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April 2020
Pune
Indian Defence Station, Indian Air Force
Quarter No. 15
Change. It's the only inescapable truth of life. It is something that does not give us a chance to show our back and make a run and have a temporary escape. It rather conspire the stars of our destiny in a way that leaves us with no other option, but to accept and adjust to the terms and conditions as it demands. Change is unavoidable and once you do a certain thing, the same cannot be repeated twice. It will, on its own accord find a newness every time, even when we make no difference in the process. Just like what we say, what we do, it cannot be substituted, and it cannot be undone. Aur toh aur jab waqt kabhi ek samaan nahi rehta toh hum toh phir bhi insaan hain, hum toh badal he sakte hain.
(Additionally, when even time cannot remain the same always, we are mere human beings and we can definitely adapt to that change.)
Monami had always believed that indeed change is the only constant and thus, she hopelessly hoped if she could go in the past to stop the events that took place. No, she did not regret it, she cherished it. They were special, they made her feel special but at the same time she did not want her periods to be the reason for her initiation towards their touched intimacy. Albeit she knew that had it not been her menses, she would have taken some more long to finally agree and give in to what her body, heart and mind desired for; his closeness, his proximity, his warmth, and his comfort. Oh, she rather craved the entire human named Karan Shergill.
Monami sighed, looking at the setting Moon in the blues of the early morning sky. Her hold on the railing loosened a bit, allowing her shoulders to slouch a little, as she recollected the memories of the last few days. She was finally free from her periods and also from her erratic and demanding hormones and mood swings. The blush refused to leave her cheeks. She tugged her bottom lip under the hold of her teeth as her mind subconsciously wandered along the flashes of the last few days. Yes, the first night was definitely unexpected, yet Karan made sure that there is no space for awkwardness between them. Their days went on, with the closeness brewing between them, paving away for the long and deliberate brushes of their fingers on each other, replacing the small and mostly unintentional ones. They were now comfortable with each other in their proximity.
Her carelessly fixed eyes fluttered a little and her body stiffened as she broke out of her reverie when she felt two arms tightening their hold around her tummy and a chin resting on her shoulder. She tilted her head slightly which allowed the water from Karan's wet hair cascade along the contours of her cheeks before making their way towards her neck. Monami wiggled her shoulder in order to pull away as she groaned, "Karannn, kya kar rahe ho? Tum already paseene mein bheege huey ho aur phir yeh paani." She tried to make Karan's hands disentangled from her frame but he just secured the hold more, making his wife grumble. "Ab hato bhi."
(Karannn, what are you doing? You're already soaked in sweat and then this water.) (Now move away!)
"Accha? Aur agar yeh sab nahi hota toh tum kuch nahi kehti?" Karan moved his face away from her shoulders, raising his eyebrow.
(Is it? So if all of this is not here, you won't say anything?)
"Haan, nahi kehti kuch bhi." Monami said quickly, wanting him to loosen his hold so that she can slip out of his touch which has started to affect her senses.
(Yes, I would not have said anything.)
"Matlab, tumhe problem sirf iss'sey hai na ki main paseene aur paani se geela sa hoon, aur kisi se nahi, haina?" Karan was hoping that his wife would fall prey in his trap and finally he would do what he wanted to.
(It means you just have complains from the fact that I'm drenched in sweat and water and nothing else. Isn't it?)
Monami clicked her tongue in her mouth making a tch sound and said, "Haan baba!"
(Oho, yes.)
Karan smirked and without giving a chance to Monami, he swiftly turned her in his hold, cornering her against the railing and before his Officer Sahiba could even fathom, he took off his tee making her eyes widen. He wiped off the sweat she was complaining of and let his fingers ruffle the tuft of his hair, to shred the excess amount of caught up water.
Discarding his tee lackadaisically on the settee kept against the wall of the balcony on his right, Karan took a step forward, looking into her dark orbs, obstructing everything Monami could earlier see, because now the only thing she could was, her husband, right in front of her eyes.
Monami felt her throat getting parched as she swiped her lip wet and she could literally feel the sparks of intensely thriving raw affinity between them. She could feel herself wanting to drone in all that he had to offer, regardless of her now calm insides and the fact that it was still, quite early. She feebly mumbled, "Ka-Karan!"
