I knew, healing feels lonely.
But, it's even tougher than it seems.
Everytime just when it seems that
There's only a millimeter left
To become finally free
From the limbo of thoughtless thoughts...
With just a flick, just a whim -
The next moment,
I'm clueless, again.
Stuck in the relentless, ugly loop.
It stinks.

In my childhood, I heard something
Often in my drawing class -
"Trust the process."
There are some stages
While creating a piece of art,
When the work looks awful.
And, those are the times
When the most important skill
Is the ability to 'trust'.
Trust that the stages of development,
Are gonna lead to an eventual beauty.
As I dare to call myself an art enthusiast...
"Not trusting the process" -
Can still never be an option for me.

The loop will eventually become weak.
The loop will eventually break.
I will make it happen.
After all, I've done it countless times
On canvas.