(PART - I)

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"Is everything set?" Anusha said, walking out of the bathroom.

Turning my gaze from the luggage to her freshly washed face, I said "Yes. All I can do now, is hope that the weight doesn't exceed the baggage limit"

"Well then, get dressed. I hate to break it to you, but you can't go to India after three years, dressed like this"

"Of course I will change my dress" I said with a roll of my eyes, used to her bossy attitude about clothing by now.

"How will you go to the airport?" She asked, opening my almost empty wardrobe.

"Vicky offered to drop me" I said nonchalantly, glancing at her rummaging through my clothes.

"Wear this" She said, throwing a black and white striped top and black slim fit jeans onto my bed.

"Yes boss" I replied, trying to suppress a smile.

"Laugh all you want but you need to look good when you are meeting a guy" she said, offering a matching hand bag when I shook my head "Why not?"

"My laptop and a day's worth clothing fits only in this one" I said, showing a huge purple bag that's kept aside.

She gave a look of disapproval meaning the bag doesn't go with my dress.

"Comfort over style" I commented as she continued to glare at me.

She sighed finally "What am I going to do with you?"

"Thank you" I sigh, relieved.

"Just promise me you will come back the same way you are going" she said, in a serious tone.

"I will" I promised.

"When you return, you should be the same girl that you are now. I don't want to see you becoming Devdas again"

My facade cracked and I lost my smile "He does not even know that I am coming home"

"Whatever might be the case, you need to come back here, as a strong person"

"I will try my best" I said, ignoring the pain in my chest and the voice in my head.

"Now get ready. Prince Charming might be at the door, anytime now" she said, strolling away from me.

I gave a forced chuckle "He is not my Prince Charming"

"Who knows" she winked.

"It's just Vicky"

She gave the usual 'oh-you-are-so-wrong' look "What? Like I always say, he is into you"

"And like I always say, no he is not" I said, tired with our routine argument.

"Vicky is different. He is not----"

"But he is still a guy. And I am not the kind of a girl, guys want and I will never be. In fact, I stopped trying to be. Besides, I only see him as a friend and I am sure he does the same"

"That's all in the past sweetie. You are a changed woman now" she said, giving me a pointed look.

"I am still the same person. In here" I replied, pointing at my heart.

"I know" She said with a sad smile "You are an amazing girl. Always remember that"

"Thank you" I said, touched by her affection.

"Now get going or you will miss your flight" she reminded, walking out of our room to give me privacy to change.

Fifteen minutes later, I heard the doorbell followed by Vicky's voice "All set?"

"Yes. Let me get my shoes" I said, walking over to my closet when Anu went ahead and opened it for me.

"These will match your bag perfectly" she decided and I resisted rolling my eyes again.

"You packed my gift, right?" she reminded.

"Yes" I answered with a nod.

After a good bye with Anu, Vicky and I are on the road, on our way to John Wayne airport, Santa Ana.

"Thanks for doing this" I said, trying to make a conversation, surprised to see him silent.

"You are welcome" he said with a smile which seemed forced to me.

I gazed at him, confused by his actions when he glanced at me and cleared his throat " So, how many stops before you reach your hometown?"

Turning away from him, I replied "Santa Ana to Chicago, Chicago to London, London to New Delhi and Delhi to Vizag. Long journey ahead"

"Will you call me after landing in India?" he questioned calmly.

"Of course. Delhi or Vizag?"

"Vizag"

"Sure" I replied with a smile.

"You won't forget me once you get there. Will you?" he asked doubtfully.

"Of course not!"

If not for the friends I made here, I would not have gotten out of depression or the pain of leaving the man I loved.

It's not an easy journey to begin with, but it's what made me the person I am now.

Leaving Vamsi meant death to me once. It is still hard but I managed to stay away for 32 months with absolutely no contact.

"I need to tell you something" Vicky said as we pulled over at the airport.

"What?"

"First promise that you won't laugh at me" he said, looking tense.

"O---kay" I replied, thrown away by his troubled stare.

"So----Umm..I don't know how to begin this"

"What's the matter dude?"

