❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

╰┈➤ 𝘔𝘠 𝘉𝘙𝘖𝘛𝘏𝘌𝘙 𝘞𝘏𝘐𝘚𝘛𝘓𝘌𝘚 𝘖𝘕𝘊𝘌 between his teeth before Sunny jumps off the hammock and gropes around. Due to the isolated rays of the fairy lights, her fur shines a little more and the darkness is not too engaging.

He squats down next to her and scratches her between the ears, even if it wasn't really necessary given her size. He whispers a few things to her softly, making her wag her tail as if she really understands.

JJ has just lit a joint after munching on a slice of pizza he found.
"Still can't believe we're a spitting image of the famous five" he said. "Or is it just me, huh?"

He shrugged, grumbled something, and then sat in the van with Kiara, who just shook her head in secret amusement.

And as for the dog, JJ wasn't necessarily wrong.

Pope also strokes Sunny's head a few times, his eyes glistening and probably meaning more to me than he even lets him feel.

"Well, if you look at it that way and count the dog, there's six of us."

As if Sunny understood, she lunges at Pope and gives him a kiss before he can even begin to flinch.

I grin.
"I taught her everything she needs as a pogue. "

My brother proudly lashes out at me and laughs while spinning the car keys in his hand.

"It's dark enough, we should go," I let him know a little excitedly and as soon as I started moving, Sunny followed me into the passenger seat. However, give her the order to go to the others, because there is simply no space in front.

"There you go." JJ tilts his head and puts his hand out to her, then inhales the smoke from his joint right in front of her face.

I shake my head in disbelief. Luckily, Pope enlightened him.
"Dogs get high too, JJ," he said warningly, causing the blond to lean even closer to the bitch.

"We don't listen to him, do we? I know you liked it It's good stuff, after all."

Before anything else happens during the drive to Figure 8, I command her to lie down. She complies without resistance, which is why JJ grins and purses his lips and almost looks offended.

Kiara playfully rolls her eyes, which I see in the rearview mirror.

Figure 8 looks much more peaceful at night than during the day. Maybe emptier too, because you hardly ever see people walking to the beach, no rich Kooks whizzing around in their expensive luxury cars, and you can avoid people who live in Figure 8.

"Everybody knows what to do?", my brother asks after turning off the van's engine and parking it on an embankment.

I nod, get out and open the door for the others. Sunny waits patiently until I give her a hand signal. She immediately understands that she should behave calmly.

"We're not doing anything criminal, are we?" Pope mutters to himself, pausing hesitantly.

Kiara makes a convincing face.
"We just break in and out without stealing anything."

JJ kicks out his joint.
"You only live once, man."

Pope sighs.
"I won't know you, if we get caught."

I turn to my brother.
"Tell me, do you know him?" I ask, pointing at Pope.

He shakes his head thoughtfully.
"No, never seen him."

Kiara and JJ exchange two amused looks.

"Very funny," complains the dark-skinned man and runs ahead.

"That's a funny one," I mumble, mockingly, and my brother laughs while JJ puts an arm around me, but immediately raises his hands again in reassurance because John B just gave him a silent warning.

Kiara shakes her head and takes my hand. We read the name of the clothing store and she checks the doorknob. It looks high quality and super unsecured at the same time.

"Let the pro do it." JJ pushed through needlessly, taking Kiara's bobby pin and fumbling with the lock. It takes a while before he stands up straight, takes a deep breath and then kicks the door, startling Kie and Sunny growling.

"You watch too many movies," my brother sighs morosely.

Pope agrees. "Definitely. Credit cards can be used to open some doors."

JJ fumbled around impatiently.
"Give me your credit card."

"Do I look like a Kook?!"

"You sounded like you have one!"

Pope looked at me, then at all of us.

John B smiled uncertainly.
"Yeah, that's what it sounded like."

"I have to agree with JJ this time," Kie said.

I hate to interrupt my friends, especially when it's comedy at it's finest. "May I?"

JJ makes room for me without hesitation. Well-behaved.

