Amari's eyes popped open when Trinity began to move, turning around in his embrace to face him. She tucked her face into the spot between the pillow and his neck, blowing out a low, tired breath through her nose as her legs tangled with his again.

"You good ma?" His voice rasped, and all she did was hum in response, close to dozing back off. Her breathing slowed down as he kissed her face, helping her fall asleep again in his arms.

He rested his head on top of hers as the feeling of being sleepy disappeared for him, and he looked over at the clock on the nightstand to see that it was almost seven in the morning. He usually woke up around six so this wasn't unusual for him. Being on the same schedule for three years straight in prison made him like this.

When he woke up this early, he'd usually just pass time by staring at Trinity until she woke up around ten. He never picked up his phone or turned on the TV. That probably had something to do with his ADHD fixation where he'd intensely focus on one thing for hours at a time. She was always that one thing.

He loved to look at her. She had the most perfect face and he was more in love with it because she belonged to him, so he could kiss all over it whenever he wanted. He loved when she kissed all over his, too.

Amari couldn't remember if he was ever this obsessed with something—definitely not someone because he barely liked people. He couldn't put up with anyone outside of his grandparents for more than an hour, really, so he was surprised he was in this deep with Trinity.

He wished he could tell his grandmother that he'd finally found someone who he could see himself marrying one day. She used to always tell him after his 'episodes' that there was somebody out there who'd take everything that came with him and love all of him the way that she did.

Trinity was that person and more. She'd been showed parts of him that he tried to keep hidden and still hadn't left his side, even after what he did to her. She was too good for him. He appreciated her more than she realized.

The sound of one of their phones ringing made him pick his head up, and he reached over on the nightstand to silence it before it could wake Trinity up. He realized it was her phone and just as he hit the power button, he saw the contact name 'Sharon'.

His eyebrows furrowed with confusion, wondering why his mother who he was no longer in contact with was calling his girlfriend at seven in the morning. He ignored the call and clicked her contact name to go see if Sharon had texted her, and he immediately recognized the date of the message that happened to be on the same day he almost killed her for stealing from him.

Then, he went to Trinity's call log and saw that they'd spoken on the phone two days ago. His heart raced as he thought about Sharon telling Trinity what he'd done to her; something he didn't regret at all but didn't want her to know about.

"Who is it baby?" Trinity quietly spoke from his chest, and he looked down at her to watch her eyes slowly adjust to the darkness of the bedroom.

"Nobody. Go back to sleep." He told her, putting his attention back on her phone. He blocked Sharon's number and deleted the contact and message thread before putting her phone down on the nightstand again.

"That was my phone?" She asked.

"Yes."

"Who was it?"

"Sharon. What you talkin' to her for ma?" He returned a question, and she stared at him for a moment before turning to crawl out of the bed so that she could go use the restroom.

"You don't wanna talk about it?" He asked, following her with his eyes.

"Not really love." She rubbed her eye while sitting on the toilet, realizing that she wouldn't be going back to sleep.

"She was talkin' to you about me?" His voice sounded closer than before, and she looked up to see him now in the bathroom with her, standing near the sink.

"Yes." She answered truthfully. Amari turned to face the sink, grabbing his toothbrush from the holder on the counter. His silence worried her, unsure of if he was upset or not—not that she'd done anything for him to be mad.

When it was her turn to brush her teeth, she watched him through the mirror as he grabbed his box of pills out of her medicine cabinet. He took them dry, as usual, then grabbed a baby wipe out of the drawer to clean his face off.

"You not mad at me for what I did to her?" His tone was low, though not full of much regret. Guilt, if anything.

"I was. But then I felt bad.. I feel like what you did was unnecessary but it's what she allowed to be shown to you when you were a kid.." She paused. "I do believe that people can change, and that she's better than who she used to be, but you didn't deserve what she or your father did to you and I can't judge the way that you react to her."

"My pops used to tell me that I was too mean to her. He knew what she did to me but he was all about forgiveness and shit. I think you the only person who don't force me to forgive nobody. That shit still hurt me 'til this day Trin. I feel like I won't feel better 'til she gets burnt in a crematorium." He told her, then smiled at how her mouth fell open in shock.

"You are so evil! Who even thinks to say something like that? It isn't funny Amari." She tried to hold back her own laugh after watching him, and all he did was shrug. It was true though.

"I ain't lying ma. I ain't even broke the surface on some of the shit I been through. What I told you—that's nothin'. They abused me for fourteen years straight. I still feel like that same lil' boy whenever I'm around her. I won't feel safe 'til she dead wit' him."

