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Chapter 30 " He Just Wants To Love Himself. "

" 6 Weeks Of Doing Anything Is A Pain In The Ass, But Six Weeks Of Touring Is Like Being Stabbed In The Eyes For Six Weeks. "

- Corey Taylor






I snapped the picture with my camera towards Roger before he looked at me in curiosity.

" Wh - What Did You Just Take A Picture Of, Love? "


I chuckled and gave him a dashing look, before taking the print out and flashing it before him on the airplane table. He narrowed his eyes in embarrassment.


We were sitting on a table facing each other directly on our tour plane, off to America, a long, long way away. 

Roger never liked plane flights, much less travelling or tours, so I tried to make him feel better by acknowledging his beauty.



" You - The Most Gorgeous Little Thing... " I smiled - but he scrunched his nose up and turned the picture towards me. " That's What You  See. "  he said softly and looked out of the plane window.

I hesitated.


" W - Well..What Do...You See..? " 

We eyed each other for about 2 seconds before he looked back outside and didn't reply. 





~













When we got into our hotel room for the next few days, after a long night of flying, Roger plummeted onto the bed, stretching himself out and mumbling tiredly.

" Tired, My Prince? " was the first thing I had said to him in a while.


He paused, blushed, and nodded.

So I sat beside him and stroked his slowly rising and falling back back as he lay, looking away from me, dug into the white, soft sheets. " I Dont Like Sleeping When I Could Be Doing Better Things. " he sighed grumpily.

I chuckled. " Like What? "


Rogers P O V

I turned over as I said; " Cuddling Up With You. " I shyly pouted, biting my dry bottom lip. Brian's smirk stayed on to my suprise.


" And Who Says You Can't "

" My Personality. " I groaned and rolled back again. I could feel Brian's build deflate into the sheets. I knew his smile was off now. I didn't know why i didn't feel bad about doing that.


Slowly, two arms wrapped around my shoulders. 


" Having A Grumpy Day? Thats Okay. If You Dont Want Me Near You I Can Stay Somewhere Else For Tonight Or.. "


I felt my eyes get steamy and my hands, quivering, clutch the bedcase.


" No.. " i whispered shakily. 


" Don't Do That. " 


Brian always knew when I was about to have a cry, and so he rested his handsome head on my shoulder and advised me to let it all out. I refused.

" I - I Dont Want To - To..Upset..You.. " I battled weakly, biting my lip to resist the tears. " I Cry T - Too Much A - And Im A Grown..F - Fucking M - Man.. "


He ever so gently rolled my body over, and towards him. I was so small and fragile compared to him - so different. I didnt see why he liked me, really.


" Shh, Shh. " he cooed in a tender tone. " Its Okay. Nobody's Here. They Won't See. "


I shivered and gripped onto him like he was a life ring in the sea. 


" What About The Paparazzi? " I crooned softly, in a whisper. " They Got The Truth Themselves Last Time. They're Better At Finding Than Us At Keeping. "

He said the same.

" Shh, Shh. " once again. " It's Fine. Tears Are Better Out Than In, In That Context. "

I felt myself swallow my sadness and I began to lose my control over it.


 My voice started to tearfully tremble, and streaks of tears ran down my cheeks. I didnt like the sound of my voice when i cried; i thought i sounded like a baby, so i pressed my lips together and refused to make no sound but upset hums. 


" Oh, My Love. " Brian cooed, taking me in his arms. " My Poor Boy. Its Not Fair, Is It? Touring, Travelling...It Isn't Fun, Is It? "

I shook my head and throated a babyish " N - No..! " as i continued to sob.


" Is That Why You're Sad? " my boyfriend whispered gently, his thumb stroking my chin. I thought internally -

" I Have More Than Just One Reason To Be Sad All The Time. '

I glanced at myself in a nearby mirror, at my weakened body, and scrunched my nose up. I knew i had to tell a small lie so Brian wouldn't have to worry about me. I felt myself tense but i stopped my tears.


" Y - Yeah.. " i sighed, my face against his upper neck, and he smiled. " It's Okay. You're Okay, I'm Okay. We're Okay, Rog. "


I laid my head away and looked up at the ceiling, frowning thoughtfully. 

" Its Okay If You're Not Okay Though. " he quoted, stroking my cold - sweated forehead. I tensed stiffly and exhaled. 

I could feel his eyes watching me closely, examining my stance, letting me know at least he cared. 


" Tell Me When You're Ready. " he said, and cuddled me up with him, finally concluding the silence. " Im All Ears, Whenever You Need Me. "


Brians P O V 

" I Love You Alot. " he blubbed out of the blue, and turned to face me, trying to smile for me. His attempts were hard to watch, but i smiled, resisting his pain upon me.

" My Love, " i smirked. " I Love You More Than The World Itself. If I Can Promise You One Thing, It Is That. " 


He nodded, accepting my statement.

" Thank You. " he said slowly and pulled my collar towards him so he could peck a kiss onto my thin lips. His affection worked well on the two of us, and soon we were dozing off in eachothers tender, loving and caring builds.



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