With a sigh, he began "Look, I know you may not believe me but I've been thinking about this a lot. And, umm I didn't want to ruin our friendship by confessing. But Anju, umm-- I really think you are an amazing girl. You made it easy for me here. You and Anu, of course. But you, umm I don't know how to say this------"

"Vicky!" I said in a low whisper hoping he's not going to say what I think he is going to say.

Anu's 'I told you so' look popped in my mind but I quickly shook my head realizing that can't happen.

No body's ever proposed to me. No body.

I'm that weird girl who loved driving bikes and watching cricket. That girl who thought romance was weird and overrated.

May be I'm overreacting and all of this is just in my mind. Vicky's confession might not even be what I feared.

But all my doubts perished when he stared into my eyes and finally said "I think I am in love with you"

For a total minute, I gaped at him in horror unable to believe that my mind's warnings turned out to be true.. I would have thought I am hallucinating, if not for Vicky's half-embarrassed, half-hopeful expression.

"Anjali" His voice put a break to my thoughts "I know you find it difficult to believe but I am telling you the truth"

"Why?" I finally voiced my doubts.

"Just because" He smiled sadly not explaining further.

"I am not even pretty"

"Honey, you are!" Sliding a hand along my face, he caressed my cheek "I don't know how I can make you believe it when Anu's trying that for years but I will tell you this. You are pretty and have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. Sad, yes but beautiful"

I closed my eyes unable to process this and he continued "I love how you stand up for friends; how you stood up for Angie when her ex tried to hurt her. There's no one like you and there's nobody I'd rather spend the rest of my life------ "

My heart stopped "Vicky!"

"Marry me, Anju"

"Oh my God"

"I am so sorry for throwing everything at once but I have been wanting to confess for a long time. I was scared, honestly. I didn't want to lose you"

His raw emotion confounded me. This is not the guy who keeps bugging me to go out on weekends and forces me to watch romcom movies.

The seriousness on his face is such contrast to the goofiness that became a constant in my life that I couldn't find my voice.

How does one say no to a friend? A friend you don't want to lose.

Thank goodness I never confessed to Vamsi. Is this how he would have felt if I did? Only million times worse.

Fighting the tears at the memory of Vamsi, I said "This is all too much to take in. I never thought---- never really thought someone would like me like that"

His expression is one of understanding "I know you had someone special in your life; someone who didn't reciprocate your feelings"

I nodded absently "How much do you know?"

"Enough. I know that you still cry for him; miss him terribly" He grimaced and his voice tinged with an unfamiliar sadness "Anjali.. Can you at least promise me that you will think about this?"

I looked up at him "Vicky, I care about you. I don't think I could have survived in a different country if not for you and Anu. But--"

"But you still love him"

"I will always love him" I said not concerned with how pathetic I sounded.

"Even if he is not yours anymore?"

I hesitated and answered slowly "I keep telling myself that but the heart wants what it wants"

"What if I said I can wait for you? Until you deal with your feelings and ready to accept me?"

That paused my thoughts and I stared at him in surprise "You'd do that for me?"

"In a heartbeat" He said it so casually as if my answer didn't hurt him when I know otherwise.

"You thought about this, didn't you? How to convince me"

"Of course" He said, allowing himself to smile for the first time today.

"It's not easy. I'm going home and all I could think of is, how much I missed him. There's a part of me that wishes to see him, at least once before I return. And another part that hopes he doesn't know of my arrival until I leave India"

"Either way, you are convinced he will come to see you"

I nodded.

"Why?"

"Because he loves me" With a sad smile, I said to his confused face "Not the way I want him to but yes, he does"

He frowned "Can we have this conversation when you return from India?"

"You sure I will leave everything behind?"

"God, I hope so"

With a sad chuckle, I said "I do not want to keep your hopes up Vicky because my pain hasn't dissipated in the years I have been away from him. I just learnt how to deal with it"

"May be you will learn how to love again"

His optimism made me smile "I hope that happens. Even so, I need a lot of time"

A glimmer of hope shined in his eyes "Take all the time you want"

"That's not a yes" I added immediately.

