A heavy silence settled over both of you, only interrupted by the occasional gusts of wind and the ruffling of the trees.

Todoroki stayed in his place, looking down at the grass. No matter how much he tried to concentrate, he still couldn't get a break from his thundering thoughts. Just when he thought he had managed to keep his father away from interfering with you, Todoroki had to go and hurt you more than he ever had before.

Worst of all, you still took a few measured steps towards him, though you needed to keep two metres away from him. The social distancing measures only lingered at the back of his mind. Yet, this encounter wasn't due to chance nor fate; he went out looking for you to make sure you were safe. According to the girls in your class, you hadn't been yourself since the end of the Provisional Licensing Exam.

You stopped right in front of him, though you wanted to run away. Not addressing conflict head-on had backfired too often in the past, so you had tried your best to understand him and make him feel comfortable. But you hadn't managed to do that in the least.

How can I talk to him after he decided to push me away?

With Todoroki, you either got brutal honesty or outright avoidance of your questioning. Even if you felt like he would reply with the truth if you asked him if he meant what he said earlier that day, you were afraid. The mere thought of hearing that answer escape his lips made your throat tighten, and shoulders tremble.

Fretting to meet your eyes, Todoroki noticed your bare feet come into his field of vision. But what took him back the most was seeing a myriad of flowers dotted around your (h/c) hair. Chiharu had just made them for you, like you had told Todoroki she would when you defended her from your primary school bullies.

He clenched his jaw, the memory of his outburst earlier today playing in his mind over and over like a broken record to the point that he likened himself to a bully.

With your eyes brimming with tears, you made a fist in front of you and gave Todoroki a fleeting bump on his chest with it. I want to break it down, but an ice wall like this...

Todoroki looked down at you as you continued to strike his chest with very little force, becoming increasingly concerned at your lack of words. He wanted to grab you by the shoulders and shake you so you would snap out of your trance, but he kept his hands to himself as he attempted to process your unusual actions. Was this what you felt like when he blocked you out of his inner struggles?

When he wouldn't tell you how Endeavor tried to manipulate him to get him to avoid you - the only person he had ever felt so close to in his entire life?

When he felt like crying, but tears almost always refused to come out after years of enduring this load on his own?

I want to break it down, but...

Todoroki grabbed your wrist, bringing you back to this dreaded reality. His skin felt warm against yours, probably giving away the fact that you were cold, not only physically, but also internally as a frost had chilled your bones in fear of losing him.

Todoroki tightened his grip on you to stop you once and for all. "Why? Why are you doing this?" His soft tone made your heart wrench. "It's so strange, (y/n)."

You lifted your head, reading yourself to apologise to him. "Sho..."

But as you brought your other hand near his chest to nudge him to set you free, he almost fell on his knees out of sheer guilt, realising that he had accidentally used more force on you that he wanted.

Because Todoroki lost his balance for a second and still held onto you, you stumbled forwards in surprise.

Todoroki took an unsteady step back before giving a peek behind both of you. You would both slide down the slope if he didn't do something about it. "Hey, look-"

His back landed on the ground with a muffled thud. Without any time to decide on another course of action, he used his quirk to get you both to safety at the foot of the hill. Your heart rattled as you let out a short cry, but you shut your mouth. Under you, Todoroki acted as your sleigh, his ice making a path while he received the pain of the fall for both of you.

Once immobile, with his bruised back against the grass, Todoroki placed his hand on your head. Your body was heavier than he imagined it to be, but he didn't utter a word, as any sign of emotion vanished from his face to leave his usual vacant expression.

Even with your eyes closed, it didn't take you long to realise that Todoroki had given you a head pat. You looked up to Todoroki from his chest, sudden hope lingering in your eyes. "What even was that?"

Though his bangs covered his eyes, giving you the feeling that Todoroki wasn't prepared to engage in conversation, you began, "I'm sorry, Sho. I really am."

Todoroki extended both his arms sideways as his hands twitched, sweat droplets rolling down his cheek.

