"Thanks for letting me stay here." I sighed, unfolding a blanket and throwing it across the couch in Raven's quarters.

Raven nodded, giving me a warm smile as she tossed me a pillow, "Always." she paused for a moment, her eyes watching me intently, "Is everything okay... with Bellamy I mean?"

I bit the inside of my cheek, stopping for a moment before turning to face her, "We'll be okay." I promised. Despite the fact that I was hurt by his decision, I still loved him...I always would.

Giving me a small smile, Raven decided to drop the topic, changing the conversion, "Did you hear Jaha's back?" she asked, taking a seat on her bed.

"Yeah," I replied, putting the final touches on my makeshift bed, "Kane mentioned something about it."

"I think he's lost it." she muttered, "He keeps rambling on about some City of Light, he's got people listening to him preach like it's some kind of sermon."

I snorted, shaking my head, "Three months in the wilderness will do that to you I guess."

Raven didn't answer, and I could tell she was thinking about something. When I looked over at her, a sigh escaped her lips. Reaching into her pocket, she pulled out a small disk looking object, "He gave me this." she admitted, holding the chip out so I could see it better.

I looked back at her in confusion, "What the hell is that?" I asked, leaning in so I could see it better.

Raven bit down on her lip, "It's the City of Light."

A look of bewilderment clouded over my face as I looked back down at the 'City of Light', "What do you do with it?" I asked, still inspecting the small object, "Is it like a hard drive?"

"You swallow it."

My eyes were wide as I leaned back slightly, "You're not going to..."

She shook her head, pocketing the object once again, "No." she answered, but there was slight hesitation in her voice.

However, by the look on her face I could tell she didn't want to speak about it anymore. So, like she had done for me just minutes earlier, I changed the subject, "Did Murphy come back with Jaha?"

Raven let out a bitter laugh as she pushed herself to her feet, "Who cares anyway."

I looked down at my feet and sighed. Murphy and I had not gotten off to the best start, hell we hadn't gotten off to the best anything. But after Finn's death he was there for me. Although not in a conventional way, I could tell he was trying.

Forcing a smile, I looked up, "Right."

Grinning, Raven reached out to squeeze my arm as she walked to the door, "I should go get some work done."

I nodded, "I'll see you later."

As I watched Raven walk off, I felt something in the pit of my stomach, like perhaps I shouldn't be letting her leave.

---

The next day I was walking from Raven's quarters to the mess hall to get something to eat. Raven hadn't been there when I had gone to sleep the night before, nor when I had awoken this morning, so I was on my own for lunch.

Well, that is until someone fell into step with me.

"Hey," he whispered trying to keep his voice down as to not be overheard.

I nodded my head in greeting as my eyes darted around the corridor, ensuring no one was watching, "Miller." I muttered, turning slightly to look at him.

Miller's eyes did a scan of the hallway, similar to mine before he spoke again, "The job's done." he explained. By the 'job', I knew he meant him and Kane bugging Pike's quarters.

I nodded, quickly plastering on a fake smile as a woman past us in the corridor. Once I was sure she was out of sight, I spoke again, "What's next?"

"We think they're planning an attack on another Grounder village...Kane's going to try and talk Bellamy out of it before they leave. He wants you there." Miller outlined the plan, causing my heart to clench.

The last I had met with Kane, Miller and Harper, Bellamy and I had been on good terms. I didn't have the heart to explain that talking to him wouldn't be as easy now. So, I nodded my head, "Sounds good."

"Meet Kane at the loading zone...2 hours." With that, Miller turned a corner, leaving me alone once again.

Things were becoming more serious, if Pike went through with slaughtering this Grounder Village, there would be no coming back from this. War with the Grounders already seemed imminent, but this move would surely seal the deal.

---

Two hours later, as instructed, I stood by the loading zone, hidden from the group that was currently packing up the Rovers.

My eyes fell on Bellamy who was loading weapons into the back of the vehicle. I felt my heart clench at the sight of him.

"Avery." Kane whispered, drawing my attention toward where he was approaching me. His eyes darted around, ensuring no one was listening or watching.

I turned from where I had been standing, joining him as I awaited instruction. Kane glanced toward the loading dock before looking back to me. "They're planning an attack." he whispered, repeating what Miller had told me earlier.

I looked to him and shook my head in awe. "Why?" I questioned.

Kane moved closer to me, "They want to extend our land, and to do that..."

"They need to get rid of the villages in their way." I whispered, realization setting in.

