--caramel

- Reviewer Bun -

♪· Book cover :: 6/10

The book cover is really simple and ordinary, but it did not fail to give off the silent and sad vibes of the story.

The font placement seems just fine and the colors go together very well.

But the story sounds quite sad and angsty by the description and the starting chapters. So I suggest going for a cover which suits the main theme, angst and romance more. It would also be nice if you are able to pick something which highlights heartbreak.

♪· Title :: 6/10

The title is a single word, which is relevant to the story and seems fairly beautiful and right when the synopsis is read, considering how close rhythm and heartbeat seem.

But it's quite simple, and there's a good chance that your book could get lost among the several stories with a similar name. So i suggest you to either go for a unique and creative name, or maybe pick a unique and more beautiful word which has a similar relevance to the book.

Also, I like the way the title is written; it looks really sorted and organized, just like the entire book is.

♪· Description :: 10/15

The synopsis is really short and simple. It's not really elaborate or detailed.

But it's straight to the point and gives a clear view of what the story will be about, what the plot will be and how the characters might develop.

I still suggest modifying the blurb a bit to make it seem more intriguing and pleasing. Try making it seem more angsty. Or maybe you could keep the storyline a secret and work on it. You mould words into the right shape better than me, so I hope you get what I mean and work on it accordingly.

♪· Storyline :: 16/20

The storyline, though not the commonest of all, isn't really original considering I've come across something similar. But your details and backstories make it interesting.

The way the story sets off with slight tragedy and some angst along with slight portrayal of friendship and concern is interesting. It's beautiful.

The events are fairly interesting too, and it's good to see incidents which make enough sense.

The only thing that didn't sit right with me is that Jeon Jungkook, who seems offbeat and slightly pessimistic, decided to get along and befriend someone like Erza. He seems a bit too interested in her when he meets her for lunch, though he was quite low and down earlier. He seems somewhat out of character there, but I'm sure you could fix it with some sad and gloomy demeanor of him.

Otherwise, everything fits alright, and what doesn't for now, will set back in place as the story unfolds, I'm sure.

Or else, it could be ignored and continued like before. The story line is just doing great, and you don't need to do anything that might possibly ruin it.

Your writing style is beautiful too; the plot is exciting due to that and the way you leave the story on a cliffhanger is just amazing. Also, the organized way you have of writing is just pleasing to the soul.

The pace of the plot is fine, but it is fast at some points, like, where Taehyung tells Erza that she is dying or where Yeonjun's collection under Erza's name is revealed. I suggest taking time to do such reveals; it might make the story more interesting.

You also seem to have a detailed explanation on their medical conditions, which is highly appreciated from the audience which loves a book without absurdity and a proper explanation to things. It doesn't let anyone question the book and the terms used in it. It's indeed impressive.

Overall, the plot is fairly beautiful and intriguing, but I expect some more elements to keep it interesting.

♪· Characters :: 7/10

The story just started, so I can't say much about the characters. But from what I've been reading, they act just fine and their state of mind and the incidents that happen with them completely justify their actions.

The only part which doesn't feel right is Jungkook's urge to befriend Erza. Because when the story starts, Jungkook does not seem the type who'd buy gifts or go for a movie or perform while searching for one specific girl. But he does these, which make him look out of character for once.

Other than this, the characters are fairly good and well portrayed. You have illustrated them in a credible way, good job with that.

♪· Dialogue delivery :: 13/15

Another reason for the story's success in conveying proper emotions is the dialogue.

The dialogues are really interesting and suit the situation very well. Some of them are enough to show what actually goes on in the speaker's mind, and some just create more suspense.

But the story still lacks dialogues; it would be better if the characters' interactions are shown more, considering most of it is just description.

♪· Grammar and Vocabulary :: 17/20

Another section where I am urged to throw away my professionalism and just scream how good you are.

Your grammar is just up to the mark, and the writing is really good. There are a few punctuation mistakes, which you can fix with some minor editing. Other than that there are rarely any mistakes in the book.

Your vocabulary is good too, but it could've been better. There is still some room for improvement, which I'm sure you can do.

♪· Total :: 75/100

Strengths and Weaknesses ::

Weaknesses- I don't know, I don't really think you're weak in some area. The book is good and aesthetically pleasing. The way everything is so organized and set in place, is just brilliant. Your writing style is beautiful too, and the way you try to create suspense with the plot is just lovely

Good luck for the future! 

_wxld_thxstle_

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I hope the reviews helped you! Don't forget to follow your reviewer
Thank you for trusting our team, it means a lot.

Regards,

THC