09
m e m o r i e s

I GET UP from Noah's shoulder when my eyelids start getting heavy. Rubbing my eyes, I turn and look at him, who's sleeping with his head down.

Right, he hasn't been sleeping for almost two days; he should sleep after his night shift, but he chose to come with me.

I carefully shift myself a bit away from him, just a bit. My eyes land on his profile, and I can feel the urge of helping him lay down on the floor again—sleeping upright is certainly not comfortable. But my hands stay still, my eyes stay still. He's like a giant sun, attracting me with its gravitational pull.

Bits of sunlight gradually slip away as the sky turns into a canvas of blue and pastel purple. How did all of these happen? Somehow I just got to hop onto a car with a stranger and have the privilege to see the most astounding view in my life.

I look at the person next to me again. And I realize that when I'm with him, I don't feel like Riley Ran anymore. Riley Ran worries about being drugged when someone offers a croissant, she doesn't want to trust a person in only a few hours, she doesn't want to reveal who she really is to a person.

But when I start thinking about how little time we have left, I know that maybe the part of me that would resist had finally been liberated. Maybe I had already learnt how to accept things the moment I saw him.

As if something has slightly triggered him, Noah's eyelashes flutter open. He stretches his body.

"How long has it been?" he asks, his voice still pliant with sleep.

I shrug. "I'm not sure, but the night is coming."

He blinks at me, his eyes lazy and sexy. I can feel us kissing. I can feel his touch all over me, his lips all over me. We're still on top of a large rock, and the place is almost deserted. But I don't care about anything.

As though my thoughts are being transported to him, he gives me a knowing smile. He knows what I'm thinking.

He inches closer to me, and I can hear the energy between us ebb and flow like the tide. The sound of heartbeats, breaths, wind. Everything around me becomes a distant whisper.

I'm just a girl. He's just a guy. Everything will be back to normal tomorrow.

After a few seconds of staring, Noah clears his throat, and it brings me back to reality.

We pull our gazes away swiftly. I start fumbling with the strands of hair in front of me.

What on earth just happened?

I peek at Noah again. He's fidgeting as he stares at the sinking sun.

"We... is there a restaurant nearby? You know, dinner." I push the voice out of my throat.

"I'll check," he answers and takes his phone out. After a few moments of waiting, he shows me his phone. "There's a diner in a town called Redwood, fifteen-minute drive from here."

I nod. "Okay. So... we should probably get going?"

"Yeah, yeah." He puts his phone away and nods. "Right, let's go," he says, cheerfully, and gets up on his feet.

I follow him down the stairs, and we walk along the trails again. I've been staring at the landscape for hours now, but I never get weary of it—it's that beautiful, which makes me wonder why I still haven't taken a photo of it.

"Hey." I nudge Noah. "Can you help me to take a photo?"

"I did," he says, smirking.

I smile and roll my eyes, knowing that he's referring to the photo he snapped before Lana showed up.

"I want a real one," I answer and hand him my phone.

"Any photo is a real photo, any frozen moment that the camera captures has happened in real life," he says as he looks at my phone.

I sigh dramatically. "You're really not a fan of photos."

"Well, because when you look at a photo afterwards, the photo will gradually become
the only memory you have left, but the fact is that there's so much more than the moment you took the picture. So why not just enjoy what we're experiencing now?" Noah shrugs.

I knit my eyebrows together and narrow my eyes. "I honestly don't understand you this time. I guess you just are not a fan of taking pictures," I say and tilt my head.

Letting out a chuckle, he takes my phone and swipes to the camera. He turns around, his back facing the gorgeous view, and snaps a selfie with me.

"Here you go." He hands me back my phone.

I actually wanted a photo that only includes me, but I'm certainly satisfied with what I have now.

I grin at Noah. "Thank you."

"It's fine." He shrugs and smiles.

"So, why do you bring your camera around if you don't like taking photos?" I ask the question again, remembering the first time I asked a few hours ago.

"Some things still deserve to be recorded, I think. You just know that you want to record it. I don't really have a reason for that, honestly, maybe things that I can't possibly see again?" he answers.

My heart stops. He snapped a photo of me, so am I a person that he can't possibly see again?

"Oh." My voice sounds shallow, it sounds like it doesn't belong to me.

"Riley?" He asks as he notices that I zone out.

"Yeah?" I look up at him. "Never mind, I— we should go, I'm hungry."

His words linger in my mind. But it's true, I knew that after today, we won't be who we are today. We'll be returning to our lives, him doing his jobs, me studying in NYU.

The only thing I know is that we're free today—without pressure, without the burden of anything, but with the company of each other and the Grand Canyon.

And when the cover of darkness has finally sneaked in, with the last remaining amber under the sheet of dark blue, we reach the same place we first arrived this afternoon.

I remember the feeling when I first came here—the same exact spot—I was full of hope, I was exhilarated, for I could finally see the Grand Canyon.

And now that our trip has ended, I feel empty, as if something is missing. But I'll be lying if I say that I'm not accomplished.

"Thank you, Noah," I say as I turn to him. "I'll never forget today."

He returns me a smile, as if telling me that he won't forget today too.