Karan leaned in her direction, holding the railing from his left hand and caressed her face from the back of his fingers of the right hand and without averting his gaze he hummed.
"Tu-Tum, yeh... ach-achanak..?" Monami notwithstanding her efforts, mumbled incoherently.
(Yo-You, this...su-suddenly?)
Karan leaned a bit more and tracing the skin of her cheeks with his lips, he finally kissed the softness that seemed alluring to him. Monami's hands fell on her back, one of it clutching the metal balustrade and the other one was heedlessly dropped on the back of his palm, tightly. Karan traced his nose along her cheek and felt her hold getting more firm on his and he whispered, grazing her earlobe, "Tumhi ne toh kaha tha ki sivaay mere geele hone ke, tumhe kisi cheez se pareshaani nahi hai, Mrs. Shergill." He pulled away, but not before tenderly pecking her cheek once again, and then traced his forefinger on her nose, saying, "Aur vaise bhi, sirf tumhe he nahi mujhe bhi kuch cheezein acchi lagti hain." His voice was husky and he put emphasis on kuch cheezein, before trailing his hand from her face to her free hand, and settled it over his shoulder.
(You only said that except from the fact that I'm wet, you have no problem with anything else, Mrs. Shergill.) (Moreover, not only you, but I also like a few things.)
Monami's mind took time to process what all he said and did. Though she wanted to reprimand herself for just agreeing word to word with what Karan said and she could not even utter something out in her defence. Had someone else tried to do this stunt with her, the person would be getting bandages done at the hospital. But alas! She could not do any such thing. She was overwhelmed with the things that just took place. Her shivering fingers grasped the edge of his shoulder and her toes curled in anticipation.
Karan could feel the same inundate feeling which his wife was. Though it was quite frequent that they would initiate a hug, kiss or a gentle graze, here and there but it was for the first time that Monami had felt the warmth of his hidden beneath the clothes body.
In order to dissipate the charged up air and not to act on impulsiveness, just because a few things escalated, Karan took a tiny step back and closed his eyes before exhaling a deep sigh and then opening them, he looked at his wife who was still not meeting his gaze, looking as effusive as ever. He so badly wanted to bite that apple of her cheeks, because of the way it looked so irresistible.
Karan turned his hand on the railing and held Monami's palm in his, making her fluttering orbs meet his and he caressed her cheek with his other hand and asked, "Monami, do I have the permission to do something that I haven't done, ever before?"
Monami looked at him wordlessly but then she agreed after looking at her palm which was entangled with his. Seeing her response, Karan leaned in again and skimmed his lips on her cheeks before letting his teeth scrape a bit.
Monami shrieked a little, curtaining her eyes with the eyelids as she felt him bite. Monami tried to sway a bit away from him but could not, due to the nonexistent distance between the balustrade and her body and then ultimately she ended up getting more pressed to her spouse.
Karan steadily embraced her frame and canoodled her. He cupped the back of her head and wrapped his other arm more firmly across her back. Monami too, let her arms drape along his torso and rested her cheek on his wildly beating heart. This affectionate hug let them bask in their propinquity, away from everyone's eyes. They held onto each other in utmost silence, except for the occasional prattling of the leaves of the huge tree that was planted on the pavement in front of their building.
Karan turned their entangled figures and walked a couple of steps back until his back rested against the wall and they both could see the sky sideways and then broke the comfortable silence between them as he asked adjusting his arms around her, "Sunrise toh yahan se nahi dikhta phir tum yahan?"
(Sunrise cannot be witnessed from here then how come you're here?)
"Mai sunrise ya sunset se zyada dhalte huey chaand ko dekhna pasand hai." Monami relaxed completely against Karan's form and kept her gaze fixated at the faint outline of moon that was visible to her and continued, "Raaton mein chaand lagbhag har kisi ko khoobsurat lagta hai lekin, raat dhalne ke saath chaand bhi dhalta hai, aur log ussey neele aasmaan ki chaadar mein dekhkar bhi andekha kar dete hain. Subah ke samay, maano chaand ka astitva he nahi rehta, saari importance sirf sooraj ko milti hai. People talk about sunrise and sunsets and in fact, relate them with the new beginnings and beautiful ends but what about the moon? Why is the origination always bright? It can begin even when there is dominating darkness." Monami pulled her head and looked in Karan's eyes as she questioned, "What do you like to see the most?"
