T W O | deal with the devil—

C A P R I C E

Sometimes all I wanted to do was forget. Memories I longed to bury were becoming persistent, turning into painful, repeated nightmares. Feelings of melancholy surged up in me and I would wake up in cold sweat.

It drove me nuts so I came down and ate some strawberry ice cream. An hour later, I realized it was a bad idea. Sleep had completely forsaken me.

And being awake equaled to thoughts clanging loud in my head.

Marriage didn't even cross my mind until yesterday. Relationships in my world were nothing but a show, a display of supremacy. I knew because I dated heirs of haciendas and successors of empires. Only one man had my affection but he was the black sheep of the family. So that wasn't counted. In the end, I had accepted that love wasn't for me and that my marriage would be nothing but a piece of paper.

But I couldn't stop the tears.

"Caprice?"

My head snapped upwards to see Indy leaning against the entrance to the kitchen. Shame rushed in me that I wiped my tears in haste. "Did you bust up my security?"

"I wish. But that'll reflect badly on me." Indy dragged a chair and sat in front of me. He bent forward, reaching out to stroke my cheek that was still moist from the tears. "Who is it?"

My lips parted to answer but a choking sound was heard instead. I cursed myself and took a deep breath until the tightness in my chest vanished. "I'm okay."

Indy nodded though his eyes held suspicions. "I'm sorry about yesterday. You know how my brain works."

"You have one?"

"Very funny." He got up and opened the cupboards to find a box of tissues. He snatched one and began drying the remnants of my waterworks. "What happened?"

I sniffled and took the tissue from him. I was certain my eyes would be swollen the next day but thank god there's concealer. "You don't have to say sorry. You were right."

"I'm right?" he echoed, looking dumbfounded. "I don't hear that every day."

I let out a wan smile. "I'm getting married."

"What! With who?" His eyes widened in shock.

"Alvarez or something..." I shook my head, crushing the used tissue in my fist. "I wasn't thinking. My mind went blank."

"So that's okay with you?" Indy's voice elevated.

"Is that bad?"

"Priz! You were crying por el amor de Dios!" Indiana clicked his tongue in revulsion. "Don't you have limits at all?"

"I asked myself that every day, Indy." The edge of my eyes seared but I refused to bow down. "But I keep coming to the same answer. I love her. She's only the family I have! And I want her to love me too. I want her to be proud of me!"

"In exchange of losing yourself?" Indy's jaw clenched as he looked away. His eyebrows were puckered in deep thinking like there was an internal battle within him. "That's a stupid dream. It will never happen."

Resolve colored his eyes as he swiveled to face me. "So what if she cannot love you? There are a billion people in the world, Caprice. And if that doesn't work, I'm still here. I'll always love you."

Tears fell from my eyes again. I immediately put a hand up to hide it but sobs trickled out of me. "I know that."

"Go through this and you will be her slave forever. Think about it." I heard him sneer as the chair squeaked, a sign that he stood upright. "I'm going."

Indiana and I rarely fought. But when we do, it's because of my Abuela. Twice in two days. It was a new record for us. Damn it.

☽

The privileged ones had this unspoken rule to carry oneself with an air superiority. It should be seen in the way you move, in the way you talk, and in the way you dressed. Appearing too common would only make people disrespect you.

The rule was embedded in my skull since I was young. It hadn't been easy. I hated laces and heels and picking out the correct utensils. I scraped my knee and fell down when balancing books. Back then, online games were more important.

But I continued because I wanted Abuela to be proud of me.

Looking at my reflection in the mirror, I realized that nothing had changed. I chose an outfit that sparkled under the light. A make-up that accentuated my amber eyes. A grey choker to emphasize my slender neck. And diamond piercings to glitter my ears.

I chose an outfit that would get Abuela's approval.

I sighed and went to the car where Abuela had been sitting. She shot me a quick glance before peeking at her wristwatch.

Well, shit. I was probably one minute late.

"¡Perdon!" I muttered and sat next to her.

The ride to the restaurant was stone-cold. It had been for the past twenty years. And yet, I was still expecting a warm smile from her. I wanted to slap myself awake from this nightmare.

I wished I could be more like Indy. My best friend had no qualms in turning his back on his parents. He had wanted to grow up fast so he could command his own life. And he did. Aside from inheriting BLCK Security, he had established luxurious nightclubs and exclusive sports centers. He didn't need anyone after that. Why couldn't I do that?

A few minutes later, we arrived at a restaurant called Rica y grande. Rich people crammed the restaurant. The main reason was the gold ensemble that filled the place. It stayed true to its name that half of the items on the menu had gold dust sprinkled on it.

Sometimes, I questioned the things that go inside the human mind. Like seriously, why would you want to eat gold?

To poop gold?

Abuela sauntered towards our reserved table where a man in his early fifties was seated. The man was wearing a crisp suit with a white necktie. His face was pristine. Not one speck of dirt.

He must be Galahad Alvarez. When I stood beside the hag, his sharp eyes burned into me. He stared at me like he discovered a new species.

"And where is your son, Señor?" Abuela spoke. Her tone dripped with loathing.