I climb onto the small wooden bench - on the backrest of which there is gold embossing - with one foot, which is next to the entrance and stretch myself a little. My fingers need a little longer on the foredeck before they get their hands on something cold. The key.

I carefully jump down and unlock the door for all of us.

"Shall I ask?" Kie hisses at my brother, who just shakes his head.

JJ beat her to it one way or the other. "And they say I've watched too many movies."

I give him a calm look. "Real criminals scout out their victims, after all, huh?"

"So you're a spy ..." he nods a little, "That's hot."

I grin. "Says the peeper."
I give him a gentle push and turn on my dimmed flashlight, which I shine over a clothes rack.

Kie and JJ walk a little further back into the store while my brother and Pope scatter to their own corners.

There are expensive sweaters with cashmere and sheep's wool. Then again very elegant evening dresses and suits. If it's purple, Sunny tugs at it carefully.

"What is it?" I ask her, then take a closer look and find the shiny fabric truly indescribable.

"You have good taste." She wags her tail and I smile silently to myself.

After I finish the first page, I move on to the others. JJ is holding a beige suit and reading the label with its inscription.

"T.T," he puzzles conscientiously, "Topper Thornton. So this is where Kooks get their suits made."

John B smiles a little.

"Spit out," Kie demands.

My brother is leaning against the dressing room. "Put it on. We'll dress you up as Kook after all. You too, Pope, don't be so shy."

Kie quickly looks for a matching dark blue suit with a shirt, which she then hands over to him. "Accept your fate."

He's in the dressing room before he can even start a sentence. We'll wait a few minutes. I often drop my hand restlessly in front of the flashlight so that it gets dark, because I think someone might be coming.

Mumbling can only be heard from Pope. Both step into the light at the same time and the three of us stare in amusement. If Topper only knew.

"Sarah," JJ imitates the Kook, "Come down there, you'll hurt yourself." He almost sings the latter, which makes Kie laugh and I watch her a little.

As soon as the two have changed and are now wearing a golf shirt, Sunny growls warningly next to me. I don't doubt her reaction one bit.

"Shit, we have to go," I hiss, signaling, pushing JJ toward the door.

The others only begin to run when the big light comes on and a person in a nightgown shouts at them. My brother and his best friend start laughing.

The shopkeeper runs after us a bit, but I pushed the door open far too quickly for him to prevent our escape.

"I'll meet you at the van," my brother says, before we all run off in different directions and no one mentions a name in case things get sticky.

"You snotty bastards from Cut!" the man shouts loudly.

"Better lower your prices! Then more people could afford something!" Kie countered.

I keep running Sunny close to me and almost imperceptibly when I realize that the others have already disappeared a long way, I turn back briefly - during the run - before turning the corner.

Then it happens. I bump into someone, but I keep my balance and my throat tightens for fear it might be a cop.

However, I also see a hint of startled fear in the eyes of the person opposite me, which is now getting less with every second.

Defiance appears in them, absent-mindedness and the ice-cold recognition.

"Emma." It sounds more like a question than a statement.

I'd really like to keep my eyes down, but that wouldn't be fair and I'm not that cowardly. My breathing is hectic and labored. Sunny seems alert, her ears perked up, and she's sniffing Rafe's pant leg. He notices my excitement after stepping aside to see Sunny.

"What were you running from?" he asks, cocking his head suspiciously.

I give him a playful expression for a moment. "Don't we all have secrets, Rafe?"

He studies my face, unenthusiastic. He doesn't like it when I do things alone, especially when he doesn't know who and if someone else - who isn't him - is involved. Not only does it make him angry. Most of the time he's on the verge of freaking out while I smile in his face and amuse myself at how he reacts.

I never claimed that it's a good part of my personality. At some point it's more likely to kill me.

"So what are you doing here?" I ask Rafe instead, swallowing and realizing I can't take my eyes off of him. How his lips move when he speaks and his veins bulge when he clenches his fist. But his eyes are much more fascinating.

Feelings and words escape from them, that no one seems to notice.

"I went for a walk," he replies curtly. I believe him, even though it's a long way from his home.

For some problems, however, no distance is long enough to be able to forget them or stop thinking about them.

