"Wake up! It's time to get upppp." Tiny arms tugged on Amari's face, attempting to lift his head from the pillows to get him to wake up. He was already awake though. He'd been up since seven; he just liked the excitement his daughter had every morning when she came to wake him up.

"Daddy get up now, please? I want you to play with my shopkins." She scrunched his cheeks up, and his head turned with a smile, watching her face light up.

"You outta breath already fats. You don't need to play no more." He leaned up to kiss her chubby cheeks, the same cheeks her mom had.

"I do daddy 'cause papa said he's tired. Please come." She pointed out the room with her thumb, pouting at him.

"Papa?" He questioned, and she nodded her head.

"Come onnnn." She pulled him out of the bed, and her tiny hand gripped onto his pointer finger to lead him to the living room.

"You outdid yourself Trinity! Tastes just like my wife's cooking." Davon's voice caused Amari's heart to pump faster as they closed in on the living room, and his daughter let him go to run over to her great grandfather.

Davon, his grandmother Amara, Trinity, and his daughter sat on the floor in a circle with all of her toys in the middle of them. It smelled like barbecue and the air was warm; full of love. It felt like a perfect fall day even though it was the summer time.

"Come and sit down baby." Trinity waved him over, and he sat down between her and their daughter.

"Amaria woke you up?" She asked, and he nodded his head, turning to look at her with a smile. It slowly faded away when he noticed the blood pouring from her honey brown eyes, rolling down her face and over her round, pregnant belly.

"Baby?" His voice lowered with fear, and her head tilted to the side with curiosity.

"Pops we gotta take her to th—," He stopped himself when he noticed blood coming out of Davon's eyes as well, pooling out in a dark red color. His grandmother, Amara, stared at him with the smile that he missed so much—the same thing happening to her.

"What's the matter daddy?" Amaria tugged on his arm, and his cheeks became wet from what he thought was his tears as he looked down at her.

"I don't know baby. Somethin' wrong." He wiped his face, only to see a red stain on the palm of his hands. It was blood, not tears.

"You hurt us daddy." She grabbed his hand to hold it, and a stream of blood began to leak from her eyes, her nose, her ears and her mouth as she stared up at him.

"I did? I didn't. I ain't do nothin' ma. Daddy didn't hurt you." He picked her up from the ground as everyone else disappeared with the exception of Amaria and Trinity, and he held his baby in his arms while looking over at her.

"Ma ma what I do? I did somethin'?" He tried not to sob, watching a pout grace her face.

"Don't cry love. We'll be alright. I'll see you on the other side. Will you meet me there?" Slowly, she began to fade away, particle by particle. Her diamond ring grazed over his hand once she grabbed it, and he looked down to see two rings; an engagement ring and a wedding band.

"Don't leave me ma, please? I didn't do anything. I promise. Don't leave me." He tried to grab her but his hand went straight through her, and his mouth separated in fear once he noticed that her stomach was sliced up and now leaking blood as well.

"Will you come and see us daddy?" Amaria slipped out of his arms, smiling at him with her eyes now out of their sockets.



Amari popped up out of his sleep with heavy breaths and wasted no time to frantically grab at his face, damn near forgetting how to talk or even call out for help at the sight of actual blood on his hands.

"Trinity! Trinity?!" He snatched the covers off of his legs and got out of the bed, dropping blood on his white shirt.

"I'm here. What is it? Jesus. You scared me." She came out of the bathroom with a frown on her face, and he ran up to her, grabbing her head to make sure that she wasn't bleeding.

"Something wrong ma. My baby. We gotta take her to the hospit—,"

"Who? I'm fine—there's nothing wrong with me. Hey, baby, look at me. It was a bad dream. You're alright." She rubbed his arms to bring him down to earth again, seeing how dark his eyes were as he looked around the room with tears brimming at his eyelids.

"We're at home and we're safe. You're safe. We're ok baby." Her voice softened, and the tension in his eyebrows disappeared as his heart rate slowed down while she continued to rub on his arms.

"Your nose is bleeding. Come with me." She led him to the bathroom, and he followed mindlessly behind her, still trying to calm himself all the way down.

Trinity held the back of his head after tilting it back and pressed a Bounty napkin up to his nose to stop the bleeding. She dug a small blood clot out of his left nostril when she noticed his breathing was off as if it was hard to inhale air, and she wrapped it up in the napkin before grabbing another one from the roll on the counter.

"It's bleeding because you're too hot. Hold your arms up love." She twisted the napkin and pushed it into his nostril, then grabbed the edge of his tee shirt to pull it from over his head.

"Hold it. Keep your head back." She placed his hand over the napkin before walking over to the sink, grabbing the pack of baby wipes he used every morning. He let her wipe his face down, cleaning him all the way up. The blood had stopped by the time she was finished.

After using another wipe to clean up the excess blood in his nose, she helped him brush his teeth and moisturize his face at the sink. He didn't say anything while they were in the bathroom, either. He just cried silently to himself.

