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It's been over two weeks since my night with Jenna at the karaoke bar. The night that nearly gave me a heart attack when that jackass decided to follow her to the restroom. Since that night, I haven't been able to think of anything but the look in her eyes and that smile she gave me when she left.

It gave me hope that she could possibly harbor feelings for me. Feelings that I never thought I'd want, feelings that make me feel strange and confused. I think I'm turning soft, becoming the kind of guy that I swore I'd never be. I'm considering things like commitment and dating. The thought of settling down is terrifying, but doing so with a woman like Jenna- that's something I can get behind.

The team has a week of traveling ahead of us, and we're currently taking a shuttle from the airport to our hotel. My roommate when we travel is usually Damien, one of our goalies. He's sitting next to me on the bus, showing me someone he matched with on his dating app. I feign interest and nod my head as he goes on and on about how hot she is and how he plans on meeting up with her after our game tomorrow.

It's something I probably would have done, too, if it weren't for Jenna. Now that I have these strange new feelings for her, no other woman even comes close. I don't even know if I have a chance with her, but the thought of anyone coming in and messing things up with her makes me crazy.

Since my realization that I've started to catch feelings for her, I've texted her a few times, trying to make small talk, but I'm too chicken to admit how I feel. Part of me wants to do it- just go for it, consequences be damned. The other part is terrified of rejection. Yeah, she's rejected me before, but that was back when I didn't feel like this. Now, I think her rejection would sting a lot more. Now, it could really do some damage.

~

After our first away game, Damien tells me he won't be coming back to our room for the night because he's hooking up with his dating app girl at her place. He makes sure to let me know that the hotel room is mine if I want to bring a girl back.

I haven't brought a girl back to our hotel all season. Why would I start now? At first, I'd play along when he'd make an offer like this and say, 'oh yeah, thanks, man' or 'you know I'll be getting some.' For some reason, I don't feel like playing along anymore- I haven't for a while. So, instead of my usual replies, I've been telling him the truth- that I won't be needing the room for random hookups. Lately, at that kind of response, Damien just gives me a weird look and walks away- not this time. This time he has to comment.

He's staring at me intently. "You know, I heard you were a huge player over in Chicago. I'm just not seeing it. What happened, man? You catch something?"

Yeah, feelings. But that's not what he's talking about.

I scoff at his insinuation. "No, I didn't catch anything. Just not feeling it. Focusing on the game."

He eyes me suspiciously but drops the subject. "Okay, bro. Whatever."

With that, he leaves to meet up with his hookup, and I can finally relax. I pick up my phone and contemplate texting Jenna. After ten minutes, I decided against it and instead settled on scrolling through her social media pages. I look through her photos and smile at how happy she looks. I want to be a part of that. I just need to work up the nerve to tell her how I feel.

~

In the next city we travel to, the guys decide they want to check out a popular dance club. I try to decline, but they bust my balls until I give in. I'd much rather just go back to the hotel and watch a movie, but no, I'm being dragged to a packed nightclub that's swimming with puck bunnies and other jersey chasers.

As soon as we enter the building, girls rush over to us. Most are dressed in low-cut tops with tiny skirts that would definitely give away a free show if they were to move in just the right direction. This is the kind of attention I used to thrive on. Now, it does nothing for me. And when I say nothing, I mean nothing- not even the slightest reaction downstairs. Damien, Drew, Rob, and some of the other guys love the attention, though. They're smiling and giving each other high-fives.

So, you can imagine their reactions when I push away the girls who try to jump all over me. Seriously, they're like vultures, swarming at the smell of fresh meat. One girl tries to kiss me, and I dodge her. Another grabs my ass, and a more desperate one goes for my junk. I grabbed their hands so fast and pushed them away; they hardly had time to process what was happening. The boys saw the whole thing.

When we find the VIP section and have a tiny bit of privacy, Rob and Damien start giving me shit about the girls.

Rob asks, "What man, those girls weren't your type?"

I shake my head. "Nope."

Damien comments on how I don't have a type. Chuck chimes in and says I need to loosen up. I finally start to tune them out. I should have just stayed at the hotel. I should have told these guys I was hanging with Chase and Liam. Those two made the right call and stayed back. As did Dan and Tyler, but Dan's married and Tyler's engaged. They have good excuses not to come out with the boys. Chase and Liam just do what they want, and no one gives them shit. I should have just said fuck it and stayed with them. If these guys want to talk shit, whatever, let them.

