The giant chicken
Thanks to KLigers98 for helping with this chapter. Check him out
Epsilon6666 and Ligers were teleported back into the room, one was sleeping while the other was waiting patiently. I'll let you guess which was which. View greeted the two people with a hum.
Ligers: Sup View also why the hell did you kick us out of the theater!
View continued to float around but turned to look at Liger.
View: You were simply too violent. Plus you would not have liked the universe I showed. Epsilon knows what I mean.
Ligers: Okay what was the universe based on?
View: Well, loosely, Fnaf.
When View said that Ligers eyes widened and paled a bit.
Ligers: Okay, I owe you an apology. Also like hell I want to see one of those crazy animatronics!
View floated over to the still asleep Epsilon and gave him a little shock. Epsilon jumped up and threw his sniper at view.
Ligers: Rise and shine bullseye.
Epsilon6666: Asshole. My aim is fine! Why else would I have this sniper?
Ligers thoughts: Probably to look badass in front of everyone.
Ligers said in his thoughts.
Ligers: I don't know trying to compensate for something and I don't know mean that!
Epsilon lowered his fist as ligers finished his sentence and leaned back in his chair.
Epsilon6666: Alright what's next? Can't be much worse then the last one.
Ligers: It's not but can you guess the next universe by what I say next?
When Ligers said that Epsilon was confused until Ligers spoke.
Ligers: It seems today that all you see.
Ligers then stops and waits for Epsilon's answer.
Epsilon begins to have an internal panic as he has no idea what to say
Epsilon6666: Uh, uh, shit ok. Uh, is giant chickens? Yes giant chickens.
Ligers: You are correct well half correct there is a giant chicken in this universe but please what am I talking about? If you can't guess, want me to reenact a scene from that universe?
Epsilon groaned and laid his head on his arms
Epsilon6666: Just roll the clip. I'm too tired for this shit right now. Because SOMEONE interrupted my nap.
Ligers: Okay and I was going to say Family Guy and man do I love Seth MacFarlane work.
Epsilon jumps out of his chair.
Epsilon6666: Wait! I remember the thing now! It seems today that all you see, is something something family's on tv! Yes! Perfect excited.
Ligers: Good to know you remember the show also guess what our favorite blond is doing in that universe?
Ruby looks up at the green haired boy.
Ruby: What's a Family Guy?
Ligers: You read Camp Camp right?
Weiss pressed her hands over Ruby's ears and glared at Liger.
Weiss: You be quiet!
Ligers: For Oum sakes she is going to see that not everything is a fairytale eventually. Also bite me semen hair!
Weiss: Why you!
Epsilon threw his sniper at Ligers but missed by a mile
Epsilon6666: FUCK! Also please just roll the clip view.
Ligers: Yay!
The movie starts and the screen shows a local shopping store where steps could be heard from the store. As the steps got louder the door to the store opens and shows our lovable blond Jaune Arc, dressed in winter clothing.
As Jaune was leaving the store he was greeted by a man in a chicken suit.
Chicken Man: Well, looks like someone's going to a big party tonight!
As the chicken man said that Jaune turned his head and looked at him.
Chicken Man: You should pick up a chicken strip party pack for all your friends!
The man in the chicken outfit said, making a chicken sound when he said pickup
Ruby: Is that a real chicken?
Weiss scoffed at her leaders naivety
Weiss: Of course not you dunce! It's just a man in a chicken costume
Blake but Weiss over the head
Blake: Or a Faunes!
Ligers: Uh Blake Faunus don't exist in that universe unless you count talking animals that can talk like people and walk like them?
Blake blushed in embarrassment and hid her face with her hands.
Velvet: We don't exist?
Sun: But we make everything better!
Ligers: Hey it's not all bad there are humans who dressed up as animals called furries.
Epsilon6666: Did you really have to mention furries? I was having a great day till now.
Ligers: Sorry dude my bad. How about animal people from anime?
Epsilon6666: That's better.
Mercury nudged his partner
Mercury: The hells anime?
Emerald shrugged.
Ligers: Okay how the hell does Roman know what anime is but not you two?
Mercury shrugged, and went back to looking at the so far uneventful screen.
Chicken Man: Here's a coupon.
The man in the chicken outfit said offering the coupon to Jaune only for him to shake his head no as well as waved his hands in response.
Jaune Arc: Woah, woah, look pal, I don't take coupons from giant chickens. Not after last time.
