Izaya woke up with a groan, his head was pounding and everything seemed to spin. Getting up he faintly noticed the blankets covering his shaking body. He was on the couch, he never slept on the couch, why was he here? Standing up send a wave of pain all through his left leg. "Ugh," he groaned, falling back on the couch only for his ribs to painfully protest. Putting a hand to his aching chest images of what had happened the day before flashed before his eyes. Shizuo was dead...Shizuo was death? Izaya felt something slide down his right eye. Bringing a hand up, he noticed it was a tear. Why was he crying, he should be happy, after all it is something he had strived to do since they met, had he not! However, he could only feel emptiness, he wasn't feeling accomplished or even remotely satisfied. Emptiness, that's all he felt. Taking in a shaky breath he stood up again on a wobbly leg, holding his breath he slowly limped to were his computer sat at his desk, a quiet whimper escaping his lips every once in awhile. Finally reaching his desk he gently sat down on his chair, relaxing. He was so concentrated on his own thoughts he didn't notice somebody coming out of his kitchen until they were in front of him. "Hey," the person said, getting caught off guard Izaya moved fast, taking out a pocketknife and putting it to the person's throat. The quick movement made Izaya drop the pocketknife in pain, his ribs feeling as if they were pulling apart. "Ugh," Izaya groaned quietly. The person came into focus and he noticed it was Kadota, Dotachin, the one that stood before him with a worried glance. "Izaya, are you okay? You should not be moving around too much." Kadota whispered gently sitting Izaya back on the chair. "Let me be, I don't need your help," Izaya mumbled pushing the hands away. Deciding to send all thoughts about Shizuo away he immediately smirked. "Hello, Dotachin. It's nice to see you coming to visit, how have you been?" Kadota frowned putting his hands in his pockets before looking out the window. "Shizuo died." His voice sounded monotone as if he had no feelings whatsoever. Izaya started laughing, his cold emotionless laughter consuming the silence as he panicked inside, still trying to keep all thoughts of Shizuo closed. "Finally! That monster is finally Dead!" he yelled throwing his hands up before spinning on his chair to look out the window. He smiled, but his eyes held no emotion. "Now that there is no monster around I can focus on my precious humans, isn't this a great day?" he sang, glancing to where Kadota still stood. His face showed no indication of hearing him. "Why?" Izaya was startled. "Why are you always like this Izaya?" Kadota continued, "I know that you and Shizuo didn't get along, but why do you never care, why do you keep hiding behind the same mask?" Kadota turned toward Izaya a pleading look in his eyes, but an expressionless face. "Izaya, Shizuo is dead, how do you truly feel?" Kadota kept staring at Izaya for a couple of seconds before walking towards the kitchen and going in. Izaya was left speechless. Izaya slowly got back up from his chair, he couldn't stay here any longer, he needed to get away. First Shinra now Kadota. What had he done wrong?! Moving as painlessly and as soundlessly as he could he grabbed his jacket and went out the door, quickly calling a taxi. Meanwhile, Kadota came out the kitchen with a plate of ootoro, a glass of water and two vitamins. Kadota stopped by the desk putting the food down only to start looking around. "Izaya?" he asked. Nothing, everything was quiet. "Izaya?! Where are you?" He yelled but again no response. Panicking a little now he started going towards the stairs when he noticed Izaya's coat was missing. "Shit," he muttered under his breath, quickly pulling out his phone he dialed a number. Praying for the person to answer he went outside, starting to walk towards where Saburo, Erika and Walker were chatting. "Hello, Shinra speaking how may I help you?" Shinra finally answered. "Shinra, I lost Izaya, while i went to get him food he disappeared, I don't know where he's at," Kadota spoke loudly, so the others could also hear. Saburo got the message and quickly started the car, the other two going in. "What? How did he even escape! Kadota you need to find him, hsi lung is still not well, it got pierced, if he moves a lot the wound might reopen and he might die, I'll sent Celty out to look for him, please find him." Shinra ranted, worry evident in his voice. He had decided not to tell that to Izaya because knowing him he would have overexerted himself only to prove him wrong. Hanging up Shinra turned to a worried Celty. "Celty, Izaya's missing we need to find him." Celty nodded but pulled out her PDA, "but what about..." "Don't worry Celty, I'll stay behind, just be careful, okay?" Shinra interrupted hugging her before walking to a room at the back. Celty was startled, Shinra would usually yell how much he loved her, but since they discovered Izaya and Shizuo a week ago, he had changed, he was quieter now. Shaking the thoughts out of her mind, Celty walked outside. She will find Izaya.