"I shouldn't have pushed you..." Finding comfort in his warmth as you were lying on top of him, you mustered up the courage to say what you couldn't bring yourself to mention earlier that day. "I-I just couldn't stand seeing you like that. In my heart of hearts, all I was trying to do was to be there for you. Um... you always tell me I'm not alone, and that's how I want to make you feel. Like you can rely on me."

Todoroki's bottom lip started to quiver as your words stirred a homesick feeling utterly unknown to him. Taking a deep breath, he swiped his hair off his face so that he could take you in.

"Just know that whenever you push me away from you, my heart stops beating." You took Todoroki's hand to hold it and then pressed it against your chest. Both of you had become ghosts of who you used to be, but you were determined to show him that he shouldn't let you go.

Heat growing on his cheeks, he averted his gaze from you and the current placement of his hand. Not even in his dreams, he had pictured you this way, feeling your soft body while you so readily exposed his incompetence and left his insecurities so bare that he had nowhere to hide. "You've become shameless in so many ways, (y/n)."

You jolted in surprise, realising how compromising this situation would look if anyone caught you two. Yet, you stayed there, your eyes staring deep into his. "But can you hear it? It's still beating for you, and you only."

Todoroki's mouth parted, still stunned by you.

"At any rate," you continued. "I... um... want to let you know that I'm strong enough to handle it, so you don't need to shield me from whatever happened."

Todoroki, who had only just snapped out of his shocked state, nodded slowly as his eyes widened.

He had been waiting for something like this. Something like a storm to hit him so that he could realise the error in his ways. He needed to express these repressed feelings he had not been brave enough to utter in the fear that they would only cause you pain. He now understood that being shut out of his life was what made you break most of all.

Your shoulders sagged as a heavy feeling settled in your chest. Despite his discouraging silence, some more words gradually made their way to your mouth. "No one is going to criticise you if you feel down in the dumps sometimes, or if you want to laugh with all your heart. And if you ever feel like things get a bit too much, just know that I'm here for you."

You shuddered. Say something. Please, say something, Shoto.

He didn't deserve you, Todoroki droned on in his head. With that apologetic look in his eyes, Todoroki said in his low voice, "(y/n), will you..."

No. Not that. Anything but that.

Fearing what he might say next, you placed your hands at either side of his face and leaned in until your noses were nearly touching. No, I will not break up with you, Shoto.

"(y/n)." Todoroki tensed up, your warm breath blowing over his face. But what made him crumble with regret was something else. A few teardrops tickled his chin, and he knew well that they belonged to you.

After being relentlessly compared to his father today, Todoroki had almost led himself to believe that there was an element of truth in Inasa's taunts. And it had become a habit for Todoroki to beat himself over being so harsh to you when he first met you. It would have almost been easier if you had hated him back then. If his ruthless words had driven you away from him as he intended them to.

But now, aware that you had said that you would never forgive Endeavor for the many ways he had messed up your life, it made Todoroki ponder whether you would ever forgive him, even though you had reassured him countless times that you were happy with him.

The unknown, crushing feeling welled up from deep inside him, tears pooling at the corner of his eyes. "Will you... ever forgive me?"

While thoughts caught up to you, every part of you went on pause. You then sat up straight, no longer lying against his chest, but bringing your cold legs to your chest to make yourself occupy the least space you could.

"Yeah, definitely," declared in a small voice. "And you?"

Todoroki let out a ragged sigh, as, brick by brick, a part of his walls came tumbling down. He placed his palm against his eyelids and forehead, cooling himself down with his ice quirk. "Yes, though it wasn't your fault, I hope you realise. And frankly, I owe you an explanation."

You rubbed the corner of your unblinking eyes, listening intently to him.

"I didn't want to hurt you." Todoroki used his hands to sit up straight, though his back still ached from the fall. "I let my emotions get the better of me. I'm sorry you had to see me at my lowest."

You felt so bad that you were upset with him, wanting to hug him and never let him go. Yet, you didn't want to come across as too needy or clingy, so you hugged yourself tighter, trying to calm yourself down, though you were far too deep in to even need to care about that.

