⟡ ݁₊ . 💒. 𝓛ET 𝓣HE 𝓛IGHT 𝓘N. . . ୨ৎ .ᐟ
( 002. ) ━━ ❛ you're crazy, nebraska. ❜

baby, tell me what's your motive
what's your motive?
💌
𝓜OTIVE, ariana grande + doja cat.

𝓣HE 𝓢OUND of the doorbell rudely interrupts viola's peaceful night of online shopping and blasting frank ocean. she pointedly ignores the sound, continuing to scroll through the brandy melville website in hopes of finding a new cardigan for the summer. the bell rings again, and viola rolls her eyes, wondering why nobody's getting the door.

"viola, can you get the door?" she then hears her dad yell from downstairs. viola sighs, closing her laptop and pausing the music, before exiting her room and descending the stairs. she briefly glances down at her outfit — rick and morty pyjama pants, an oversized white tee with the collar cut off, and mismatched socks — and decides that whoever is bothering her at this time of night can deal with her less-than perfect appearance.

she opens it, heart dropping and now regretting her choice of clothes as she finds matt standing on her porch with his hands in his pockets. his hair is messy, like he's repeatedly been running his fingers through it, and his eyebrows raise ever so slightly as his gaze drifts over her, before returning upwards to restore their eye contact. viola smiles awkwardly, honestly unsure how to react as she has absolutely no clue what he's doing here. he's never once showed up at her house before.

"hi," she says quietly. "um, can i help you?"

matt appears to stifle a laugh. he runs his hand over his chin, before giving her a quick nod.

"yeah, nebraska," he says, using the same infuriating nickname that he always has. it's driven viola crazy since they were kids, but he's never stopped. "about earlier—"

"is that matt?" viola's dad calls from the hallway, appearing behind viola at the door. she jumps slightly, surprised by his sudden presence.

"hi, mr harlow," matt greets him with a big smile. her dad grins, holding out a hand that matt instantly shakes.

"it's neil to you, son," he tells him. "come on in, i'll make you guys something to eat."

viola's eyes snap to her dad, looking at him pleadingly. he doesn't seem to get it, since he just smiles down at her, before turning back to matt, who is still standing on the porch, silently, as he scratches the back of his neck. "that's okay mr — neil," he corrects himself. "my mom's already started cooking, so..." he trails off awkwardly in a very un-matt like manner.

"alright, no worries," her dad replies. "at least let the poor boy inside though, viola," he adds, before walking off, back to the living room. viola sighs, placing her attention back onto matt. she steps to the side then, giving him space to walk through the door. he shrugs, flashing her a smirk, before entering her house.

matt takes a moment to gaze around, snickering when his eyes land on a baby photo of viola in a pink snowsuit. she grimaces in embarrassment, before clearing her throat obnoxiously loudly to get his attention. at the sound, matt turns back to her, crossing his arms over his chest once again as he leans back against the front door. his hair, despite its messiness, tousles perfectly over his forehead, blocking his icy blue eyes every so slightly. baggy jeans are paired with a brown carhartt jacket and beat up converse, the outfit so simple yet it looks... good on him. actually, the more viola thinks about it, the better matt seems to look.

she takes a deep, shuddering breath then as it suddenly dawns on her why matt's here. viola stares at the wall beside him, unable to look him in the eyes as she suddenly blurts, "i'm sorry about earlier."

matt's eyes widen a tad, his lips curving upwards as he gives her a pointed look. "it's chill, i guess," he says, voice laced with amusement and a tiny bit of confusion. "but, like... if you were so desperate to make out with someone, there was a kissing booth at the carnival, nebraska."

her cheeks burn profusely just as viola's eyebrows furrow in frustration. "that's not—" she begins, though ultimately deciding to shut up as she realizes she's got no clue what to say. she wonders if she should just apologize, shoo him out, and consider what to do about the party tomorrow once he's gone. but even the thought of everyone's confused and miserable faces when they see her alone while julian is with kirby kind of makes her want to be dead, so viola takes a deep breath and decides that there's no harm in telling matt the truth.

"i wasn't desperate to make out with anyone," she starts again, crossing her arms to mirror his pose. "especially not you," she adds with a roll of her eyes, and matt nods mockingly, as if he doesn't believe her. so infuriatingly smug, viola thinks, choosing to ignore him and continue her story before nerves overwhelm her and she backs out.

"so, uhh, well," she stammers, already regretting telling him anything. matt raises an eyebrow. "the reason i kissed you was, well, it's kind of hard to explain—"

"spit it out, nebraska," matt sighs, sagging somewhat against the door. "i've got things to do, places to be."