I look up and catch Drew eyeing me. He's the only one that seems to have picked up on my growing feelings for Jenna. I'm not sure what he thinks about it, and I'm not going to ask. He was one of the first to tell me she's off-limits, after all. I am grateful, though, that he doesn't jump in and harass me about the fangirls along with the other guys.

~

We travel to one more city during this away trek. The games haven't been going well. Something is off with everyone, especially Chase and Liam. They don't want to talk about it, but whatever is going on is starting to affect all of us.

So, instead of splitting up and doing different things, the whole team is going out for dinner tonight. I'm happy I don't have to try and dodge another outing with the boys to some bar or nightclub again. That one night was torture enough.

After we've all ordered, we start talking. One conversation turns to the topic of hookups. Rob takes a second to call me out about the club again, and Damien pipes up about how I've been celibate in the hotel room. I roll my eyes when the other guys start ooo-ing and poking fun at my expense.

When the hell did my love life become so interesting?

Andre mentions that he hasn't seen me leave with a girl since I joined the team. Then, Rob says he saw me leave Slap Shots a couple of times with Petite Bartender. Patrick chimes in and says how surprised he is that I'm not hooking up with a different girl every night because of my reputation.

I finally pipe up. "Maybe I'm just trying to focus on the game right now."

I can tell Rob and Damien want to comment, but lucky for me, Chase steps in. "Hey, even playboys have to retire sometime."

He tips his glass to me, and I tip mine in return. At least I have someone on my side. I wonder what he'd think if he found out the real reason for my behavior change. I know he and Jenna are close. Would he be okay with it, or would he be pissed?

Rob gets a shit-eating grin on his face. Oh no, this can't be good. "Alright, retired playboy, who is she?"

Fuck! I shake my head and try to keep my expression neutral. "No one. There's no girl."

Rob guesses it's the bartender, saying she's the only one that makes sense.

Andre asks if it's true that I'm dating the bartender from Slap Shots.

If I play along, they'll leave me alone. But if that lie gets back to Jenna, I won't stand a chance with her.

I tell them the truth that I'm not dating the bartender or anyone else.

Damien shakes his head, narrowing his eyes at me. "I don't believe it. There has to be someone you're getting it from."

I shake my head and ignore him, taking a sip of my water. He continues, "Maybe it's Jenna."

I start choking on my water. Rob starts laughing. "Oooh, so is that it? Is easy redhead your type, T.J.?"

Christ, he means Jenna Davis. "Fuck no! I wouldn't touch her with a ten-foot pole!"

Everyone starts to laugh. Andre jokes, "Maybe it's Val."

Liam responds, "Oh, it's not her. She only has eyes for Chase."

Chase rolls eyes and grimaces. "I really wish she would fuck off."

Rob then guesses it's Lindsey, which earns him a glare from Liam and Chase. Liam then turns his glare to me. He's not serious right now, is he? "Dude, I'm not hooking up with your sister."

Damien makes a comment that ends up pissing me off. "Well, we all know it's not Taylor. So, that means it's a mystery lady."

I glance at him then quickly away as Liam adds, "Yeah, no way it's Taylor."

Why the hell does he sound so confident about that?

I barely have time to calm myself down when Rob speaks again. "Mmmm, Taylor. Now, she's a freakin prize, man."

I'm about to say something to shut Rob up, but Chase beats me to it. "Don't even think about it, dude!"

Rob smirks back at him. "Oh, I'm thinking about it. Won't act on it, but mmm, I'm thinking about it."

Liam throws a dinner roll at him. At this point, I'm pissed off and decide to spend the rest of dinner brooding. I may have accidentally spilled my drink in Rob's lap, though.

I hate knowing that some of the other guys have inappropriate thoughts about Jenna. I know I have no reason to be mad- I was just like them at one point, but now that I've developed feelings for her, the thought that someone else thinks of her in that way is irritating. It's inevitable, though, Jenna is incredibly beautiful; she's bound to have admirers everywhere she goes.

And now I have a new problem. The caveman inside me has already claimed her as his own, and he's very territorial.