There's a Niall pov, it doesn't show much but there'll be another Niall POV soon and tbh it fucked me up while writing it okay.

There's also a Spencer POV (that's him up there) hopefully it'll explain a few things as to why he's so angry at Harry and stuff. Gotta cut him some slack yo 😛

Happy Reading xx

t.m.

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N I A L L 👽

   "I just want to thank everyone for coming here today. It means a lot. It means that you all are taking one step towards healing yourselves and learning to be happy again," Jade spoke with a hint of nervousness in her tone, sky blue eyes making eye contact with everyone in the room.

  Today was the first day of her support group idea. I didn't expect many people to turn up, but loads of people did. Some people were there just to help Jade with organizing the support group, such as Dexter, Liam, and Damien. People actually attending the support group was Harry, Louis, Spencer and I. We were the people most affected by Scarlett's death, I would probably be the person least affected out of the four.

   "I am by no means a professional, but I am here for every single one of you. Here to comfort you and help you get through this, here to let you know that you are not alone. We all have one thing in common and that is grieving for the death of Scarlett," Jade spoke softly, eyes darting between each one of us hesitantly.

  We were all quiet, none of us making eye contact with Jade as she spoke to us. Harry had his tatted arms folded, sitting in the single armchair silently as he looked down onto his lap. Spencer and Louis whom sat together also had their gazes averted. I sat in my wheelchair, the only one actually paying full attention to Jade as she spoke. I could feel her anxiety radiated off of her next to me.

  Her hands were shaking slightly as she smiled nervously, but the awkward tension between all of us was just too much. Damien entered the room from the kitchen just as Jade paused to take a breath, carrying a tray of baked goods on it and setting it onto the coffee table. His thick brows furrowed when he noticed Jade's unusual nervous expression. He sighed heavily sitting down next to her, before parting his lips to speak.

   "I know some of you may think Jade is just being an annoying mother, nagging you about how she's there for you and etc. But seriously guys, she's just trying to help, we all are," Damien spoke, earning the attention of Louis and Spencer. Harry only flickered his gaze towards Damien and Jade before looking away.

   "What if we don't want help?" Spencer spoke up, his gaze cold and icy.

   "Then you're free to leave," Jade spoke in a slightly louder tone, a hint of annoyance in her words. She knew Spencer didn't want to be here because Harry was here.

   "Good, because I don't think I want to sit in on a support group for Scarlett's death, when her murderer is in it too," Spencer spoke lowly, his voice dripping with venom as he spoke his words indirectly referencing to Harry. Jade snapped, standing up with her eyes narrowed at him.

   "Spencer, stop it," she flared up, as I gripped my sides of my wheelchair nervously. Nervous because I was about to watch something big unfold before me.

   "Stop what? I'm allowed to speak freely aren't I? This is a support group after all?" Spencer sneered sarcastically, as Damien's expression held annoyance.

   "Yeah a support group, does the word 'support' mean nothing to you?" Jade argued back. "You and Louis both need to stop this!"

   "Stop what? Blaming the murderer for a death he committed. It's his fault she's gone!" Spencer exclaimed, causing Harry to snap now.

   "Fuck off Spencer! You think I wanted this to happen? I tried to save her okay; I tried! I just couldn't. So stop blaming me for her death, you stupid fuck!" Harry yelled angrily, his piercing green eyes glaring furiously at Spencer as they both stood in front of each other ready to rip one another apart.

   "Harry-" Damien called out in order to stop this upcoming fight, but he was too late when Spencer swung his fist at Harry.

  I watched in horror as Harry let out a low growl before pouncing onto Spencer, knocking him to the ground. They continued to yell at each other as Harry's fists flew at Spencer face, delivering punch after punch. The sickening sound of Harry's punches filled the air as blood started to pour out of Spencer's nose, a cry of pain flying out of his lips.

   "You should've died instead!" he screamed at Harry, pushing against his chest but Harry's hands were clasping Spencer's neck way too firmly for him to budge.

   "You know what? I fucking tried okay! I fucking tried to die, but it didn't work!" Harry roared back, his words incredibly loud and full of heart-wrenching pain, everybody's jaw in the room dropped.

   "W-What?" Spencer gasped in surprise, and due to the way Harry's fingers were wrapped around his neck.

  Harry couldn't continue after Spencer's response when Damien and Dexter immediately jumped in to grab Harry by his arms and pull him off Spencer. Harry struggled immensely, screaming and kicking like a child, crying too. Spencer was surprisingly quiet, blood trickling down from his nose as he held onto Louis for support, staring at Harry with wide eyes.

   "You tried to kill yourself?" Spencer whispered in shock, wide blue eyes gazing at Harry whom was crying softly.