But then he dropped the bomb:

"And I understand if you want to break up with me."

Your breath hitched. Was this it? Had you not been able to reach him? To make him understand that you wanted anything but that? Feeling as if your energy would escape you, you stood up and circled him until you kneeled behind him.

"Sho, no, it's not like that. I don't want to lose you, and I definitely don't want to fix you because I love you for who you are. I only want to help you fix any problems you come across," you said, echoing what you had told his mother the day you met her.

The frightened child within Todoroki wanted to retract all the bad things he had ever said. They were never a reflection on you, only on his inner demons who wouldn't go away so quickly after years of haunting him.

Todoroki opened his eyes as you pressed your hands against his neck, a dim light emanating from your palms and healing his frost-bitten skin. As a stream of precious memories rushed through his mind, his facial features turned soft. "You don't know how honoured I am that you'll still be here with me, especially after my outburst."

Placing a warm hand on top of your cold ones, Todoroki realised that you were shivering. He turned around to face you, still sitting on the damp grass.

"I-I will be," you said. "Thanks for explaining things to me a bit more."

"No, thank you, (y/n). Thank you for putting up with me." He opened his arms, ushering you to grow closer to him.

His deep voice reverberated in his chest as he spoke, comforting you. "Aside from Inasa taunting me about being the same as my father today, something else happened. Strangely enough, before then, I wanted to believe in the changes he was making. And yet now he's pushing me to cut ties with you."

"That's so unfair." You dug your nose into his shirt, inhaling his familiar, yet distinct scent of firewood mixed with icy mountain air all at once.

"And you know what makes me even worse? I almost saw our relationship as if I had given in to him." As you let him caress your hair, you froze right on the spot. You would've never guessed Todoroki had been struggling so much with himself, as he had kept his calm and collected facade throughout. "It still disgusts me that he wanted me to use you as a vessel to become better than All Might."

You wrinkled your nose in repugnance at Endeavor, but you felt like crying again as you appreciated a side to Todoroki he had not shared with you before. "I can't wrap my head around that, to be honest. I can't hack it... I..."

Todoroki nudged you to look up to him, his fingers circling your face as he wiped your tears away. "I need you to focus on me now. I need you to understand that I'm not going out with you to spite him. I think I've done something much better than that."

Your eyebrows furrowed in anxious anticipation.

As Midoriya had made it clear to Todoroki at the Sports Festival: it was Todoroki's power, not his father's. Todoroki cleared his throat before he whispered into your ear, "(y/n), you're my decision, not his. Always my decision."

Suddenly, the toll this emotionally taxing day had been, became heavier, just like your eyelids. "So... that'll be a good enough reason for us to keep going and..."

Todoroki unconsciously moistened his lips as he pulled you closer. All he could think about was how nice it would feel to taste your lips once again, craving more of the physical contact you two had been deprived of.

With your face an inch away from his, your breathing became more laboured. Almost as if you had fallen asleep at the wheel, your vision faded into black, and you collapsed into your boyfriend's arms.

"Hey, (y/n)." He poked your cheek a few times before he gave it up, coming to the conclusion that you had reached your limit with your quirk.

Perhaps, healing Todoroki after straining yourself at the exam today hadn't been the best of ideas.

But how on Earth was Todoroki supposed to explain this to your teachers?

Of course, he couldn't leave you out here in the woods on your own. As much as he would love to carry you to the dorms, even he knew that it would look suspicious. The last thing he wanted was for your punishment to get extended because he had come too close to you.

However, as Todoroki looked up to the sky, the sunset staining the clouds a beautiful violet and orange, he tightened his grip on you. In his eyes, though you had been to hell and back by this point, with not only sakura blossoms scattered around your hair, but also your clothes muddy and your limbs paling because of the cold he had tried to shake away, you couldn't have looked any prettier.

Shaking his head, Todoroki tried to dismiss his worries about your teachers' reactions. None of that mattered. Not when knowing that you still wanted him made him happier than he had ever been in a while.