Jaune said bitterly which he then folded his arms and remembered that day he was given a coupon by a giant chicken.
When Jaune said that everyone was confused.
Ruby: Last time?
Nora: Did that coupon do something to Jaune Jaune! I'll kill it for him!
Ligers started to snicker a bit which caught attention from everyone.
Yang: The hell are you laughing about?
Ligers: Oh you will find out by the flashback we are about to see.
Epsilon seemed to wake from his coma and sat up, fully ready to laugh his ass off.
The screen then starts to fade and shows Jaune in another store, paying for his items.
Jaune Arc: Oh yeah, and that nice chicken outside gave me this coupon!
Jaune said with a smile on his face which then gestured to the chicken outside of the store who gave him the coupon for the store which he then handed it to the cashier.
Cashier: I'm sorry but this coupon is expired.
When the cashier said that Jaune then turned his head towards the giant chicken with rage.
Jaune Arc:You son of a!
Jaune said angrily which made the giant chicken have a look of shock which Jaune then jumps through the window and tackles the Giant Chicken to the ground.
The audience stared wide eyed at the screen
Roman: So, that escalated quickly.
Everyone agreed until they all heard Ligers shouting.
Ligers: CHICKEN FIGHT!
Epsilon jumped up next to Ligers.
Epsilon6666: Chicken fight!
Juniper looked up in worry for her son
Juniper: That must've hurt!
Ligers: Not really. I mean this Jaune is tough as hell.
When Ligers said that everyone went back to watching the screen.
As both Jaune and the Chicken got up from the ground. The Giant Chicken then immediately began to attack Jaune by punching him in the face while Jaune punched him back.
The Chicken then started to use his own beak to peck at Jaune's face. Jaune then managed to duck and which he then uppercutted the bird away from him.
Yang and Tai's eyes widened upon seeing how far Jaune launches the giant chicken
Tai: How much does he lift!
Yang. How hard is his punch!!
Ligers: Let just say he can punch really, really hard am I right Epsilon?
Epsilon6666: Yeah I mean some of the stuff he does doesn't seem very possible, but who am I to judge?
Ligers: Yep, also back to the screen!
As Ligers yelled everyone instantly went back to watching the screen.
Jaune then charges towards the bird but the giant chicken kicks Jaune in the face, which the chicken does it a second time until Jaune retaliates by striking the chicken in the face and proceeds to beat the bird with his fists.
Nora: yeah fearless leader! Kill that giant bird!
Ren: Nora....
Nora smiled.
Nora: Sorry Renny! Go fearless leader! Don't kill that giant bird!
Ligers: As I said before CHICKEN FIGHT!
Epsilon6666: CHICKEN FIGHT!
View sighed as he continued to float around
View: You humans and your weird fantasies and interests, I'll never understand them.
Ligers: You will eventually View anyway back to the FIGHT!
Everyone then went back to the screen and saw Jaune was handling the Giant chicken pretty well.
Jaune then punches the giant chicken towards the highway steps which the chicken ran then ran up the steps which Jaune followed him to continue the fight.
As the giant chicken was running up the steps Jaune managed to grab onto one of the Chicken's legs, causing the giant chicken to fall down. The giant chicken quickly got back up only for Jaune to repeatedly punch him in the face pushing the giant chicken back until the giant chicken started to use his beak again.
Blake: Wouldn't that hurt the chicken too? If he's really a man in a suit wouldn't that just be like head butting Jaune?
Ligers: Actually Blake, that's an actual giant chicken.
Neptune: Wait a minute, wait a minute! So there's no Faunes but there's just random giant chickens!
Ligers: No dumbass theirs also anthropomorphic animals as well.
Neptune looked at sun.
Neptune: I have so many questions!
Sun shrugged at his friend.
Sun: Does it matter? It's not like we'll see any of these Jaunes again right?
(That kids is what we call foreshadowing)
Epsilon6666: Famous last words. All I gotta say.
Ligers: Roadhouse?
Epsilon shrugged and looked back at the screen
Jaune manages the upper hand once more and continues his barrage of punches at the giant chicken which Jaune boxed him into the railing where he then punched the giant chicken so hard, that the giant chicken fell off the bridge and onto the street.
But luckily for the giant chicken he managed to land on the top of a truck which the giant chicken gave a false smile at Jaune and waved away from the angry blond.
Ligers: Lucky ass chicken am I right?
Roman: That thing should have died long ago!
Pyrrha: He just fell onto traffic! That's very lucky!