"right," viola nods, barely even noticing his sarcasm from where she's so flustered. she honestly can't believe she's admitting this — to matt of all people — right now. "well, i kissed you because i'm sick of the whole town feeling sorry for me since julian dumped me. i sort of told people, uh... that we're together."

matt unfolds his arms and places his hands on his hips. he takes a step away from the door and towards viola, remaining silent yet never breaking their eye contact. his lip twitches upwards, almost like he wants to smile, but he keeps his expression neutral.

"i'm sorry," he says, choking out a laugh. "...what?"

viola takes another deep breath, also forcing out a laugh and shrugging her shoulders playfully. "yeah!" she exclaims, maybe a little too enthusiastically because matt gives her a weird look for it. "i basically said that i'm dating you so people don't think i'm completely pathetic, y'know? i mean, i didn't mean for it to be you, it could've been anyone, but it turned out to be you, so..." she trails off for a moment, catching her breath while simultaneously contemplating how she's going to word this next part. "...and, well, because of that whole, uh, lie, i was wondering... if you'd pretend to be my boyfriend? only for the party thou—"

she's cut off by the sound of matt bursting out into laughter. he's cackling so hard that he's actually bent over and clutching his stomach. his giggles are occasionally stifled by a large inhale, gradually turning into wheezes as he struggles to catch his breath. viola just stands there, silently watching as matt practically keels over with laughter.

after another twenty seconds or so, he finally stands upright, taking a few deep breaths to calm himself down. there's still a big smile on his face though, his perfectly white teeth gleaming at her in a way that makes viola want to knock them all out.

"are you done?" she asks impatiently, wanting nothing more for him to answer her question and then get the hell out of her house. matt nods, taking one last deep breath before licking his lips and looking down at her once more.

"yup," he confirms. "go on, nebraska."

she doesn't have the energy to tell him not to call her that, so viola just sighs in frustration. "so, are you in?" she asks matt then, and his face twists in confusion, as if he's already forgotten why he just laughed for a solid two minutes straight.

"oh, you were serious?" he says, eyes widening in shock. viola nods hesitantly. he thought she was joking? really?

"why would i joke about something like that?" she questions, and matt shrugs.

"i don't know," he admits, before running his fingers through his hair. it's almost like he's distraught by her request. "but this is ridiculous, viola, honestly."

"oh, come on, matt," viola sighs. "it'd just be for one day! you can even say you dumped me afterwards or something. i just really don't wanna show up to that party alone tomorrow."

"can't you just not go?" matt says. viola rolls her eyes.

"i tried that, but my mom won't let me," she explains, before raising an eyebrow at him. "you really think fake dating you was my first choice?" she questions, and matt smirks.

"by the way you attacked me at the carnival earlier, i wouldn't be surpri—"

"i did not attack you."

"could've fooled me, nebraska."

his smirk grows at her annoyed expression, and viola is so angry and upset and embarrassed that she could literally scream. out of every guy in this entire town, it just had to be matt, didn't it? it couldn't have been one of her friends from high school, another neigbor, or even chris. no. it had to be matt. just her luck.

"matt, please," viola pleads. she can't believe it's gotten to the point where she's about to beg him, but by the way he's reacted to all of this, she has no other choice. it's such typical matt behavior: being difficult just to get under her skin. she doesn't know chris any better than she knows his brother that's standing before her, but viola is almost certain he would've agreed without any questions, simply because he's a nice person.

matt narrows his eyes at her. he puts his hands in his jeans pockets and sighs, before eventually shaking his head at her. "you're crazy, nebraska," he sighs. "goodnight."

he spins on his heels and goes to open the door, but viola rushes forward and grabs his hand to stop him. matt freezes, his hand cold beneath her warm one, and viola looks up at him pleadingly. she doesn't know him well enough to understand the emotion in his piercing blue eyes, but she does understand when he laughs and shakes his head once again, shrugging her hand off of his and twisting the doorknob.

"matt," viola breathes, feeling helpless.

"see ya tomorrow," he bids her farewell, giving her a small two fingered salute as he exits the house and walks down the porch steps. she sighs, defeated, before closing the door.

viola's heart aches violently as she realizes just how awful julian's party tomorrow is going to be, and it's all thanks to matt — and her stupid mistakes.