   "Yes," he cried. "I know, I'm so pathetic I couldn't even kill myself!" he cried in pain, letting out another sob after that. Spencer's face immediately softened, pity, guilt and sympathy swirling amongst the blue hues of his eyes as he was left mouth agape by Harry's words. We all were.

   "I loved her, Spencer. I would have killed for that girl, and died for her, just like she did for me. She was my everything, and I know I fucked up. But God, I'm tired of apologizing for something I didn't do," he sighed harshly at the end, struggling against Damien and Dexter once again. "Let me go!" he snapped, his face flushed with anger and pain as Damien and Dexter finally let go of him.

  He stormed out of the room, leaving everyone speechless as to what had just happened.

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S P E N C E R ⛓

  It had been two hours since Harry and I had that fight, and my heart still felt heavy with guilt. When Harry confessed that he tried to commit suicide, my heart fell in my chest so quickly I regretted every single thing I had ever said to him about Scarlett's death. After Harry stormed off, I forced Jade and Damien to tell me more about his suicide attempt and the exact reasons for it.

  The guilt and regret hit me harder when they told me that he's been having hallucinations and hearing voices that told him everything was his fault. He also had a dream of Scarlett, which I assumed was what finally pushed him to attempt suicide. Either way, I felt utterly guilty and remorseful of what I said to him.

  The guilt was eating and pestering me as I sat on my sofa, thinking about all this while I held a cloth to my bleeding nose. My whole face was sore from the beatings I had received from Harry. I truly deserved them though. I shouldn't have blamed him in the first place. That was probably my biggest flaw, I always blamed people for my mistakes, or for things that they don't deserve to have the blame put on them.

  It was probably my words that day when he came back without Scarlett, which triggered the hallucinations and voices and messed with his head more than it was meant to. I never wanted him to actually believe them; I never thought he would take them that seriously. I thought that he was in the right mindset to understand that it wasn't his fault and that I was just being an angry prick. But instead, my words manipulated him into thinking that everything was indeed his fault.

  I sighed for the hundredth time, this time in slight relief as the bleeding had stopped. I trudged to the bathroom, turning the faucet to allow the water flow onto the bloodstained cloth. The water turned pink as I mindlessly cleaned the cloth, flashes of the events that happened earlier still appearing in my head. Deciding to take a shower, I stripped myself down and entered the shower box.

  As the almost scalding hot water streamed down my body, I ran my fingers through my short blonde hair, reminiscing back to the last conversation I had with Scarlett. It was about Harry himself. I couldn't help but question her on the guy because it had been ages since Scarlett had been with someone since that prick Zayn.

   "But are you sure you love him?" I asked her one last time, grinning cheekily when she rolled her eyes and punched my shoulder.

   "Shut up Spencer. I'm sure," she shook her head with laughter, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as she stared into the distance.

  We were sitting on top of a grassy hill near the Woodlawn Cemetery. I had gone with Scarlett to visit her dad's grave two nights before the big mission where The Organization were gonna attack Black Arrow's temporary base. It was around midnight by the time we decided to walk up to the grassy hill and sit on the top, gazing at the stars, which was sprinkled over the ebony sky.

   "But I heard he treated you like shit at the start, and you let him!" I retaliated with a frown, even though I knew the reason why she let him."Why?"

   "I know," she sighed. "I can't really give excuses but I was weak-minded at the time. Dad had died, and I was just in this harsh new environment where it took time to adjust to," she told me quietly, tugging at a few blades of grass while she reminisced back to those days she was a newbie.

   "Makes sense," I commented.

   "With Harry," she continued quietly. "He was a pain in the ass majority of the time. But Spencer, whenever I had my nightmares, or whenever I just cried he always turned into this completely new person. He'd be sweet and caring at night, and then the next morning he'd be all rude and harsh. It was confusing as fuck!" she exclaimed, gazing at me with wide eyes.

   "But how on earth did you have the patience to tolerate that? Like Jesus, it must've taken you a while to wait until he just changed himself," I spoke, leaning back on the palms of my hands as I stared at her.

   "Honestly, I don't even know. I just had hope, even though it was diminished half of the time. It was still there. I just really believed he could change, and he did," she said with a soft smile playing on her lips.

  I simply nodded in response, knowing that this was exactly what Scarlett tried to do with Zayn years ago. Yet her efforts always seemed to go to waste when he'd randomly find himself in bed with another woman, while I would be holding Scarlett in my arms while she bawled her eyes out at the news. The first time Zayn cheated on her, I went ballistic. Nobody was allowed to mess with my bestfriend like that. I was ready to break that pretty little face of his, but Scarlett wouldn't allow me. She was just so determined to change him, she put up with him for about five years until she learnt that you couldn't always change someone no matter how hard you try, unless that person wanted to change themselves. In this case, it looked like Harry too wanted to change himself, but I think that was just for Scarlett rather than himself.

