Imma do this cuz "why not?".

Dear ex,
Thank god I don't have one!

Dear self,
Honey, you need higher self esteem. Just sayin. Also, side crunches and sit ups.

Dear dad,
This dad = best dad. Thank you for helping me get into Marvel and DC.

Dear mom,
YOU'RE FANTABULOUS!!

Dear crush,
BOTH OF YALL ARE JUST TOO PERFECT, YOU GUYS BREATHING EVEN GIVES ME FANGIRL FEELS!!1! *ahem* Sorry.

Dear sibling,
Please don't tease me about my liking of anime when you clearly have a Big Bang Theory addiction.

Dear Past me,
Okay, I get that we've made some friends out here, but wHY DID YOU SAY "YES" WHEN YOU WERE ASKED IF YOU WANTED TO MOVE?! Other than the friends, you've been god damned homesick and depressed for 3 years!!

Oh wait, I remember... Your mom and stepdad were miserable back home... And your sweet heart gave in.

Dear first love,
STOP BUGGING THEO'S DAMN CHICKENS!! YOU HAVE YOUR OWN!!

Dear future me,
Are we thin yet? Or living back home yet?

Dear best friend,
So many inside jokes, so many people who are more lost than the people on LOST

Dear future child,
(No matter how I had you, whether it'd been from adoption or from the shwing and shwong), You are precious, and I love you. Though you can be a little troublemaker, I'll always be there to protect you through life's hardships.

Dear person I love,
*Zone outs and little-girl giggles* Sorry, I just thought of cute fluff.

Dear person I hate,
Let me make this short and sweet. *ahem*

Learn your fucking place in this world or else life will have no problem eating you up and shitting you out. You can't walk around life think you're hot shit and expecting everyone to bow down to you because, guess what princess? Life's gonna shit on you if you continue to think this way.

Have a nice day, please drive through.

Dear ex best friend,
...I was your moral support after she dumped you. I stayed up with you until 2 am helping you decide whether or not you should go to a good high school that offered you an art scholarship and what do you when you flip schools?! You block everyone who went to the old school, so- *two birds flying high*

Dear person who hates me,
Where do I begin? Oh-
-Every kid at school hates your guts
-You're a prissy, stuck up, lying, bratty bitch
-No matter how hard you've tried in the past and continue to try, nothing has stopped me and your brother from being friends, so- *Prussia voice* SUCK IT LOSER!!