The man motioned for us to sit. He beamed. "He couldn't come today but I assure you, Señora Rosaria, he wholeheartedly agreed to this marriage."

The chairman stared at the man with a doubtful gaze. I was hoping that she would shower him with uncouth words but my grandmother stayed quiet. How peculiar.

The dinner went on with constant compliments from Señor Alvarez. He dropped hints of a merger, offering investment contracts. He was a leech. Sucking what's good without giving anything in return. And I refused to believe that Abuela didn't see it. So what was it that she saw in him?

I tuned out most of their conversations and focused on my soup. It felt like paper on my tongue. My distress doubled seeing the gold flakes floating on it. Shit.

Cheers permeated the air as a couple in the main hall shared a kiss. I gave up in trying to eat and observed the blissful pair. The sparkling thing on her finger showed it was a proposal. But more than that, it was their eyes. The love glimmered more than diamonds ever could.

I would've wanted that.

Fuck it. I wanted that. What was stopping me?

"Caprice?"

"Yes?" My chest thumped and I dreaded her words.

"Do you agree? The marriage will happen next month."

The man's mouth began to form into a satisfied smile. "If it is okay with the señorita, I'm also in favor of the wedding to happen next month. Merging our family together will surely bring good luck."

I was silent for a whole minute that the two older people looked at each other in question.

"Caprice?" Grandmother's voice beckoned me to speak. Her face showed seriousness. My previous marriage proposals weren't like this. We couldn't even finish until dessert because the guy's family would fall short of Abuela's standards

"Caprice?" she repeated with a tinge of impatience.

I took a deep breath and stood up, making the chair screeched against the floor, metal to ceramics.

"I don't plan on marrying anyone," I stated firmly.

The hefty burden in my heart went lighter but one glance at Abuela's face and the heaviness set in. Her face was placid but her disapproval tugged at the corner of her lips. Her discontent was enough for me to sprint to the restroom.

I rested against the restroom door, placing a hand against my hammering heart. "Dios mío! What did you do, Caprice?" I was tempted to punch something, anything. I took several deep breaths, pacing the floor when the door burst open.

"That behavior was unacceptable, Caprice." Abuela's icy voice thundered inside the restroom. I was glad that nobody else was there. "What were you thinking?"

Her condemnation made me wince. I had never seen her this upset with me. But I couldn't take my words back. The deed was done. "I'm sorry I can't follow you anymore, Abuela."

"And why not?"

"Did you see that couple, Abuela?" I asked, gasping at the flood of determination that sparked in my skin. "I wanted that. I've always wanted that."

"You want love?" Skepticism was rich in her tone. "I didn't raise you like this Caprice."

"No!" My throat closed up but I spat the words I longed to say. "I'm thankful that you raised me, Abuela. I admire you so much. But I am not your servant!" I cried out, forcing back the wave of sadness that was trying to engulf me. I wasn't allowed to cry in front of her.

"Do you even know the reason why I follow your every order? It's because I love you, Abuela! But I see now that you won't ever return that love." I breathed hard. "Indy was right. It was a futile dream. A vana ilusíon."

My grandmother crossed her arms in response. Brandishing my feelings didn't even make her bat an eyelash. "Unbelievable. You want something temporary and fleeting? You have everything, Caprice. Money, power, fame. These things are the ones that matter. These things won't let people take advantage of you!"

"Enough!" I yelled that even Abuela frowned in revolt. I bit my lip, trying to appease my racing heartbeat. "I'm sorry I can't do it. I'm sorry if I failed you. I'm sorry if I disappointed you. I'm sorry if I can't be your perfect granddaughter anymore."

Despite my voice cracking, I continued to speak. "I'm sorry but we want different things, Abuela. I want to be happy. And being rich and beautiful... that's not enough for me."

Minutes ticked by as calm descended on us. I chewed my bottom lip, apprehension swarming over me. Maybe I should take my words back. But flicking a glance at my grandmother told me it was a horrid idea.

This was it. She was going to blast me off the family tree. I would forever rely on Indy's help.

Only the sliver of hope that Abuela cared for my wants a little bit gave me the strength not to crumple on the ground.

"For years, I noticed how dissatisfied you are with your status, Caprice." She started and I had to fight the astonishment off my face. "You're rich, beautiful, and smart. Frankly, I don't understand where this love aspiration comes from. That's why I'll let you go for six months."

I stood straight. Did I hear that right?

"Forge a new identity and live a life without your fame, your power, and your wealth. If you find someone who will marry you despite your circumstances I will not force you into a loveless marriage." I was about to speak when she held her hand up. "If you fail, we will not have this discussion again."

"Qué? Pero–"

She cut me off. "Don't do this in Spain."

"Then where–"

"I don't care." She stared hard at me. "Six months."

She left and instead of feeling glad, I was hurt. Abuela didn't give me a chance out of caring for me. She had given me an ultimatum to teach me a lesson in the hardest way possible. The lesson that I wouldn't ever be happy if I was not a Del Fuego.

She never really loved me.

☽

Tell me what you think!
Do you think Caprice is in trouble now?

ps. I am absolutely in love with piercings. I have five (planning to add more)

Do you have one too??

love lots, lucci