Ligers: Girl did you not see him land on the truck?
Pyrrha:smiled sheepishly.
Pyrrha: Well he basically fell into traffic, almost!
Ligers: Like I said before, lucky ass chicken now let see what the giant will do now friend will do now?
The giant chicken then sighs as it was all over until he sat up and turned around which his face changed to a look of pure shock and horror as Jaune somehow was on the next bridge away from him.
Jaune then runs from the other side of the bridge and leaps off it, landing on top of the chicken which both of them started to roll on the truck.
John: Son you better not die! I'll kick your ass if you do!
Juniper: John! Language!
As the fight was going on everyone smelled chicken and saw ligers was eating a bucket of chicken.
Ligers: What?
Epsilon walked over to Ligers.
Epsilon6666: You trying to give me a piece?
Ligers then nodded and gave Epsilon a drumstick.
Epsilon6666; Legend. Now back to the battle!
Jaune was on top of the bird again and started to punch him over and over until the bird grabbed Jaune's fist, mid punched and began to punch Jaune in the face over and over.
Ligers: Damn reversal!
Ozpin: well, how the tables have turned.
Qrow: Actuallyyyyyyy itzz how the turns have tabled you white haired weirrdoo, why is the world spinning?
Tai: Are you good Qrow?
Ligers: Dude your drunk man also how do you have alcohol?
Epsilon chuckles as he drinks from his own flask.
Epsilon6666: I've gotta provide for a brother in need!
Ligers: If he pukes in here I am blaming you.
Epsilon shrugs.
Epsilon6666: That's Fair.
It didn't last long as both Jaune and the giant chicken punched each other until the giant chicken pushed Jaune away from him which Jaune nearly fell off the truck but managed to grab onto a ladder on the back of the truck.
This caused the driver of the truck to casually turn his head to see on his rear view mirror what was going on. As the truck driver saw what was going he went back looking at the road where he saw he was about to run into a man by a folding bridge who was signaling to the truck driver to stop.
Ligers: Oh crap this does not look good.
Pyrrha: Oh my Oum! He's gonna hit that man!
Weiss: that idiot! Swerve!
Ruby covered her eyes.
Ruby: Please don't die!
Epsilon sighed as he sipped from his flask, rationing what was left.
Epsilon6666: Overreact much?
Ligers: What do you expect man. The girls like the blond.
Epsilon6666: really, what do they see in him? You know I'm not gonna judge.
Ligers: I was going to say he has a heart of gold but okay.
Epsilon shrugged and sipped the last of his drink and attempted to throw his flask into the trash but missed and hit Raven on the head.
Epsilon6666: Fuck! Wait actually bullseye!
Raven: What the! Why you! I'll kill you!
Ligers: Sit down slut or I put my foot where the sun doesn't shine.
Epsilon looked up in wonder.
Epsilon: I actually hit something, I'm so fucking badass!
Ligers: Indeed mate now back to the screen again!
The truck driver panicked and turned the wheel of his truck which the truck started to swerve. The man on the bridge then got out of the way and dodged but for the truck it kept skidding into the ascending road. As the truck continued to skid it was about to fall onto a nearby boat.
Ligers: Well shit.
Pyrrha: Jaune!! He better get out of there or I'm taking my anger out on you guys!
Velvet: Please be ok!
Ruby: Not again!
Ligers: Oh for the love of Oum.
Epsilon6666: you think they would have learned by now that Jaunes is pretty hard to kill. Burn him alive? He's fine. Scatter him into a million pieces? He's fine. Tear his soul down to the particle? He's fine.
Ligers: What my friend is saying Jaune is really resilient and if you are the reason he died he comeback to fuck you up.
Epsilon6666: That's the nicest way of saying it.
Lucky for the Jaune and the giant chicken, a passing helicopter was coming by near the scene. The giant chicken then grabs onto the landing skids, which Jaune then grabs onto the chicken as both of them escape as the truck falls on the boat and explodes on impact.
Roman: Okay how the hell are they that lucky that helicopter shows up when they are about to fall to their doom?
Ruby: I don't care as long as Jaunes is alive!
Goodwitch: It does seem all too convenient.
Ligers: I say the multiverse just like to surprise people.
Epslion6666: Or Fuck them over. I mean how bad is that fnaf universe? Answer is really bad.
Ligers: Yeah that is true but you fucked over you know who.
Summer: And who is you know who?
