CHAPTER THIRTEEN:
CRIMINALS

WILLOW SAT THERE PICKING AT her food. She held the fork in her hand, pushing the food around her plate in disinterest. Natasha watched her with furrowed eyebrows. She was starting to get really worried about her. The alien that was attached to her was making more and more appearances. Willow had even less control than she originally thought. Natasha softly sighed, placing her own fork down and staring at Willow until she finally put her utensil down as well.

"Willow," Natasha started. She nodded towards Willow's food. "You've barely touched your food. What's wrong?" Willow didn't say anything. "Hey, you can talk to me you know."

"Can I?"

Natasha wasn't expecting this. She frowned. "Of course you can."

"No, I can't, Natasha." Willow shook her head. She knew what had happened. She knew how she had almost hurt Natasha. How she had killed those people. It was too much for someone other than her to handle. She wouldn't put this burden on Natasha. She refused to get close to Natasha, because everyone that she got close to always ended up dying by her own hands. Just like her parents had. "I'm giving back that key to my room. Stay in a jail cell permanently. That's the safest choice for everyone. It'll give them time to get to me before I can escape."

"Willow―︎"

"I can't be trusted, Natasha." She slammed her fork down on the table. "I jumped out of my own window because the alien was so desperate to sink its teeth into someone. I killed people, Natasha. I almost hurt you. I'm not going to allow the people in this building to be a risk to their own lives. You guys can keep me contained in a cell. You can keep an eye on me. You can. . . you can stop me from killing more innocent people than I already have."

"Willow, I'm not going to let them lock you up in some cell like you're some criminal."

"Natasha, I am a criminal!" She shouted before forcing herself to lower her voice when people turned their heads to look at her. She clenched her jaw, her hand tightening into a fist before she forced herself to release it. "You look me in the eyes and tell me that I'm not a criminal. I have murdered dozens of innocent people. I murdered my own fucking parents! Tell me how that does not make me a criminal." She was seething and she was trying not to. When she caught her anger she forced herself to relax and lean back in her chair. She rolled her shoulders, forcing herself to unclench her jaw. "Natasha, no one is safe around me."

Natasha watched her for a few moments. She watched Willow's movements, understood her anger and fear that was radiating from her. Willow forced herself to real the fear back and replace it with anger because she knew it was fear that fed the monster. It was the fear that was forcing Willow to push her away because she was scared of hurting anyone else. Natasha understood the fear of getting close to others. It had taken her a while to get close to Clint and Theodora but the couple had pushed her walls down and gave her the best friendships she could ask for. She didn't want Willow to feel like she had to isolate herself because of the alien that was trying to control her. She wanted Willow to know that she understood where she was coming from. She wouldn't push her, but she wouldn't leave her alone.

"I know what it's like." Natasha finally spoke, making Willow look up at her. "I know what it's like to be scared to get close to someone." She smiled sadly. "I know that more than anyone." She crossed her arms on the table. "Before I was this. An Avenger. I used to have nothing. I was just an assassin that was doing as she was told. No family. No one. I was alone in the world. I had no place in the world. Clint Barton was sent to kill me. He made a different call. He brought me back, he and his wife changed me for the better. I made the choice to let them in, and it was the most terrifying decision I ever made. But it was also the best decision I ever made."

Natasha hesitated for the next part, taking a deep breath before she spoke. "I've killed people too. Innocents. Some deserved it, others didn't. I'm just as much a criminal as you―︎if that's what we're calling ourselves. And the worst part is. . . I knew that I was doing it too. I enjoyed it sometimes. You're not the only monster here."

"I guess we're both monster in our own way, huh?" Willow whispered, her voice sounded broken. She messed with her food again. "Natasha, it's not that I don't want to trust you, I just don't want you to get hurt because of me. Is that too much of me to ask? That you stay away and keep me locked up in a jail so that I can assure your safety."

"Yes, it is." Natasha nodded, reaching over and gently grabbing Willow's hand. "I'm not going to let you rot in some cell just because you don't trust yourself in your own room. Hell, you can stay in my room if you want. That way I can watch over you. Make sure that the alien doesn't do anything. If I have to I will sedate you before you got to bed to assure you stay out for at least half the night."

"Natasha. . ."

"I don't care about my safety, Willow." Natasha quickly cut her off. "I care about you, alright? You're gonna get through this. We're gonna figure something out."

"That's the thing, you don't care about your safety, Natasha, but I do. Okay? I won't be the reason you get killed. I refuse to be." And without another word, Willow forced herself to stand up and walk away and all Natasha could do was watch as she left.