IT WAS A FEW DAYS before I woke up, according to Macey. She was the one who kept guard, who carried me back to the house, and who checked for any injuries. She was the one who stayed there for days, watching and waiting. She was the one who was there when I woke up, who asked me if I was okay before launching into the 'what the hell is going on' rant.

She was the one who heard everyone avoid going too close to my room, as if they might become Tainted just by being near me.

"When did it happen?" she asked, curled up in bed with me. I sat up a little, readjusting the covers before answering her question.

"A few weeks ago, when we broke into Warren Yaxley's place."

"A few..." she stared at me in disbelief. "A few weeks? You've been hiding this from us for a few weeks?"

"I'm sorry," I said again. Over the past two days, it seemed to have become my mantra.

"For which part?" she snapped. I flinched, and her face softened. "I just... it's hard to realize your best friend has been lying to you."

I bit back tears, beyond tired of feeling so stressed and nervous around her. "I know. I wanted to tell you, I was just worried you'd change your mind when you found out I was Tainted."

"Change my mind?" she asked, confused.

"Oh, yeah. When I blacked out for a few days, I could hear you guys. Not much, and only in bits and pieces, but it was enough to get the gist of when you guys talked about me--Syrena didn't trust that I wasn't, and you defended me."

"You're welcome. And also, what the hell is wrong with you? Did you really think I would care, even if you were?"

"I just... No. I was just afraid, that's all."

"Well, don't be. You still haven't told me what you can do, by the way," she said, curiosity spread across her face.

"I can... I don't really know how to explain it. I can sort of sense the life around me, I guess. I sort of go into this state and I can kind of... Ugh, I don't know. I can just sort of feel everything around me, like this sort of warm hum, I guess?"

"That's so..."

"Freaky?"

"Beautiful," she corrected. I felt my heart swell, and I knew I had never been so happy to have my best friend.

"Yeah," I said, smiling. "I guess it really is."

"Not what I expected, though," she said thoughtfully. "I mean, I figured it had to be healing people, especially with what you did with Thomas. How'd your Sense fit into that?"

I frowned, thinking. "I don't really know. I've got this theory, though--you know the ring Warren Yaxley is rumored to have found, the one that brought back magic and we all knew couldn't possibly exist?"

"Yes," she said warily.

"I think it does. He grabbed me when I was running from his office, and he was wearing a ring. When it came into contact with my skin, we got blasted to opposite sides of the room--I think that maybe that jumpstarted my powers, made them more advanced than they were supposed to be."

She looked at me with wide eyes. "So what else can you do?"

"That's what I've been wondering. I also noticed that sometimes, when you guys talk about how you suddenly felt better about something I usually suddenly felt worse about something. So either I can absorb negative emotions, or I've officially hit crazy."

"Probably both," she said, and we laughed. We were like that, doubled over laughing, fingers laced together, when Thomas walked in.

"Yes?" Macey asked, suddenly much cooler. I wondered why, but was too busy not meeting his gaze (and pretending I wasn't using my best friend's hand as a lifeline) to figure anything out.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay," he said. I waited for her to tell him that she was fine, gazing out the window to distract myself from the painful throbbing in my chest.

"Sam?" he asked. I turned, trying and failing to hide my surprise.

"I... yeah. I'm fine. What about you? Did you heal alright?"

He suddenly looked very uncomfortable. "Yeah, not even a scar. Which I, uh, wanted to ask you about... See, Syrena seems to be under this insane impression that you really are Tainted, and I just want to prove her wrong, once and for all..."

There was an almost comically desperate look on his face, and I hated to break it, but I was done with lying.

"No, it's true. I'm sorry, Thomas."

There was silence for a moment, and then the door closed. I heard him walk down the steps and out of the house before I let the tears escape.

"Hey, don't worry," Macey said, leaning over. I collapsed into her, trying not to let my sobs escape. "Don't worry, everything will be okay. You'll see. Soon, everything will be back to normal, and it'll all be fine."

There were nonsensical words, and she knew it. It was the crap you said when someone cried so they'd calm down, so you could think of something to actually say that would comfort them.

But I knew. I had known as soon as I heard that door shut, as soon as I had said the words we all needed to hear.

Nothing was going back to normal. Not soon, not ever. This wasn't something that anything in world could fix. And I knew that Macey knew it, too.

***

AFTER another two days of wallowing in bed, I knew it was time to go downstairs and face the music (or in this case, funeral drum). I took an absurdly long bath, got dressed as slowly as possible, and spent no less than and hour and a half braiding, undoing it, and then re braiding my hair until it was as close to perfect as I could physically get it.

"Ready?" Macey asked. I looked at her, fight back waves of nausea.

"To walk through my own house? Nope. You?"

"Dreading it. Shall we go?"

I opened the door and started to go downstairs, crossing my fingers I could make it to the kitchen without passing out or encountering anyone.

"What are you going to want to eat for dinner first?" Macey asked. I knew she was just as nervous as I was, because she kept tightening and then relaxing her grip on my hand.

"Um... fruit."

"Fruit?"

"Yep."

"You're a changed woman--I could've sworn you would go for chocolate."

"Well, now that you mention it--" I started, a slight grin creeping across my face.

"Don't you even start," she warned. "Chocolate is at least 3 times as dangerous for you health as fruit."

I smiled fully, happy to be back in our normal routine. "Whatever, you health nut. Chocolate's delicious, and I know you're just as addicted as me."

She rolled her eyes, but wasn't in enough self-denial (yet) to deny the accusation. I was finally starting to relax, letting my feet guide me through the familiar space,

And of course, that was the moment that I ran into Thomas.