jackie and erin rushed in the door to the walter house, running from the cold, but i took small steps. and small breaths.

though i was letting myself branch out a little more to the it family of the town, i remained cautious. i wouldnt let myself continue to slip into any of the walter's traps.

"are you sure this is okay?" erin asked again, unwrapping her scarf from her neck.

"yeah." jackie let out an exciting breath, and taking both of our hands, dragged us in the kitchen.

"oh, you made it!" mrs walter startled me, appearing from behind the open fridge door.

"surprise!" a man jumped out from behind the corner, and jackie was smiling from ear to ear.

"uncle richard!" she giggled, and i recognized that name as one of the closest family members she had left in new york.

the pair laughed and hugged, and erin and i stood awkwardly in the hallway.

but then, cole emerged from the living room. i hadnt even noticed, but he stood right next to me, watching the reunion as well.

"erin," he nodded at her, but eyes lingered on me, "harper gray."

"jackie said it was okay that we joined." was all i could think to say, but i kept my eyes on jackie and her uncle.

he stared at me a second more, but only nodded.

"hey girls," mrs walter gleamed at us from around the still hugging pair, "its so great you two could join us, come on in!"

erin smiled and walked towards her, so i forced my feet to follow suit.

jackie went to catch up with her uncle, already leaving us girls high and dry on the sticking together and sulking thing, but i found a seat next to erin, and tried not to think of the circle of walter boys around me at this, very, long dining table.

a few minutes into sitting and focusing on keeping my eyes on my hands or my lap, a shoe kicked my own from across the table. i looked up to see danny staring at me.

he held a playbook up to his chest, tapping on it with his fingers, "wanna come help me with my lines?"

suddenly, my chest felt lighter. i didnt even care if my face flushed as a quick yes came out of my mouth. a distraction, please.

"could tell you were getting a little suffocated in there," danny winked at me while we sat on a living room couch, "i do too. i get it."

danny was definitely the best person here.

i laughed, and nodded quickly.

though, quite quickly, i was left unsure as to why danny had called me in to help him. flipping through the first few scenes of romeo and juliet, the boy knew every line perfectly.

"have you done acting before?" his question stumped me, as he interrupted the fifth scene with no warning to ask me such a thing.

i looked up from my paper, "um, no."

he had a different smile on his face, "youre really good at this." he put his playright down, "why havent you?"

i thought for a moment, before speaking slowly, "im not one for extracurriculars."

"yeah," danny blushed, "youre not really much for anything extra, are you?"

suddenly, i was blushing too, "no." but i laughed after he did, pushing my hair back behind my ears.

"why is that?"

"i guess i just," it was my turn to put down my book, "ive never minded being invisible. keeps me away from drama, away from boys, away from-"

"from my brothers." danny interrupted me, and, just like the other day in his car, followed my surprised expression with a mocking one. but he had a silly smile with his raised eyebrows and widened eyes. i blushed, feeling my cheeks go red.

"harper, dont act like you dont make it obvious you are the only girl not begging for one of our attentions." my eyebrows kept rising, "now, do i blame you?" danny laughed, "absolutely not." he shrugged one shoulder, "we're just dumb boys. if i was a girl at our school, i'd stay away from us too." he leaned forward as he said it, like he was sharing a secret. and then he looked to the side, "well, my brothers are. i think im ok." he laughed at himself.

and i found myself laughing too.

then i realized, i had just opened up to him. to a walter brother, and he accepted me for it.

i smiled up at him, "you are ok." i said affirmingly, and danny gave me a look.

"thanks, i guess." he shook his head with a deflated tone, but still a smile.

"no, no!" i blurted out, "thats not what i meant." we both were laughing now, "just," i sighed heavily, "youre different, than what i thought this family was. and i can tell that your different from them, too." danny smiled kindly over to me, and i did so back, "youre much more real."

"thank you, harper." he hit my shoulder gently with his playright, "i always knew you were different too. you just never let yourself show enough evidence to prove it." i tried to hold my smile as i thought about what he mustve meant.

it was evident he had known who i was from the first time i was here, because he knew my name.

but, that made it seem like there was more. had he been watching me? trying to figure out who i was, and what i was like?

and if so... for how long?

"you think youre invisible," danny continued, "but youre not. youre invisibility just made you stand out more." he flickered his eyes in between the play in his hands and my eyes, "to me i guess."

while thinking of something to say to that, a voice came from the side of the room.