(I like to see the moonset more than sunrise or sunset.) (Moon seems attractive to almost everyone during nights, but with the night, the moon sets too and people literally ignore it after seeing it covered under the quilt of the sky. It seems as if during mornings, there is no entity of the moon, the sun gains all the highlights.)
"I like sunrise more, because as you said, it reminds me of the new beginnings and the fact that even after the toughest of days, there will be a new dawn. In fact I find it fascinating when I see that this celestial body has the power to colour the wideness of the ether in accordance with its own shades." Karan answered and then paused before he asked, "Why do you like to see the moonset?"
"It is because it does not take the limelight of the space on which it resides, every time. Yes, at night it is the most prepossessing sight but when it is concealed by the blues, it lets itself submerge under those blue tones. It reflects that not everything will stay with you forever, neither will people remember you all the times and nor you'll always be looked upon. Aur vaise bhi chaand toh itna saral hai, hum issey jitni baar chaahe dekhlein, mann ko shaanti aur aankhon ko sukoon he milta hai. In fact, chaand toh kayi logon ki ankahi- ankahi baton ka raazdaar hai."
(As it is the moon is so easy, no matter how many times we have a glance at it, it fills our heart with serenity and eyes with peace. In fact, the moon is the secret keeper of so many unsaid and unheard words.)
Karan was amazed and impressed with this new perspective. It also forced his mind to think in a direction he had, never before. He cannot even remember how many times he had sat on his terrace just to feel the tranquil aura that the starry sky brings in.
Well, this was quite a commencement of the day. More like dealing with a plethora of feelings. Soon, as the seconds ticked by, the day started rolling in too. Karan came out after freshening up, and well he was decked up in a loose celestial blue ganji and pastel pink shorts, making the already heated up season, a bit more fiery. Monami had to take a double look at him, when he casually came beside her near the kitchen platform and rubbed his palms before asking, "So, hum kya bana rahe hain aaj?"
(So what are we making today?)
When Karan did not hear anything, he turned his neck to see his wife was looking at his attire with raised brows. This sole attention coated his ears pink, as he sheepishly rubbed his nape. "Woh garmi kaafi ho gayi hai a-aur toh...bas isiliye, yeh pehen liya."
(Actually, it was too hot a-and so... yeah that's all.)
"Haan toh maine kuch thodi na kaha?" Monami for the first time was clearly enjoying his fumbling self. The mirth was shining in her eyes.
(Yeah, so when did I say something?)
Karan narrowed his eyes and tried to tease Monami so that the tables could be turned. "Oh haan. Aur tum kehti bhi kya? Tum toh iss mast se hotshot bande ko taad rahi thhi. Aapki aankhon ki sikai chal rahi thi. Hain, Mrs. Shergill."
(Oh, yes. What would you even say, anyway? You were busy drooling over this hotshot guy over here. It was a sight for sore eyes. Isn't it, Mrs. Shergill?)
"Ab agar aisa kuch aankon ke saamne ho toh, kahi aur kaise dekhe koi?" Monami said and while she laid emphasis on aisa kuch, her eyes trailed along his figure, from up to down and then back before she continued, " Vaise bhi jab banda apna ho toh phir toh baat he kya hai. Haina, Mr. Shergill?" Monami pulled her lips in a thin line in an attempt to hide the smile that was literally threatening to slip out.
(Now now, if there is sight like this, how can someone even look elsewhere?) (Moreover, when the guy is yours, it seals the deal then and there. Isn't it, Mr. Shergill?)
Karan stood still on his ground, gobsmacked. His jaw dropped at what just happened. His wife, his Officer Sahiba, just bowled him one ball in the form of the flirt, that too for the first time and he was clean bowled.