Ligers: Sorry love I am sworn to secrecy.
Tai: That seems a little extreme don't you think?
Ligers: Nope that's light compared to the rules us gods follow.
Epsilon6666: Wait there are rules?
Ligers: Yes there are rules. For example if a champion wants to visit a gods universe he or she must answer to him or her and not change anything unless otherwise.
Epsilon6666: Huh, you learn something new everyday. I've just been kinda doing whatever, probably why view hates me.
View flew by and zapped epsilon
View: Yes that's why!
Ligers: Really dude?
View went back to his place and watched the screen as it continued to play out.
As the helicopter flew away from the now burning boat it was now heading towards the city. Jaune gritted his teeth in determination to kick this chicken ass. Jaune then climbed up the chicken all the way up to his back. The giant chicken then sees Jaune and begins to jab him in the face with the back of his elbow.
Ligers: Ouch that's gotta hurt.
Saphron: That's some serious pain tolerance!
Roman snorted.
Roman: Try being a criminal for a day, that's nothing.
Ligers: Assmouth is correct criminals need to be sturdy to work in that profession.
Goodwitch: I don't think breaking the law is a profession.
Jaune managed to duck under the blows from the giant chicken and began to punch the fowl poultry in the ribs over and over.
All of a sudden Jaune stops punching the chicken as he saw they were both heading towards an office building right in front of them.
Ligers: Oh this is not good.
Ruby: Run Jaune run!
Nora: No! Fight Jaune fight!
Ligers just facepalms himself.
Ligers: How can Jaune run Ruby when he is holding on to the giant chicken which is holding on the helicopter.
Neptune: He could use that age old tactic, fight and flee! Wait, nevermind.
Sun hit him over the head
Sun: Idiot!
Ligers: Thank you Sun here have a banana bread for you telling Neptune he is an idiot as well as hitting him.
Epsilon's eyes widened when Ligers said banana bread.
Epsilon6666: So Sun, you trying to share that banana bread?
Sun hissed and began to run from Epsilon while eating the banana bread.
Ligers: Huh who knew the stereotypes that Monkeys like bananas also include monkey faunus.
Yang: Well Blake likes to be rubbed by the ears! And if you feed her fish she'll go crazy!
Ligers: Shit you should have said that earlier.
Ligers could be seen eating sushi and Blakes eyes widened and licked her lips.
Blake: MINE!
Blake then grabs Ligers sushi and runs away with it.
Ligers: Note to self don't bring fish into the theater.
As Ligers said that he went back to watching the screen.
The scene then changes to inside the office building where the people working having a casual conversation were unaware of the danger coming their way.
Office worker: I'm gonna need these by Friday.
Co-worker: Ooh, is that gonna give us enough time to cross check the-
The worker didn't get to finish as he was cut off by Jaune and the giant Chicken crashed through the windows, knocking both the workers out which both them stumbled around in the office space.
Ligers: Oh thank god!
Epsilon6666: You know I was kinda hoping that they crashed into the building and died. Would've been funny!
Neptune: Are you good my man? That's a little dark,
Epsilon shrugged.
Ligers: Please if you want dark how about killing a man with flaming farts.
Mercury spit out his drink
Mercury: What! How?
Ligers: Like this.
Ligers grabbed a lighter and aimed his rear towards Raven and farted and her hair caught on fire.
Yang subconsciously touched her hair.
Yang: I almost feel bad, almost.
Team STQR erupted into laughter as Raven screamed at View to put her out.
Raven: PUT IT OUT! SOME FUCKING PUT IT OUT!
As Raven said that she was hit by a water balloon and the fire went out.
Ligers: Happy Hoe?
Raven just glares at Ligers but goes back to her seat and watches the screen.
As everyone went back to watching the screen both Jaune and the giant chicken got up from the ground and went back to beating the hell out of each other. Jaune was managing to gain the upper hand by pushing the chicken back.
Nora: Yeah! Kick his ass Jaune!
Ren: Nora language!
Nora: Sorry Ren!
Ligers: Hey it was bound to happen sooner or later.
Pyrrha: Jaune will win! I know he can!
Ruby: You can do it Jaune!
Velvet: I believe in you!
Epsilon wipes a tear from his eye.
Epsilon6666: It's so wholesome!
Ligers: Yep.
Everyone then became silent and continued to watch the screen.
Jaune then grabbed the giant chicken by the waist and charged into a nearby wall, crashing into another room which was a photocopying room.