"And tried not to think about you. Of us, Em ..." Rafe takes a step toward me and Sunny sees my frightening posture and growls.

I'm not afraid of Rafe.

I've never been that before and never will be. But when I see the flashing blue light behind him, I feel like I already have one foot in the cell.

"Fuck." My eyes dart to the right, then left, for a solution. There is no dark alley here, nor does it do me any good to run down the nearest street when it is so brightly lit under the street lamps. I have no other choice.

"Hide," I order Sunny, which is why she turns around and runs across the road into the adjacent embankment. I don't have time to look further.

I turn to Rafe, biting my bottom lip nervously and looking up at him a bit.

"Play along, okay?" Before he can answer me, I've pulled him closer to me, the wall of the house behind me and his breath on my lips. But because he kisses me prematurely, I don't need any further answer.

And it's so damn dangerous, because he makes me feel things so vast there's no comparison for them and they blow you away so much that if you're missing them you're afraid you'll survive.

He kisses me softly, then more urgent but not a demanding urge, rather an urge of attraction he can't resist.

I'm overcome with embarrassment as I continue with my plan, blindly sliding my hands to the bottom of his shirt, then lifting it slightly to find his belt.

I would probably fall over if it were daytime and he could see my red cheeks. At least they feel so warm with a racing heart.

When he then gasps against my lips, it doesn't get any better. Not a bit.

Still, I unbuckle his belt, tuck his top in on one side, and after the button is undone, I stop.

Despite everything, I pray that the police car just keeps going. Maybe also so that we don't have to stop here. Because I don't know if he can.

Or I.

His lips are a bit more stormy and I kiss him back a little harder before he lifts me up a bit and I wrap my legs around him. Then he pulls away briefly, rests his forehead against mine, gasping for air, and rests his hand next to my head. Now I can see that the car has stopped. The blue light illuminates not only Rafe's, but also my face.

Please let my plan work out, I silently pray.

"Excuse me," says the cop, leaning his arm out the window, "Did you see five kids running past here?"

I step a little closer to his cheeks, deftly casting a thoughtful look at Rafe.
"No, did something happen?"

He sighs slightly, strokes his beard and taps his fingers briefly on the steering wheel. "The Pogues are up to mischief again on Figure 8. Theft and burglary."

"We're very sorry," Rafe replies, I see the realization in his eyes, "but we didn't see anything out of the ordinary, sir."

The cop nods, thanks, then twirls his finger at Rafe's pants level. "I'm going to pretend I didn't see that, but it's best to keep it private." He winks at me and I fold my hand in Rafe's, perhaps grinning too obviously because I sense he's threatening him glares.

"I'm not going to tell your dad, Rafe," he then adds, before driving off and we watch him go. It's only when the car has really disappeared - and there's no blue light to be seen any more - do I let out the pent-up lust and run my hands through my hair.

"So burglary and theft ..." I shake my head in amusement. "I wouldn't necessarily say burglary. At least I used the key."

"I see. Clever." A brief smirk touches his lips, and I look away from him for a moment, then take a step towards him. My cold fingers carefully fasten his trousers again, as well as the belt. They straighten his top in the same way. Then, respectfully, I keep my hands to myself and smile at him wholeheartedly, noticing his eyes light up.

"Thanks," I whisper softly, and he brushes my hair back from my face, but instead of pulling it back he runs his thumb over my lips. "I missed you. You just avoided me. So good, that I couldn't find you."

He doesn't need to say it, I can tell from his face and scrunched eyebrows that he's hurt and angry as hell. My absence and the uncertainty will have taken such a toll on him that he had to fight the craving for cocaine.

Because to get clean, you have to stay clean.

"I'm sorry," I say sincerely, suppressing the feeling that's brewing in me. "I was trying to get closer to my dad with this thing we've got going. But I can't tell you about it. And I was scared because I don't know how we're supposed to work. I'm good at acting and keeping things secret, but that doesn't beat the twin sense my brother and I have."

I take a breath and just feel heavy. "When these two worlds collide, it must be serious. And I don't know if two things can end up burning each other so that both perish."