"It's not a no, either. I will take my chances" This time he grinned.

"Don't wait up on me" I said, finally getting out of the car to get my luggage from the trunk "If you find a nice girl-----"

"Don't"

"I'm hopeless and you deserve everything" I hugged him and turned away before he can give another convincing reply.

As I raced into the airport and continued with the formalities, Vamsi's face kept popping into my mind.

What I'd give to make Vamsi look at me like that! Probably everything; including my precious RCB jersey with ABD's autograph on it.

What good it does thinking about wanting what you can't have? Nothing except heartache.

How did I miss Vicky's intentions when Anu understood him clearly.

Because you don't know how a guy looks at you when he's interested.

Well now, I do.

As soon as that thought popped into my head, I shook it way. It's not time to worry about Vicky.

One problem at a time.

How am I going to survive the next seven weeks when every place I go holds memories of Vamsi. It's hard enough that I will have to avoid him; if he knows I'm coming and if he wants to talk to me.

There's no way I am rehashing everything that happened three years ago.

I can't be pathetic. Or naive.

I can't afford another heartbreak. I'm not going to survive this time if it comes to that.

As I boarded the flight and occupied the seat, I looked out of the window when memories resurfaced.

With a quick shake of my head, I opened my journal from my handbag and began writing:

What does he look like now?

Does he fancy the same things he did before?

Does he still shave his beard every alternate day?

Does he go to Creme Castle after he wins a cricket match?

Does he go to my room and sleep on my bed when he has insomnia?

Does he still grab a snack in the middle of the night?

It's been thirty two months since I left home and it's long due I returned.

I know nothing would change between us.

We will still be friends. Only friends.

Not knowing if I can leave him the second time constantly delayed my plans. If not for Ananya's marriage, I wouldn't have put myself through this. I need to harden my heart and cannot let my emotions control me. Not this time.

I may never forget him but he shouldn't know that.

My secret has to die with me.

It's embarrassing enough that I'm in love with my best friend. I'd die of humiliation if he knows about my one-sided love and that it was the reason why I left him.

Pausing to collect my thoughts, I continued,

You are strong. Be cool. Make it seem like nothing affects you. Put on your poker face and make Angie proud.

Taking a deep breath, I threw the journal back into my bag just as someone slid into the seat beside me.

It's going to be a long journey and my depressing thoughts are my only company. Luckily few minutes later, my co-passenger began talking to me, successfully deviating my mind.

"So, what do you do Mr. Ujwal Kumar?" I asked politely, losing myself in the small talk that I have always avoided. In a different lifetime.

Thirty hours later, I am sore, grumpy and in need of using a bathroom that's not open in all directions and of course, a real bed.

Nevertheless, finally I am home.

Waiting for my luggage in the tiny airport of my hometown seems strange after running between terminals through gigantic airports in the last few hours.

But as minute as it is, this is home and the home is where the heart is.

Collecting my bags, I made my way towards Arrival gate when a familiar face came into my view among the crowd.

Vamsi. With my dad.

My heart stilled for a second and began thudding loudly against my heart.

He knows I'm coming.

Before he can see me, I turned away to pull my shades out of my handbag and put them on my face.

Your eyes give you away, Anu's voice echoed in my brain.

Put on your poker face, Angie's voice spoke in my ears.

Taking a deep breath, I repeated the last lines in my journal and followed the passengers towards the arrival gate.

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Thank you for reading. If you like this chapter, please vote, share and comment.

It's 2nd of November and Shah Rukh's birthday. What better day can I choose to publish the story inspired from his famous movie 'Kuch Kuch Hota Hai'!

In the past, I have made promises I couldn't keep up. So this time, instead of promising, I am publishing. 

Updates will be on every Saturday and Wednesday (IST)

Before you continue this story, let me tell you that the grammar will be bad. Because I was used to writing in past tense but wanted to write this one in present, I messed it up pretty big. 

In case you are on instagram, you can follow me @janakis01. Just drop me a message that you are from wattpad and I'll follow back.

Thank you for the constant support. I hope you like this one too.

- JANAKI