Monami broke into giggles seeing him open his mouth and then close it, and then repeat the action like a fish. And seeing his wife laughing at his expense, he narrowed his eyes and low key whined as he grumped out, "Yeh na, bilkul bhi sahi nahi hai. Tumhe aisi googly kyu daalni hoti hai? Yeh galat hai."
(This, all of this is so not correct. Why do you have to throw googly like this? This is wrong.)
"Accha, aur woh kyu? Tum karo toh sahi, aur mai karu toh nahi." Monami made a poker face.
(Oh and why is this so? When you do, it's right and its wrong when I do it.)
"Hmm, keh toh tum sahi rahi ho. I'm sorry, yeh galat toh definitely nahi hai." Karan said seriously or rather faked the seriousness and then a mischievous grin took its place on his lips as he took a step ahead and without giving her to retrieve her steps back or fathom anything, he held her wrist and pulled her close. "Aur iss bande ko accha laga jab aapne ussey apna kaha, Officer Sahiba!" As he wanted her cheeks started heating up and taking advantage of the same, he continued to keep his orbs fixated on hers as he affirmed naughtily, "Keep doing it! Flirting, teasing or whatever that you wish to. Just don't stop it."
(Hmm, you're absolutely right. I'm sorry, but this is definitely not wrong.) (This guy here, felt good when you addressed him as yours, Officer Sahiba!)
Monami felt her insides getting all giddy and jittery. His proximity always does this to her; this and so much more. She just tenderly simpered at him and soon they both got engrossed in preparing their breakfast and then carried on with their day as it went by.
The days passed by, in a completely unclassified manner. It was so weird that probably the first time after their childhood, they were literally spending their days just chilling at home. But it was not chilling; it was a cage they were locked in; albeit for their own good. But they were grateful that neither of their families was caught under the effect of this widely spread disease and were safe in the confinement of their homes.
This shut down from the physical world, led them to generously inculcate a few changes in their lifestyle, ponder over the things and if they can then even act on them, the things which they wanted to do and couldn't, due to shortage of time. It was finally the moment wherein they could use their productivity for a purpose or simply just nothing.
Karan and Monami had planted a lot of mini plants with the seeds of their fruits and vegetables, in the used plastic bottles or the mugs which are no more of any use to her and they had their share of fun while doing so. They actually relived those childhood days where they used to play with mud.
Well it was almost the mid of the second week of April and hardly 4 days before the lockdown will be uplifted and Karan would depart. This definitely did not leave a pleasant touch on their tongue. They would even avoid talking about it. They had gotten used to each other and this was just, well not pleasing.
Monami had a meeting scheduled this afternoon over the disturbances on the frontiers of Galwan Valley and after a long briefing, it was concluded that as of now, Eagles were not needed to fly and get in action.
Soon after this meeting, she took complete advantage of the privacy and connected on zoom with her family members, friends and even Faizi and his family. Well they had an agenda for this khoofiya meeting, in which Karan was not included and that was his birthday that was approaching on the 16th of the month. Monami felt so what, if Karan could not be with her, she can at least bid him a hearty adieu with their little birthday celebration. She chuckled a bit realising how it all began with her birthday and now. Hmph. She did not want to drive deeper on that road.
(Secret.)
While they were discussing what all they could gift or surprise Karan with, given the very limited time and resources, they all started to think. In all this, baby who was hyper excited for her chachu's birthday said excitedly, "Chachiii, mai chachu ko batau ki hum unke happy birthday ke liye kuch sur-sup-supize plan kar rahe?"
(Chachii, can I disclose it to chachu that we are planning to give chachu a sur-sup-supize?)
Monami chuckled at her fondly and said no, and that this is a big secret and Faizi butted in saying, "Woh supize nahi surprise hota hai, chuhiya."
(It is surprise and not supize, you mouse.)
Baby whined, "Faiziii chachuuu. Mai chuhiya nahi hoon."
(Faizi chachu, I'm not a mouse.)
Before Faizi could say anything to retort, he was smacked on both his arms by his wife and mother saying he is a grown up and needs to mend his ways around the little doll. They all chatted for a while and then left the chat since it was close to the time for their ludo sessions!