   "Yeah unlike Zayn," I muttered to her previous words, causing a light scowl to appear on her face.

   "Zayn, no matter how hard I tried he just didn't want to change. I hate that it took me so long to realize that," she sighed sadly, as if she was unhappy she didn't get to change Zayn for the better even though they weren't together anymore.

   "You tried your best Scarlett. He just manipulated you into thinking that it was working and he was progressing," I told her firmly, as she shuffled closer and put her head on my shoulder.

  We sat quietly, gazing up at the stars and at the luminous city of Las Vegas far ahead. I thought back to how different our lives were months ago, how I was a dealer and Scarlett was trying to get her masters degree in Chemistry, while being a drug manufacturer at the same time. Our lives then seemed drastically different to the way they were now, and even then we thought our lives were different, with all the drug dealing and whatnot. We had come a long way to where we were now, one of us an assassin, while the other a chemist.

   "Imagine if my Dad was never murdered and therefore I never would've known about his assassin life," she spoke her thoughts aloud, as I leaned my head against hers, throwing my arm around her shoulder.

   "You never would've been forced into this assassin thing."

   "I never would've met Harry," she said thoughtfully, chewing her bottom lip.

   "Yeah, you would've probably dated another prick let's be real," I joked, causing her to roll her eyes at me again, elbowing me in the ribs.

   "I always get attracted to the bad ones," she scoffed at herself.

   "Yeah but you always tried to make them good, and it worked this time," I told her with a smile, triggering her own wonderful one.

   "It did indeed," she grinned toothily as she thought about her lover. "He tells me he changed because he loves me and wants to be what I deserve."

    "Well that's what you want, isn't it?"

   "Yeah, but I've always wanted him to change for himself, not for me," she explained.

   "Hey, at least he changed. Kudos to that," I raised my eyebrows at her, making her nod and smile slightly.

   "What do you think of him?" she asked me suddenly with a curious grin, eyes lighting up as I let a groan.

   "Does it even matter?"

   "Of course it does! You're my bestfriend! Your opinion matters to me a lot!"

   "Fine. At first I was kinda skeptical, because after the last few boyfriends you've had, including Zayn, I felt like Harry was just one of them," I began to tell her, holding my hand up when she tried to interrupt to defend Harry. "But after observing you two for a few days, the way he treats you and looks at you, and all that, had me thinking 'wow she really did find the one'"

   "Really?" she grinned widely, her eyes lighting up.

   "Yeah. I mean, he makes you happy and that makes me happy, and by the looks of it, he ain't going anywhere," I told her, a grin pulling at my lips as she smiled back at me.

   "I'm glad you like him Spencer."

   "He did get me a job after all," I said, causing her jaw to drop.

   "But it was my idea!"

   "But he made it happen!" I retaliated with a laugh, causing her to huff, nevertheless burst out laughing softly.

  She pulled me into a warm embrace, squeezing my shoulders lightly as she sighed. I hugged her back, more than happy to have her back by my side again after those terrible lonely months without her. She was the only person I could count on for anything, having her by my side with my throughout my whole life would be a blessing. Calling her my best friend was already one. I hoped Harry knew how lucky he was to have her.

  The memory of my last conversation with Scarlett left me smiling to myself in sorrow. My best friend was gone and it hurt me. Deep down inside, I knew that with me blaming Harry for Scarlett's death, Scarlett herself would be disappointed in me. More than disappointed, angry too. I couldn't help it, I was just angry too. Angry that she had died under Harry's watch. Harry Styles, the man who said he'd protect her no matter what. But now I understood that mistakes happen, even this was a fucking huge one. He couldn't do anything, and that was unfortunate but I couldn't hate him for that.

  Once I stepped out of the shower, I made the decision to go and apologise to Harry, and have a talk with him. I could only pray this would go well.

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💀 how did y'all like this chapter? What do you think of Spencer? I don't know what it feels like but I can't imagine what if feels like to lose your bestfriend like that 💔

💀 so I hope that flashback helps you guys understand why Scarlett pretty much let Harry emotionally abuse her a lot. She puts bettering other people before herself, so she would kind of go through whatever it takes to change someone. Her determination for this could be a good and bad thing 😂

💀 sOoo many people have already guessed the whole freaking book already and I'm like pissed 😂😂😂 like is it that obvs smh. GUESS I'LL JUST MAKE NEW PLOT TWISTS AND MAYBE KILL SOMEONE OFF 😈😈😈

Jk

maybe 😏😏

Until we meet again...

t.m.