"When was the last time you seen a therapist?" She sat down on the bed with him, genuinely curious.

"When I was sixteen and got put on my meds." He told her.

"Have you ever thought about going back now that you're an adult?"

"Nah.. some of my problems ah' put me back in jail ma. You know what I get into." He scratched the back of his head, gesturing to one of his guns that sat on the nightstand. He had at least four in her house and two at his own.

"How many times have you done it?" She hesitantly asked, inquiring about the amount of people he killed.

"You don't wanna know that. I'm already in a deep enough hole with you." He stared at her as he rested against the headboard, and Trinity looked down at her hands for a moment.

"Two hands or one?" Her question referred to if he could count the bodies on one hand or both.

"Two." He said, and she met his gaze to see if he was serious.

"Do you t..think that you're done?" Her teeth grinded in her mouth so that she wouldn't cry, and Amari shrugged his shoulders.

"I never wanted to ma ma. I ain't never did nothin' personal—nobody innocent. It's just what happens in the O. You ask any other nigga there, folks ass probably say the same thing. We all know what we sign up for."

"I know, I just—you're so different with me that sometimes I forget that there's another part of you that I'm not familiar with. It's hard to see you that way love. It scares me a little bit." She spoke honestly, wiping the corner of her eye.

"I'm sorry. I try to be honest wit' you ma. You the only person I feel comfortable talkin' to. And I know I ain't ah' exception to judgement but my life been rough G. This shit all I know, I always tell you that." He picked her up from where she sat and her arms immediately wrapped around his neck once she was placed in his lap.

"Been tryna calm down since I been wit' you. You know how special you gotta be to change a nigga like me? Huh?" He tilted her head back to make her look at him, and a faint smile grew on her face as he wiped her cheeks.

"My own grandparents couldn't do it for me and I loved them more than anything. You the one for me ma. That's why I ain't told you everything yet 'cause I don't wanna run you away. I need you." He laid his forehead against hers, gently kissing her lips.

"They would never believe King Von be crying to me like this." She smiled as she gazed into his red eyes, and he chuckled, nodding in agreement.

"I ain't Von wit' you. Just love." He kissed her cheek next, and her smile grew as her arms tightened around him for a warm hug.

"Yes, you are. I worry about you so much.. I know that I may seem judgy but it's just because I've never been around anyone like you—a serial k—you know," She waved it off with a quiet sigh. "But I want you to talk to me more. I hate that you carry all of this. I'm with you so that you don't have to. Use me."

"I appreciate you. I'll think about it. Think I scared you enough for this week." He chuckled, and she did as well, playfully rolling her eyes.

A knock on the door caused their smiles to fade, and Trinity got up from his lap and out of the bed to go answer it. When she opened it, she saw that it was Leila holding a big burrito wrapped in foil and a bottle of apple juice out to her.

"Bitch please. We still not cool." Leila gave in and hugged her back when Trinity's arms wrapped around her, rolling her eyes.

"Yes we are. Stop being mean to me. I'm fine." It seemed like she had to assure everyone of that lately.

"No you not. But there's nothing I can do and I got tired of being mad." She told her, and Trinity shook her head with a light laugh.

"I promise I am. I know you're worried but you don't have to be sista. We talked. We're doing fine. So don't be mean to him either, please." She gestured to Amari who was still in the bed, and Leila looked at him over her little sister's shoulder with a straight face.

"Anywho..here's your food. I'm on my way to the shop. Call me if you need me. I love you." She kissed Trinity's cheek, whose smile slowly faded away.

"I love you too. Thank you." She took the burrito and apple juice from her, and Leila turned to walk down the hallway.

Trinity closed her door and walked back over to the bed, crawling back next to Amari. The breakfast burrito was already cut in half because it was so big, so she passed one half to him and rested the bottle of apple juice between them.

"It's cool ma. Don't worry 'bout it." He rubbed her leg when he realized that she was upset. "I fucked up. She got the right to feel how she do. It's aight."

"I know. I just hate tension." She sighed, praying that the house would go back to normal soon enough.

Trinity recorded Amari on her Instagram story as he walked back to the car with a stack of cash in his left hand and his gun poking out the waistband of his jeans, clearly unaware of how fine he was. He made anything look good; he could be washing dishes and Trinity would be drooling over him.

"Aye yo Von, let me hold sum' man!" A boy who couldn't be older than ten years old rode up to him on his bike with a few friends in tote, and Trinity ended the video, staring out of the front windshield at them.