"I'm not going anywhere. I just want to turn the fan on for you." Trinity told him when he tightened his grip on her hand so that she wouldn't leave, now sitting down on the bed. He let her go and she plugged up the Lasko fan and placed it in front of him to cool him off.

She sat beside him and faced his direction, putting her legs on each side of him. He rubbed over the one that rested across his lap, trying to gather his thoughts because he desperately needed to talk to her. He never kept anything from her now.

It felt much better to get things off of his chest as soon as he thought about them rather than let those thoughts consume him into a mental state that it was hard to come back from. She really had turned into his personal therapist and he appreciated her so much for that.

"I had a dream we had a daughter—Amaria. Right after talking 'bout kids yesterday, man. Why do my brain do me like that?" He sniffed, dragging his hand down his face.

"She came and woke me up out my sleep to go play with her. My grandma and my pops was there, too, and you. You was pregnant with my second baby. Everybody had blood coming out they face.. a lot of it. But wasn't none of y'all phased, like y'all couldn't feel it."

"And Amaria told me I hurt y'all. She said I did something but wouldn't tell me what it was. And you started, like, disappearing. You asked me if I could meet you on the other side." He wiped his face, upset with himself for crying over a dream.

"I'm scared ma. You gotta get yo' shot next week. We can't have no kids 'til I'm for sure that I'm good. That I won't do nothin' else bad 'cause I hurt you again—in the dream. I hurt my daughter. I can't let that happen a—,"

"I can't let that happen." He used the back of his arm to get rid of his tears, and it broke her heart to see how hard he was crying, although it was a silent cry. That dream really messed him up.

"Baby, it was a dream. Your fears built a nightmare. That's all it was." She moved his dreads out of his face to see him better, holding a small pout on her own.

"Nah ma. It built a possibility. 'Cause I can actually do that. It can happen. And that shit scare me so bad 'cause I know it can."

"There are endless possibilities in this world, Amari. That doesn't mean every one of them will happen. That's all it is—a possibility. It isn't something that's set in stone. You could turn out to be the best dad ever. That could happen too, you know? You could be your kid's best friend. Or we might not have kids at all and you'll just be my best friend. That's another possibility. There are millions of them, Amari."

"You can't let just one of those 'maybes' scare off your 'for sures'; things that God has already set in stone for you, things that will happen. You gone block your blessings like that, baby." She rubbed his face, and he leaned over to put his face in her neck after pulling her to sit in his lap.

"I'm scared." He mumbled.

"I know. And that's okay. But remember what I told you? You have to focus on what's happening now. Worrying about something that may or may not happen won't help you in any way. Right now, we just sitting in the bed. You should be thinking about what we're going to do today, not trying to manifest your nightmare to become a reality in the distant future."

"You're fine. We're fine." She reassured him, using the sleeve of her moomoo nightgown to completely dry his face.

"I don't know what I would do without you." He said for probably the millionth time. He really meant that, though. She was his literal sanity.

"Me either. You'd drive yourself crazy." She held his face in both of her hands, leaving a kiss on his nose while he smiled. It was true.

"I'll get the shot, ok? I don't mind waiting 'til you feel ready and I wouldn't mind doing it now either." She chuckled. "We don't have to rush. We have time."

"Okay. I'm sorry for crying ma. That shit just fucked me up. It felt so real." He reached over to turn the fan off when she shuddered, then wrapped his arms around her.

"You don't ever have to apologize for crying. I love when you cry. I mean, not literally but literally. You aren't afraid to be vulnerable with me and I love that. You love me enough to be soft. And you're strong enough to show moments of weakness. Don't apologize for that."

"Thank you. I do love you. I love the fuck out you. My baby." He gave her a kiss, and she smiled against his mouth as she returned it.

"So..our daughter, huh? Was she cute?" She asked, watching his face light up.

"As fuck. She looked just like you ma. She had yo' cheeks and yo' curly ass hair. And her bottom lip was big as hell—she kept drooling. I know she got that shit from me." He shook his head, and she tilted hers back with a laugh.

"Aweee my goddd. I love her already..and her name is so pretty. I love it. I can't believe I didn't think of it first."

"Me either. I guess I probably thought of it subconsciously or heard it somewhere and that's how it got in the dream. She was beautiful though..for real. And her hands were so tiny. She was pulling on me 'cause I wouldn't get out the bed." He chuckled.

"You really would be the best dad, Amari. I'm not just saying that. I feel like because you went through so much, you know exactly what not to do. You'll do everything the opposite way; the right way. Our babies will love you." She fell in love with the way he talked about the little girl from the dream, staring into his red eyes.

"I think I'll only do it right 'cause you showing me that it's a different part to life than just the bad parts. I used to let that shit eat me up. You make me forget about it. Our babies will love you." He said back, and her cheeks rose with a warm smile as she blushed.

