1:06 AM

fdimensions1996:
anytime reyna
delivered 1:06 AM

fdimensions1996:
can i ask you a question though?
delivered 1:06 AM

softtofu:
go for it
delivered 1:06 AM

fdimensions1996:
why do you still talk to me? i'm sure you get lots of readers messaging you
delivered 1:07 AM

fdimensions1996:
i obviously don't mind, i love talking to you. but why do you talk to me? i talk to you because your writing is amazing and because you're an artist / author that i admire
delivered 1:07 AM

fdimensions1996:
but why do you still talk to me?
delivered 1:07 AM

softtofu:
because you make me feel good about myself
delivered 1:08 AM

softtofu:
talking to you makes me feel like i'm actually important
delivered 1:08 AM

softtofu:
believe it or not i'm not exactly going through an easy time in my life right now
delivered 1:08 AM

fdimensions1996:
what about the people around you?
delivered 1:09 AM

softtofu:
they're busy with their own stuff, but i don't blame them
delivered 1:09 AM

fdimensions1996:
oh i'm sorry to hear that reyna
delivered 1:09 AM

fdimensions1996:
one more question and i swear i will let you sleep since i know it's late in london where you are
delivered 1:09 AM

softtofu:
hit me with it
delivered 1:10 AM

fdimensions1996:
why did you give theo a girlfriend?
delivered 1:10 AM

softtofu:
because theo needs someone other than reyna, because he can't depend on her and she can't help him or give him what he needs. so theo needs happiness and though it's cheesy his happiness is in the form of carter
delivered 1:11 AM

fdimensions1996:
you're wrong you know
delivered 1:12 AM

fdimensions1996:
theo will always need reyna
delivered 1:12 AM

♔♔♔

A/N;

It's currently two past half in the morning as I am finishing this up. I have a quiz I didn't study for in approximately ten hours. My wifi is still down so I'm currently using my phone's hot spot to type this all up. But hopefully this will turn out okay?

God I am so tired.

Okay, dedicated to semiofsummer! Thank you for the support love!

Much Love Guys.

( written: september 6, 2017 )
( published: september 7, 2017 )