Meanwhile during all this time, Karan who was bored to death joined the live chat with Rohit Sharma on instagram and this hiked up the number of the people who joined them. They were busy telling in what all they missed and how people should follow the safety protocols and even teased each other.
"Tere toh maze honge na, Udaipur hoga tu toh. Wife and family and your little niece, it must be like a family get together." Rohit asked.
(You must be having fun in Udaipur right?)
"Arrey nahi Rohit Bhai, Udaipur nahi hoon. Lekin ghar he hoon, apni wife ke saath." Karan shook his head and said with a soft smile.
(Oh! No Rohit Bhai. I'm not in Udaipur. But I'm at home only, with my wife.)
"Sahi hai beta sahi hai." Rohit said teasingly.
(You are having a bang on!)
They talked for some more time and in between that, Rohit asked him in his typical style, "Arrey Karan, teri abhi yeh hui na? Usme sabse naya experience kya tha tere liye?"
(Hey Karan, you recently had this right? What was the newest experience for you?)
"Vaise toh poori shaadi he." Karan chortled and added, "Lekin mujhe mere haatho pe mehendi lagayi gayi, so yeah."
(Though the whole wedding.) (But I got henna on my hands.)
They ended the chat in some time and once taking their evening beverage and snack they were settled in the living room on two corners, slouched lazily while playing ludo with full concentration. Monami was quite amused with the idea when she first heard about it to pass their time and have a talk with everyone as well and since then it has been a routine to play it, around the same time with almost the same teams in 3-4 rounds.
In between the game, Karan felt the need to lie and then continue, so he looked to his side and saw that Monami was as usual cocooned in the corner against the headrest and the armrest. He thought for some time before pausing his voice over option in the game and moved in her direction and asked, "Monami, tum please paal goti maaro na."
(Monami, please sit in a criss-cross applesauce position na.")
Monami had a confused countenance on her visage, but she did, as asked, nonetheless. She then focused on her game after pausing the voice over and then she felt a little pressure on her thigh. She peered down to see that it was her husband who without any care was sprawled on the sofa with his head on her lap and legs dangling above the arm rest. Her eyes widened as she shrieked a little, "Karan!"
"Hmm?" Karan was totally into the game, as if this was entirely normal for them.
"Yeh, aise kyu soye ho?" Monami asked slowly.
(Why are you sleeping like this?)
"Kuch nahi, bas aise he. Tum game pe dhyaan do, aur mujhe bhi dene do!" Karan nonchalantly said and then turned on her lap; his face was facing her stomach and continued with what he was doing.
(It's nothing, just like that. You focus on the game and let me focus on that too.)
Monami narrowed her eyes at him but then huffed and resumed her game. And sometime after it, her hand occasionally went in his hair to ruffle and caress them. Karan felt like home, at this gesture and his eyes were in fact trying hard to stay open but then he gave in to his desires and at the last stage, after he came second he said, "Guys you all continue and I'll sleep for a bit."
Monami looked at him to find him looking at her already. She raised her eyes and before she could say something, Karan snuggled into her belly and wrapped his arm around her. When Karan did not get the warmth he was seeking for, he gently curled up her tee from back and allowed his palm to touch and feel the heat that her body radiated.
Monami was taken aback by this gesture and her hands froze in the air. Gulping a lump, she hesitantly carried on with caressing his hair and nestled his face more in her stomach, making his breath whisper against her clothed skin, making her feel tingly.
Monami did not wake Karan, even when she was done playing or even when she felt the need to relax her limbs a bit. She just admired his sleeping self. His sleeping self resembled a gentle stroke of breeze to her. She leaned down and kissed on his forehead and then rested her neck against the headrest, taking a few moments for herself.
Their dynamics were changing and that too so irreversibly, so effortlessly yet with a lot of mutual efforts, their hearts were admiring each other's and the important fact, they were happy, they were content and they were so much in peace. Kayi baar sirf waqt ki zaroorat hoti hai, kisi ko jaan'ne ki, kisi ke kareeb hone ki aur kabhi kabhi, kisi ki aadat bann ne ki.
(Sometimes, all you need is time; time to know someone, to get close to someone and seldom to even become habitual to someone.)
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4.26k+ words.
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