He nodded as he glanced back toward where Bellamy, "That's why I want you to try and talk Bellamy out of it."

I sighed, my eyes falling on my boyfriend, "I don't think Bellamy will listen to me right now." I admitted. When Kane's face fell, I offered another option. "But I have another idea." I promised, "Tell Bellamy I'm sick, that I'm in medical, and tell him I'm asking for him."

I had hope that Bellamy would at least come check on me, forgoing the massacre of a village. I knew that he was Pike's right hand man right now, and if he backed down, maybe we could delay the attack long enough for Octavia to clear the village like she was currently attempting to do.

Kane kept his eyes trained on me for a moment before nodding, "Okay." he breathed, "Go see Abby, tell her what's happening. I'll go talk to Bellamy."

I nodded, sparing one last look at Bellamy before quickly making my way through the halls to the med ward, desperately hoping that my plan was going to work.

---

Night had fallen, and I still sat in the medical room, my hope quickly dwindling. Abby watched me with sad eyes as I stared at the door. Bellamy wasn't coming.

I truly felt sick at the thought that he had essentially picked Pike over me. I knew I wasn't actually sick, but he didn't. For all he knew, I was deathly ill...not that he cared.

I pushed myself to my feet, trying to hold back angry tears as I turned to Abby. "He's not coming." I declared, my voice cold as I moved toward the door.

"I'm sorry, Avery." she whispered.

I shook my head, "I should have known." I muttered.

I had hope that he was going to come, I really did. But that was all gone, and so was all of my trust in Bellamy. I had lost him to Pike and I wasn't sure how I was going to get him back.

Anger still flowed through my veins as I marched through the Ark in search of Kane. I found him in the storage room that he, Miller, Harper and I held our meetings. He sat alone, staring at a walkie in front of him.

"He didn't come." I announced. But Kane already knew that as he looked up at me with sorry eyes.

I decided to move on, not wanting to talk about Bellamy any longer. "Have you heard from Octavia?" I questioned, moving to take a seat across from him.

Kane nodded, clearing his throat. "I heard from her right after Pike's crew left. She made it to the village."

"Nothing since?" I asked, eyeing the walkie.

"No." he answered, his voice slightly wavering.

I looked over to him, "Should we be worried?" I asked, but I was already worried. If something happened to Octavia, I couldn't just sit here and pretend everything was okay.

Kane shook his head, "Give her more time." he answered, "The Grounders will be hesitant to listen to what she has to say."

I nodded, as I focused my attention back on the walkie. All I could wish for now, was that Octavia convinced the Grounders to leave before her brother got there.

---

A few hours has passed, and we had heard nothing from Octavia. I had sat in the small room with Kane that entire time, my eyes trained on the radio hoping to hear my best friend's voice. As my eyes began to droop and a yawn escaped my lips, Kane had ordered me to bed, telling me he would let me know the minute he heard something.

I had argued at first, but the longer I sat there, the more useless I became.

So, that's why I was headed back to Raven's quarters, another yawn escaping my lips as I made my way through the halls.

I hadn't made it very far when a voice stopped me. I felt my body freeze at the sound of his voice.

My breathing picked up as I refused to turn around, instead I kept walking.

"Avery!" he called again, now running to catch up to me.

His hand wrapped around my arm, preventing me from going any further. "What, Bellamy?" I snapped harshly, turning to rip my arm from his grasp.

His face fell as he took a small step back, trying to give me my space. "I heard you weren't feeling well." he explained, "I wanted to come check on you."

I rolled my eyes as I continued walking. "That was hours ago that you were told." I spat. "I'm fine." I muttered, "No thanks to you."

Bellamy let out a sigh as he raced to catch up to me again, stepping in front of me. "Avery," he breathed, his eyes sad. "I'm sorry." he whispered.

I shook my head, a look of disgust covering my face. "No you're not." I bit out, "Because if you were sorry, you never would have gone today. You would have stopped all of this."

"I'm sorry." he repeated, "I'm sorry if I hurt you, if I-"

"I don't care what you've done to me!" I yelled, "I care that you hurt other people- killed other people Bellamy. What you did to me is the least of my concerns right now."

Sadness covered his face, "Can we please talk?" he begged, "Just please come home."

I sidestepped around him, shaking my head. "No." I whispered, "That's not my home anymore."

As I continued making my way to Raven's, I couldn't hold back the tears, not any longer. As I turned the corner, I stole a quick glance at Bellamy who stood frozen in place, his sad eyes watching me go.

I felt sadness build in my chest at what the two of us had become. We were broken.