>Izaya's POV<

I stumbled out of the taxi, my ankle was pounding and breathing had become really hard. Looking at the building in front of me I could barely make out a black dot as the entrance, everything was blurry. Struggling with all my strength I started to limp towards the door. I didn't know why I had come here, I was sure, now, that I had gone crazy. "I'm gonna get myself killed," I whispered under my ragged breaths. A loud screech from my left told me a car had arrived. I tried glancing to my left when I remembered my hood was up, covering my view. "Izaya?" I recognize that voice. "Sh...Shiki." Fuck, I stuttered, now he'll know something is wrong. I looked towards my feet, trying but failing to take a breath. Why was it so hard to breath?! "Izaya, what's wrong?" Shiki asked, now standing in front of me. I tried setting up a smirk or some kind of mask up but my ankle and ribs were killing me, not to mention I couldn't breath at the moment! "I..." I couldn't talk...Trying to take another deep breath I felt somebody grab my hin and gently pull my head up to look at them. Shiki had an expressionless face, but his eyes showed worry. On any normal day I would have laugh and taunted him, but today I actually welcomed his worried expression. Taking a hand to my chest I tried to take a deep breath only to start coughing. Shiki seemed even more worried now and in a swift movement I felt myself being picked up. "S..." nothing else came out of my mouth. Giving up I rested my head against his shoulder and focused on my breathing. After a minute my vision cleared and my breathing was back to normal. "Shiki, I can walk you know," I whispered, but made no move to push him away. Shiki scoffed, "Yeah, right with a broken ankle and ribs, I don't think you Izaya." I was shocked at hearing this, "who told you?" I needed to know. "Shinra called sounding worried, explained everything to me said to call back if I saw you but I don't think that to be wise." I felt grateful at this, at least I wouldn't be bothered by the crazy doctor. "However, you will be staying here until you recover, wouldn't want my best informant to die, now would I." I smirked before pouting and hugging him. "Awww, that the only reason, you wound me Shiki." Shiki chuckled before putting me down on a couch. "Shush Izaya now tell me, how do you feel?" I stared, "What do you mean?" Shiki shook his head before rubbing his forehead and sitting next to me. "Shinra told me, Shizuo died." No! I don't want to talk about this. "I feel fine, happy even, why did you thought I would be sad~" Shiki looked at me before grabbing my hands and holding them in his looking me in the eye. "Izaya you know you can tell me anything just as I can tell you anything, right?" I nodded. "Izaya, how do you feel?" He asked in a voice so soft I felt my walls breaking. "I..." I didn't know how I felt, I only knew my chest hurt at the thought of never seeing Shizuo again. My throat dried up and my eyes started to sting. "I...I don't know," I said honestly. My eyes started to sting again and before I knew it a wet substance started sliding down my cheeks. "I don't know." I repeated. Shizuo had always been there since high school, and now he was just...gone. "I...I don't kn..ow." I repeated again. Shiki looked at me with sad eyes before hugging me to his chest. That was the last straw. Letting go of all my feelings and letting my walls fall down I let my tears fall. "Why...Shiki, I don't understand why did he die. Will...will I ever se...e him again?" My tears fell faster. Blond hair, caramel brown eyes and a contagious smile. Shizuo was invincible nothing could kill him, so WHY?! I hugged Shiki harder. I knew i looked pathetic right now but I didn't care, all i cared about right now was getting answers. "I'm sorry Izaya, you'll ...never get to see Shizuo again." Shiki whispered. I cried harder. How could a person disappear so easily. Shizuo why did you leave me? Were you not supposed to kill me? Was I not supposed to be killed by your hand? I felt my eyes getting heavy as my mind started to shut down and in my last moments of consciousness I muttered four simple yet painful words. "Shizuo, I love you."