Chris: *looks at Lucifer blankly* Can you stop?

Angelo: *hugging his legs with his face smooshed up against his ass* Stop what?

Chris: Biting my ass.

Angelo: *raises an eyebrow* Bitch. This is my ass. *buries his face in his ass*

Chris: *deadpans* Lucifer get your husband!

Lucifer: I don't control him. He's his own person or whatever. 

~~~~~~~~

Lucifer: *pulls Chris into his lap* Why are you so cold with us?

Chris: I don't know what you mean.

Max: Dad!

Chris: *gets out of lucifer's lap and smiles at him* Hi baby.

Max: Can you babysit Amelio for me? I'm taking Jerry and Coal on a date!

Chris: Of course baby!

Lucifer: Bruh.

~~~~~~~~

Faz: Why haven't you married them yet?

Chris: I've only dated them for like 2 months.

Faz: It's been way longer then that! *laughs*

Chris: *stares at him confused* What.

Alex: It's been a while da. You just don't have any concept of time, always in that forest of yours.

Chris: .. Oh.