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12th of February 1958

I have been ignoring John alot recently.

But Paul kept saying I should let it go and let bygones be bygones so he invited me over to the Cavern with the rest of the lads, and this time Cynthia wasn't going to be there.

I decided to go, but that doesn't mean I'm going to stop ignoring him.

We were all sitting at are usual spot.
I was talking to Paul, and John decided it was a good idea to finally talk to me.

"So Cher what's going on with you?" John asked.

I looked over at John, and turned my head to Paul and continued my conversation.

"Cher, you said you would let it go." Paul whispered.

"No I'm tired of him tossing me to the side once he finds no use for me." I said purposefully loud.

"I hope you don't mind if I join you guys."

I looked up and it was Cynthia, this time with blonde hair.

"My my look what you have done to your hair!" John said as he got up and touched her hair.

I turned my head to Paul.

"Honest! She said she wasn't coming!" Paul raised his hands up.

"I'm sorry for coming in unexpected." Cynthia said softspoken.

"You seem to look like one of those film stars." Stuart pointed out.

Cynthia smiled and took a seat next to John.

"It seems like she tried to copy Grape — I mean Cherry here." Pete stated.

"Don't try to start drama now Pete." John raised his eyebrows.

"She seems like a try-hard to me." I mumbled to Paul.

"What was that?" John asked.

"I said —"

"She said she would like to try some more of my drink." Paul interrupted me, and slid over his beer bottle.
I slid it right back to him.

I turned around to the band that was playing, and smiled. They were playing my favorite song, our favorite song Maybe Tomorrow.

In the spring of '57 I made a stupid promise with John, whenever we heard the song 'Maybe Tomorrow' we had to get up and slow dance together. No matter where we are, no matter how mad we are, no matter what, we had to dance. It gave me the only reason to actually be close to him, and intimate before our first kiss in the summer.

I turned my head to him, and he was already looking in my direction smiling.

I quickly darted my eyes away.

I saw from the corner of my eyes John getting up.
I turned around, and John had his hand out.
Waiting for me to grab it, so we can dance.

I shook my head. This was dumb, he had a girlfriend, and it just seems too much for a guy who doesn't like me at all.

John soon grabbed my arm, and tugged me to stand up.

John put his arms on my waist and I slowly put my arms over his shoulders.
We both swayed to the music

John just kept looking at me.
"What are you mad about?"

"Nothing."
I looked away from him.

"I know your mad about Cyn, but you said we were just friends and"—

I quickly interrupted John, and pulled away from him.
"How much do I have to make it obvious that I like you! I wanted to be more than friends, I thought you felt the same way you let me kiss you, and you kissed me when we made that cake— and all of this is just an excuse for me to be closer to you! Can't you see I was just too afraid to actually say it?"

After I was done making a scene, I looked around and people just watched, I didn't even want to look at the lads or Cynthia I just darted into the bathroom.

I looked into the bathroom mirror and wiped away, my black tears from the running mascara.
I stayed in there for some time just thinking, and fixing myself up.

As soon as I left the bathroom I see a lonely John sitting at an empty table were the lads and Cynthia used to be, they probably have gone home.

John noticed me straight away and waved me over.
I walked up, and he just smirked and shook his head.
"Take a seat."

I stayed silent and sat across from him.

"I remembered liking you and you not liking me back...Now look the tables have turned."

I crossed my arms
"Really are you trying to gloat now?"

"No I didn't mean for it sound like that. I'm just noticing how the both of us never had good-timing." John shook his head.

"Is it for the best?" I looked down at my hands

"I don't know, but Cher I feel like I really do love Cyn."

Those words felt like a stab in my chest.

I nodded
"Yeah— I understand John, she's good for you."

John smiled
"Cher, you know I love you as well, hell I've known you since we were wee little kids."

"Maybe in another life then."
I tried to not look so hurt, and smiled.

"Only time will tell, now let me walk you home you cry baby." John teased

"Alright." I got up and walked with John out the cavern.

"I'm just thinking about how we said we were friends with benefits but we actually haven't done the benefit part of it." John laughed.

I spoke lowly
"Well true, but I did have one benefit."

"And what was that?"

"Your kisses."

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