"Now you have to get me pregnant 'cause now I'm excited." She rolled her eyes at him, making him laugh.

Trinity walked into the house with her chipotle bag on her arm, holding the door open for Amari who carried an edible arrangement basket made from a variety of sugar cookies and her Goyard purse. He sat the basket on the counter, then looked at her with a frown once she sat down on the couch.

"What you doing? We finna go take a nap." He pointed back to their bedroom, and she laughed at how he was frowning.

"My sister finna come in here and talk to me. I'll be in there in a minute baby. Wait up for me." She pulled the foil cover off of her bowl of food, and he smacked his lips, sulking back to the room. He would have to do that anyway because he couldn't fall asleep without holding her.

In the middle of stirring her bowl around, both Miri and Leila came out of the guest room that was basically Miri's, making her face light up. She saw that the top of Miri's natural hair was in a ponytail while more than half of the back was covered in extra small bohemian knotless braids, so she knew they were in there trying to finish her hair before her photo shoot tomorrow morning.

"I swear to God I love how that nigga love you. Where the fuck y'all even get this from?" Leila pointed to the basket on the counter, making her smile grow.

"He bought it from a lady selling them on the street. He literally pulled on the side of the road to run over there because I said they looked cute from the car." She chuckled, putting her legs across Miri's lap as soon as she sat down next to her.

"Let me have some best." Miri reached her hands out, and Trinity passed her the bowl and the small container of vinaigrette sauce.

"My nigga just doordashed us some. I swear they bet not skimp it." Leila sat on the other side of Trinity, stealing a few of her cool ranch Doritos.

"Who? Terrance or the new guy?" She asked.

"New guy. Tee been getting on my fucking nerves lately. Been sent that nigga back to his own house. Shit." She patted the back of her head like thinking about him made her scalp itch with irritation.

"Oh.. that's what I wanted to talk to you about."

"What? He getting on yo' nerves too?" She asked, and Trinity and Miri both laughed.

"No, not mine. Amari's."

"That figures. I thought you was playing at first Lei but he really do be acting like a fan of Mari. I would be irritated too." Miri shrugged.

"I literally peeped that from day one. And y'all know I been told y'all that one of the things ion like about him is how he get intimidated by niggas who—you know, on they shit. He be tryna act like them when he next to them, too. That shit so irky G. Nigga not even from Chicago but be tryna talk like Mari." Leila rolled her eyes, taking Trinity's bowl when she passed it over to her.

"Oh my god. Why do all of y'all notice it but I don't? He really pissed my man off yesterday." Trinity sucked a bit of sour cream off of her thumb, grabbing one of her Doritos.

"'Cause you only be focused on yo' nigga girl. Don't even see other niggas." Miri shrugged again, and Trinity laughed since she literally said that same exact thing yesterday.

"What he got mad about though?" She added.

"He didn't like that Tee put his hand by my waist when he hugged me. He said that he didn't like how he came straight for me, like he didn't hug you or follow Leila—it was like he was coming home to me." She said while visibly cringing.

"Foreal?" Leila frowned at her, and she nodded her head.

"At first I didn't want to tell you 'cause I hate when bitches sweaaarr a nigga want them, but Mari really think he tryna get at me. He said sometimes he catch him staring but he be tryna brush it off as a coincidence. He pointed out a lot of shit, actually, and it made me realize that maybe you should talk to him again. I hate weird stuff."

"Talk? Bitch I'm finna beat the fuck out that nigga, what the fuck? He already fucked up when he said that slick shit last year, but I forgave him 'cause you did. I felt like he was lying but I didn't have proof so it wasn't really grounds for me to break up with him, you know? And y'all know I hate being mean." Leila looked at the both of them, watching them nod.

"Sometimes he ask about you, too. But I just figured it was 'cause he be playing like he y'all daddy, just that brotherly concern type shit. Now that you mentioned he didn't hug Miri, I can't recall him ever asking about what she doing. It's always 'Where Trin at?' 'Trin working today?' 'You texting Trin?'. I should've ended that shit the first time he even asked me about you."

"You really should've. Got that weird ass nigga 'round my best all the time and his ass sound like he secretly want her." Miri scrunched her face up with a frown.

"I didn't peep game foreal 'cause I barely be worried 'bout him. Y'all know I just like spending his money. That's the whole reason I be cheating now. Like, he cool, but we more like friends who just fuck around. All that shit dead now though. I wish I would've realized sooner."

"I'm just glad you not mad. I didn't wanna start nothing and I still hope nothing happens. Mari will hurt him, foreal. He doesn't even want him to come back over here. That's why I wanted to talk to you 'cause he paying all of the bills now, so, you know.. I kinda wanna listen to him." Trinity chuckled, scooping up a bite of her food with a chip.

"Shid me too. Been saving buku money." Leila held her hands up in surrender, making them all laugh.



 

I'm bored now lol yall still got like 15 chapters tho. How should I end the book? Cause yall got me second guessing rn