𝓦ITH 𝓗ER heart racing and hands shaking, viola finally manages to muster up the courage to exit the bathroom. she'd bolted in there practically as soon as she'd arrived at julian's party, not yet ready to face anyone despite having been awake all night worrying about it and trying to calm herself down. she delicately shuts the door behind her, careful not to draw any attention to herself, before starting to walk through the venue.

julian's parents, definitely some of the richest people in somerville, have rented out a ginormous mansion for their son's eighteenth birthday. viola didn't even know this place existed until now, and has the feeling she's going to get lost in this huge house at some point.

she walks down the hall, following the sound of voices until she reaches the back door, leading out to the courtyard where most of the guests are, since the weather is so nice today. the sun shines brightly down on everyone, casting the scene with golden light. it's so typical of julian to get so lucky with the weather on his birthday — everything always seems to work out perfectly for him.

this becomes even more apparent as viola sees kirby walk past her, red hair glistening beautifully in the sun. her emerald green slip dress hugs her body perfectly, accentuating her long legs. she's so tall and pretty and almost regal, and it makes viola want to shrink into herself and disappear forever. she suddenly feels dumb in her denim shorts and white blouse, wishing she'd made more of an effort. the little braids woven into her wavy hair — one on each side — were cute when viola did them earlier, but now feel childish. she hates this, she hates today, and all she wants to do is go home and drown her misery in ice cream and 'SOUR' by olivia rodrigo.

from where she's standing by the back door, viola suddenly spots mrs murphy a few feet away and grimaces, walking to the side and around the edge of the garden in an attempt to avoid her. if she's spotted alone, without matt, she's going to get a lot of questions that she has absolutely no idea how to answer without completely embarrassing herself and becoming more of a laughing stock than she already is.

viola reaches the drinks table, opting for a glass of white wine. she doesn't even like the drink, but neither of her parents are around to scold her for drinking underage, so she's taking the opportunity to get wine drunk — which is undoubtedly the best kind of drunk — in an attempt to ignore her problems.

she's taking a sip of her wine when four middle-aged women approach the drinks table, one of which viola recognizes from the carnival yesterday. she'd been one of the three women whispering about her, and the memory makes viola rolls her eyes. she's well aware by now that living in a small town makes everyone vulnerable to gossip, but she honestly can't believe that grown adults are so interested in the love lives of teenagers. it's weird, and viola wishes they'd all just join a book club or something so they'd finally have something else to talk about.

the hushed conversation between the four women doesn't interest viola whatsoever, that is, until she overhears one particular sentences that snags her attention.

"nessa harlow's daughter showed up alone today, what a surprise."

there's only one nessa harlow in somerville, and she's only got one daughter, so viola knows immediately that she is the current topic of conversation. she's not the type of person to get offended easily, but since the breakup, it feels like she's just been ridiculed by the entire town for two weeks straight. how is it that julian's the one that dumped her and then moved on in about five minutes, yet she's the one everyone's talking about?

"anne told me she had a new boyfriend," another woman chimes in then, referring to mrs murphy. viola continues eavesdropping, taking another large gulp of her wine and wincing at the gross taste.

one woman sighs, while another — mrs jenkins, who works at the bank — chuckles under her breath. "oh please," she says. "that girl couldn't get a date if she tried."

the words cause viola's mouth to fall open, and she knits her eyebrows in frustration. she slams her empty wine glass down on the table, it landing with a loud thump. this catches the attention of the women, who all turn to her slowly. their faces twist into expressions of embarrassment and shock at the sight of her standing across the table. viola clears her throat loudly, before tilting her head to the side and giving them all a tight-lipped smile.

out of nowhere, a figure appears behind her and wraps an arm around her waist. viola looks down, staring at a man's hand on her hip. his thumb slides into the belt loop of her shorts, resting there comfortably.

"she's dating me," a deep voice states from above her, and viola doesn't even look up to know who it is. she'd recognize that voice anywhere, though she still does a double-take because she's in shock that he's here, with her, and that he'd say such a thing after their conversation yesterday.

"oh, matthew!" mrs jenkins exclaims, purposely avoiding making eye contact with viola. "i didn't know you were going to be here."

"really?" matt questions suspiciously, raising an eyebrow. "because you seem to know enough about the lives of everybody else."

mrs jenkins' mouth falls open, eyes flashing with hurt at matt's comment. he ignores this, twisting viola and his body away and leading them back inside the residence. viola can feel the eyes of all the guests on her, and she opts to just look straight ahead so she can't see any of their faces.

big mistake. she ends up making direct eye contact with julian, who is walking out of the back door while holding his girlfriend's hand. he looks at her, then matt, then back to her, and raises an eyebrow. viola just narrows her eyes, shrugging at him, then looking at kirby. julian looks embarrassed, turning away and ending their silent exchange. viola sighs.

she and matt walk inside, and as soon as they're out of sight, she rips matt's hand from her waist. his eyes widen, like he wasn't expecting that, his shocked expression deepending when she instead grabs his hand and drags him down the hall, back into the bathroom she started the party in. god, she wishes she never left.

matt's back is flush against the wall, and viola only notices now how close they are. he looks down at her, tilting his head sideways as his lips curve upwards into a smirk. "this is a little forward," he muses. viola scoffs, rolling her eyes before taking a few steps back.