"dinner's ready," it was cole, leaning on the door frame of the living room entrance, "come eat." he had been staring at us, but i was still processing the rapid thoughts in my mind.

after a second, i picked myself up off the couch, and followed danny to the table. cole was behind me, i could feel him, but the only two open chairs left when we got there was the one i was sitting in, on one end of the table, and another on the opposite end.

thank goodness.

i dropped into the chair next to erin, and across from danny, and took a deep breath.

what is it with these boys and shocking me? why did they have to be so unpredictable?

all my life, i had these boys, this family, set in my mind. i saw them as all the same, always the same, drama ridden boys.

but they were different. and i had told the truth moments ago, danny was different. he was intentional, and showed when he cared much more than the other boys seemed to.

he was genuine.

i sneaked a few peeks at him as each dished was passed around the table. and while isaac was getting taught how to cut the turkey, he met my eye, and i ashamedly looked away.

somehow, without even knowing me, danny had figured me out. he knew exactly who i was, what i was hiding from. them.

but he hadnt cared. hadnt then questioned it when i started showing up, hadnt called me out about it, well until now. but even now, it wasnt in a mean way. he was understanding. he was everything i thought this family wasnt.

he wasnt superficial.

this time, i caught when the feeling came. i noticed the difference in my chest, the warmth of my body. the racing of my mind.

it was exactly how i felt staring at cole, the other day on stage.

the feeling of realization, of an epiphany. of shifting feelings.

but it was while looking at danny.

as erin and i overlooked the family set up a board game in the living room, i saw cole looking over at our direction.

its probably just at erin, i told myself, as i forced my eyes not to meet his.

but soon, his quick footsteps headed towards us made me lose my confidence.

suddenly, though, another body appeared next to me, in between cole and i.

it was danny. i smiled at him.

good, i thought, cole can now come talk to erin, and i wont have to be awkwardly a part of it.

but, out of the corner of my eye, cole slowed, and stopped completely. and even slower, he turned on his heels and walked away.

i tried to focus on danny's eyes, and pretend i didnt notice.

"so, about theater."

my eyebrows rose as if questioning him.

"you should consider joining." he smiled proudly down at me, and i just stared back.

"i'll think about it." i said, only letting half a smile show.

he nodded, satisfied enough, and jackie walked past him in the hallway, heading towards us.

"thank you both for coming," she said as she handed us our jackets back, warm from the dryer.

"thank you for inviting us." erin smiled.

"come on erin," i said, suddenly feeling an urge to get out of here, "lets get ya home."

we said goodbye to jackie, and piled in my car.

while pulling out of the long driveway, i felt erin's eyes on me.

"how long have you been with the walters?" she made it seem much more intimate that i ever wanted to hear that sentence.

"not long, few weeks. i'm jackie's advisor, so its part of the job."

erin stared at me some more.

"what?" i said, hesitantly.

her smile grew.

"what!?" i demanded.

"you dont really like them, do you?"

i huffed out a breath. what is it with people and figuring that out lately. seeing right through me, as if i was air.

and why did that suddenly make me more ashamed of it?

but, i let another huff out with the truth, "i never really have, no."

erin giggled, "they're dumb, and dramatic. i'll give you that." she shook her head as she looked out the window, "and cole was... cole wasnt the one for me." she looked back at me, "but there are a lot of crappy families out there." suddenly, her tone and her face got more serious, "and the walters arent one of them." there was a moment of silence, "i'd hold on to that for dear life. i wish i couldve."

i let my fingers stretch around the wheel, and sighed microscopically. trying not to realize just how right she was. realize how much i had been learning that the past few days.

cole was everything people said he was; charming, dramatic, popular, could get anything he wanted.

but he still, in the little time i had gotten to know him so far, had proved some of my worst thoughts about him wrong. he was sweet to have bid himself for jackie. and he was much more relatable than i thought he was, talking at monty's that night had been light and easy. not for a second did they act like i hadnt spoken a word to them in all the years i was at this school. i was jackie's friend, and that was enough for them. and it truly seemed genuine when cole was worried about her the night she was drunk, and felt it best that a girl came to handle her, even if there was another motive.

and danny had never once proved what i thought this family was like. being much more intentional and kind, he made you feel like you were valued. that you were seen.

he had made me feel that way, today. and he barely knew me.

the walters kept surprising me. and i hated to admit it, but i had been convincing myself to fight the intrigue that came with every time i was around them. that grew at every factor that shocked me.

intrigue into why erin and cole really broke up.
intrigue into why cole really called me the night of the party, or if there was even another reason.
intrigue into if danny had really been watching me, paying attention, and what for.

and intrigue into, if possibly, the more i got to know them, how much more this family would shock me. would prove me wrong.

and would teach me how i had gotten so good at lying to myself all these years.