Jaune Arc then grabs the giant chicken by the head and slams his head onto the photocopier. The Giant Chicken tried to fight off and escape only for Jaune to grab the scanner and proceeded to slam it onto the bird's head. Jaune repeatedly slammed the copier onto his head over and over, until the bird was bleeding with papers coming out of the copier, showing off the results of the damage and let me tell yeah it was not pretty.
Ligers: Uh overkill much or it's just me?
Epsilon6666: Have you seen some of my chapters?
Ligers: I have but still it's pretty overkill I mean damn.
Epsilon6666: Yeah, overkill.
Mercury winces as Jaune slams the copier on the giant chicken's head.
Mercury: Brutal! That's gotta hurt!
Emerald: No shit Sherlock!
Cinder: Such killer intent! Is this what we have to do to get our Jaune arc to snap?
Epsilon smiles a weird smile and leans back in his chair and begins to talk to himself.
Epsilon6666: Oh they have no idea do they? There in for a surprise, I don't even think Ligers knows!
Ligers: Cinder if you try to do anything to your Jaune in your universe you are going to face hell and I don't mean figuratively I mean there was one Jaune who came back from hell to punish all you fuckers for betraying him.
Coco: Dam, that's some determination if I've ever seen it.
Ligers: Trust me you will be surprised how determined Jaune's are when they put a goal in their heads and let me tell you it's pretty inspiring and at the same time scary.
Jaune then stops and let's go of the giant chicken, letting the son of bitch drop to the ground which Jaune then walks away from the spot as the fight is over. Jaune then walked out of the hole as the onlookers watched in shock.
Jaune Arc: Chicken...*Jaune breathing*Gave me a bad coupon-Argh!"
Jaune's sentence was cut off as he was tackled from behind by the Giant Chicken who was still alive and ready for more.
Ligers: Shit sneak attack!
Tai: the disrespect!
Ozpin:the cheapest yet most effective form of attack.
Ligers: This is a street fight so there are no rules.
Winter: Still each fight should respect one and other.
Ligers: True but if it's life and death then anything goes so yeah.
Jaune was struggling as the chicken was on his back. Jaune was trying to get the chicken off by knocking him over a few desks. He was struggling to get him off.
As the both Jaune and the Chicken continued to fight they both accidentally collided with a window causing it to break which causes both of them to fall off the building.
Ligers: Well damn they are going to die.
Ruby: No Jaune!
Yang: where's the helicopter when you need it?!
Pyrrha: He can't die! It's been funny so far!
Velvet: something has to save him!
Jaune started screaming as well as the chicken who was clucking instead of screaming as both of them fell to their doom. Jaune then closed his eyes once as they collided to the ground. Luckily for Jaune though he manages to survive the fall by using the chicken's body as cover when they landed, killing the giant chicken in the process.
Ligers: Smart move blondie.
Pyrrha: Oh thank god!
Blake winced at the body of the chicken
Blake: That's brutal!
Weiss: Well the chicken was trying to kill him, it's only fair!
Roman: A truly good street fight! I liked this one!
Jaune slowly gets up from the body of the giant chicken and wipes his lip. Jaune Arc smiles as he was victorious for killing the giant chicken. Jaune then gets off the body of the giant chicken and starts walking away from it. Jaune Arc then walked towards the sunset. His fight with the lying Chicken was over. As he was, victorious.
The screen then turned to the body of the giant chicken...whose eye suddenly shot open, signifying he was alive. The chicken then glared at the Arc boy leaving and vowed to get him someday.
Ligers: Well damn the chicken still alive.
Goodwitch: How? That thing fell from such a high height!
Ren: There's no way it would survive that!
Ligers: Yep and the giant chicken didn't even have aura.
Ironwood: Incredible.
Ligers: Ironwood If you plan on making a giant chicken to fight the Grimm I am saying you're crazy.
Ironwood ignored Ligers and continued to think of an army of giant chickens.
The movie then ends and the screen fades into darkness.
Ligers: Well since the movie ended I better get going but before I leave here is a video of Raven getting it on with a tentacle monster.
As Ligers said that the screen showed what he said and everyone just stared.
Ligers: See you later guys!
As Ligers was about to leave Raven tried to pounce on him only to fail as Ligers left via portal. Raven was now on the ground and was very pissed until she heard herself moaning in on the screen and everyone was just staring which made her scream at everyone.
Raven: Everyone stop watching that version of me have sex with a tentacle monster!
END
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