He kisses me surprisingly and I put my arms around his neck. Without further ado, he releases himself again and wraps his around my waist. "Fuck, I love it when you talk about us in metaphors."

I smile to myself, look over his shoulder at the street, and feel his heartbeat against my own. "Listen to me," he demands abruptly. "You are good for me. Better than anything before ... if anything has ever done me any good. I need you in my life. You helped me to get clean, yeah? Do you hear? I need you against my dad ... to go my own way. We found each other! You and me", He pointed hardly at himself and than at me, "And that's all that should ever happen."

I hug him tighter, ignoring the sporadic tears rolling down my cheeks.

My brother is probably the most important person to me, but there is no love like the one I feel for Rafe.

And all his mistakes, his difficulties, did not go unnoticed by me, but I help him heal them and I can deal with them. I partly see myself in it. I understand how he feels when he's fighting for his dad's approval and attention.

I've always tried to tell my mom through little things - simple existence - that I still exist. Nevertheless, she always took more care of everyone else, who, it should be noted, didn't need it at all, than of me. Her own daughter.

So it doesn't surprise me that she never told me about my brother. Maybe she wanted to distract herself with other people, so that she could push my dad, the past - and probably me - away.

Rafe says something and for the first time I question whether I've already seen all sides of him. His voice is calm, but the pauses - which he leaves between them - are more lost than any forgotten memory. "You are my meaning - Emma - for all the meaningless things and my value in worthless views, my hope in my hopelessness and my love in my unloved surroundings. You are real in all the surreality. And my voice, in this voiceless world that is ending while you are the beginning for me."

I think what he is saying and what it triggers in me is comparable to a tree falling after you have sawed it off and are trying to plant new flowers on this tree stump. Something is about to be healed in the most beautiful way that actually cannot be healed. Or you never knew it had to.

"When I see you, things happen that I can't explain myself. So intense that I-yes . . . yes," he nods hurriedly a few times, "that I'm talking about obsession on my part."

"Calm down," I murmur, breaking our hug, placing my hand on his cheek.

"Your absence has made me so angry... so damn mad, Emma. That I could have hurt you and then wanted to kill myself, because I had these kinds of thoughts that sometimes I can't control and they ... they scare me. Especially when you're not there and you're the trigger at the same time."

I gently kiss his cheek, brushing away the tears in his sad eyes. Sometimes I think he has blue eyes, because he was born with so much sadness. After all, mourning is always associated with the color blue.

"I'm so proud of you for standing up to it, Rafe. You are so incredibly strong. I don't just admire you in a loving way, much more in a human way."

He laughs a little incredulously. "Sometimes I wait to finally wake up. You seem so unreal. Too damn good for me, princess."

"No, Rafe, your demons are a lot more like mine than you might think," I explain, dropping my hand as the sadness has finally drained from his face.

"It'll be fine," I promise, and he seems like his old self again, with that possessive look on his face and looking around intently.

I put two of my fingers under my tongue and whistle. It doesn't take long before Sunny comes out of hiding, runs over to us and jumps on me.

I laugh happily. She then sits in front of Rafe and looks up at him expectantly.

"She senses my affection for you, so I guess that's why she wants to get to know you better," I let him know, amused, watching them both. Rafe looks at me briefly and something tells me that he's actually not very good with animals. But when he squats down, stretches his hand out to her, and she sniffs it and licks it, he too smiles slightly.

With the back of his index finger, he gently strokes the underside of her large head a little before straightening back up to his full height.

"She would die for you just like me," he states seriously.

"Then watch out, you've got competition," I say, mock-warning, and he gives me an amused grin.

"Oh yeah?" With a sigh, I get a little more serious. Rafe understands, takes my hand and we start walking as soon as the sun seems to be rising again.

"Let's make it official," I finally say, and as I run I bump a stone over the curb that was in my way.

"When?" he asks, as if he can't wait any longer. "Right now. We go back to the cut and not only tell my brother and the others, but also your sister, who we are sure to find there as well. You should know the truth and at the same time we are going a step further."

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