"What yo' grades lookin' like shorty?" He asked.

"I'm good! I ate lunch wit' the teachers this week and all."

"And me too, Von. I passed my math test yesterday."

The kids spoke over one another to get his attention, and Trinity watched his whole face light up as he engaged in a short conversation with them about making sure they stayed inside at night and kept their head in their school books. Then, he gave them each a twenty dollar bill.

It had to be six or seven kids in total and she was surprised to see that they all knew him. Some of their moms were at a nearby breezeway and Trinity could hear them thanking him by his nickname as if they knew him, too. She remembered him being well known around this whole block in high school but she didn't know he still had that popularity.

This was what she meant when she said that there were two completely different sides to him. Here he was, passing out money to children and now currently fixing the chain on one of their bikes; but if a man walked up to him with an issue at this exact moment, Amari wouldn't have a problem killing him with his bare hands.

It was such a drastic difference. Trinity didn't know how it was possible.

She loved this side of him, though.

"What was that for? Nah, c'mere." Amari grabbed Trinity's face for a real kiss after she gave him a small one immediately after he got back in the car.

"Nothing. I love you." She smiled against his lips, rubbing over his Louis Vuitton beanie that just made him look even better.

"I love you. Can I give you some money?" He asked, knowing how she got whenever he offered her some.

"No you cannot."

"The fact I even gotta ask that. You get on my nerves." He reversed out of the parking spot, and she laughed at how he genuinely seemed annoyed.

"You just gave me some the other day. I haven't even spent any of it."

"So." He glanced between his lap and the road as he drove, counting five hundred dollars off of the stack of twenties. He slid it between her legs when he went to hold her thigh again, and Trinity laughed at him thinking he was slick.

"What do you be expecting me to do with all the money you give me?"

"I don't know. Buy somethin' you like." He shrugged.

"How much you cost?" She asked, and he looked over at her with a smirk, making her laugh again.

"Foreal though. Take yo' sisters shopping tomorrow or somethin'. Tell 'em it's my treat."

"Ok baby. Thank you." She leaned over the center console to kiss his cheek, and he turned his head so that it landed on his lips just as he pulled up to a red light.

"Who is it?" She asked once he pulled away to answer his phone that rung from his left pocket.

"Pharmacist." He put the phone on speaker after pressing the green button, and she reached over to wipe her lip gloss from his mouth while he drove.

"Hi, this is the Walmart Pharmacy on Doty Avenue, calling to speak to Amari Bennett."

"This him." He sat up further in the seat as he merged into the right lane.

"Hi! I was calling to let you know that we are currently out of stock of Olanzapine and Setraline, and won't have them in time for your prescription refill next Tuesday."

"So..what I'm 'posed to do?" He frowned at her not giving him any solutions after making him aware of the situation.

"You can check with Walgreens or CVS to see if they have it in stock. The Walmart locations within a 150 mile radius will not have them until next Friday, so it'll just be three days late."

"I can't be off 'em for three days. Can I pay extra for shipping or what?" He chewed the inside of his cheek, and Trinity could tell he was upset from the way he gripped the steering wheel.

"Unfortunately we don't d—,"

"Well you need to figure somethin' out. You talkin' 'bout antipsychotics. This ain't no over the counter headache pills. You know what people capable of when they don't take antipsychotics?" He took the phone off speaker and put it to his ear, removing his hand from Trinity's thigh.

"Yes sir. I'm very sorry. It's above my pay grade, I can't do anything about it at the moment. I can let you know as soon as the truck arrives if you'd like."

"Do you know for sure if Walgreens or CVS got 'em?" He sighed with aggravation, trying not to curse this lady out because he knew it wasn't her fault.

"I don't. You can always call and che—," Before she could finish, Amari pulled his phone from his ear and ended the call.

"Ma yo' hospital can give me what I need if I got a prescription?" He asked Trinity while typing the nearest Walgreens location in Safari to get their number.

"No baby, I'm sorry. We only give out prescriptions, we can't fill them." She spoke softly, and Amari didn't respond, placing his phone to his ear again.

"This shit so fucking irritating G." He muttered as the automated voicemail let him know the phone was out of service.

He didn't have time for this after what happened this week.









The way in my last book someone said I only did 4 smut scenes the whole book really got to me 😭 but when I start tryna add more I can alrd hear the haters OMG THEY DONT DO NOTHING BUT FUCKKKK atp girl fuck y'all fr 😒😒😒😒😒