"what — and i cannot stress this enough — the fuck was that?" viola demands, suddenly overwhelmed with more emotions than she expected to feel. she's still confused as ever, but a part of her also feels... relieved. and grateful.

matt nonchalantly shrugs in a way that makes viola want to rip her hair out, because why can he never show any actual emotion towards anything? he's so carefree all of the time, and she has no idea why or how he manages to be that way.

"correct me if i'm wrong, but that was me saving your ass," matt replies simply, blue eyes twinkling with amusement. "and you haven't even thanked me yet," he adds, faking a pout.

viola sighs — loudly — before shaking her head in dismay. "thank you," she grits out.

"you're very welcome, nebraska."

she's tempted to tell him to drop the nickname, but she has the feeling that it might distract from the actual questions she wants to ask. viola leans against the sink behind her, staring blankly at matt as hundreds of thoughts whirr through her mind, making it difficult for her to decide whatt to say next.

"you're staring," he points out.

"i'm confused," she retorts. "why'd you do that?"

matt laughs. "i know you were trying to be all tough, but were you really going to say anything to mrs jenkins and her minions?"

no. "yes," viola lies, lifting her chin. "that still doesn't explain why you helped me, though."

matt runs his fingers through his hair and it falls back over his head, parted through the middle. his gaze falls to the floor momentarily as he presumably gathers his thoughts. finally, he looks back up at viola, his eyes steady and searching hers.

"i'm in," he says, scrunching his eyes shut right afterwards, as if he's embarrassed to have said it aloud. viola's eyes widen, before she bursts into a fit of giggles. matt frowns, crossing his arms. "what's so funny?" he asks.

"nothing," viola replies flatly, cutting off her laughter instantly. "but now you know how it feels."

"you're ridiculous," matt tells her, but there's a ghost of a smile on his lips.

"so..." viola starts. "why'd you change your mind? after your outburst at my place yesterd—"

"my parents," matt cuts her off, like he wants to get this conversation over with as soon as possible. viola is tempted to roll her eyes at his lack of banter. "they're on my ass about college and stuff, and they say i'm not taking my life seriously. so, if i have a girlfriend, they'll see that i am."

"are you?" viola asks suspiciously, raising an eyebrow. matt grins.

"fuck no," he laughs. "i took a gap year for a reason."

viola nods in rememberance, matt has taken a gap year. his brothers are both in college already — with nick studying photography in new york, and chris on a lacrosse scholarship in boston — but matt is still living at home. she assumes he's traveled or something, since she hardly recalls seeing him this past year. then again, she did spend her entire senior year planning her future with julian. what a whole lot of good that did her, since now she's standing here with matt less than a month after graduation.

"so, we're fake dating now?" viola then asks, and matt grudgingly nods.

"this party goes until midnight, and it's barely even three pm," he says. "so, we'll pretend to be all in love and shit for the rest of tonight, and then you'll come with me to my family barbecue next week."

"yeah, okay— wait, what?" viola cuts herself off as the second half of matt's sentence registers. "family barbecue?"

matt gives her a funny look. "well, yeah," he says like it's the most obvious thing in the world. "i need to prove to my parents that i'm settling down, remember?"

"can't we just do that today?"

matt sighs deeply, shutting his eyes in despair before opening them again shortly after. "this barbecue is gonna be a big thing," he explains. "i need you there, or this whole thing is pointless." viola furrows her eyebrows. "for me," matt then adds.

"alright, fine," she says, placing her hands on her hips. "you're my boyfriend until the barbecue next week, and then i never have to see you again."

"that's right," matt grins. "just warn me the next time you wanna make out with me, 'kay?"

viola's cheeks burn with embarrassment. "shut the fuck up," she snaps. "i already told you, i didn't want to kiss you. and i definitely don't want to do it again."

"sure, nebraska," he shrugs.

💌 ⋆✴︎˚。⋆ ━━ ava speaks !

viola's parents being called neil & nessa... byeeee gavin and stacey sneak (i will never get over that show)