Lana Del Rey - Old Money 

https://youtu.be/0MaAPzg_YbQ

One week fallowed another. Days passed, everyone were getting prepared for the wedding, except me. We made up with Jess. She agreed to be my maid of honor. My friend didn't say anything about Harry. We tried to avoid conversations about him. Harry was avoiding me, but I was still in touch with the guys. They didn't tell me about him anything either. My life changed without Harry. The sun doesn't shine like it used to, my favorite songs and movies didn't make me happy as they did before. I didn't laugh anymore. Everything looked so gray and aloof now. I missed his smile, laugh, the way he was looking at me. He left and took a part of me, there wasn't that red haired, happy girl anymore. He took her with him, leaving me alone with my despair. In preparation for the wedding, I decided to change my look. I was unable to look at my reflection anymore, I felt myself so ugly. I returned my natural hair color and of course Jess didn't like it. I was a blonde again, mom got happy when she saw me with a fair hair.

On the weekends, we went with my parents to our country house by the lake. We were almost silent during all our way. Only dad sometimes glanced at me, he decided not to tell anyone about Harry and I was very thankful to him for that. I was sitting on the backseat and looking through the window, admiring the view which was on the contrary depressing me even more.

"Blond hair suits you very well, dear," mom said, she was sitting in front next to dad.

"Thank you, mom, I was happy to change something in myself..." I replied, keeping up the conversation.

As I took a hair lock, I started pulling it. Mom is happy about my change of look, because now I became even more like her. I was pulling my hair lock and watching as my hair sparkled in the sun.

"Honey, you look so sad. I miss your laugh," mom said, turning to me. Her words put me in a wax.

"Of course, you're not the one who's getting married to a
jackass!" I replied sharply.

Mom opened her eyes wide and pursed her lips.

"Emily, stop it. Don't dare to talk like this with your mom!" dad said through his teeth.

I wanted to tell something offensive, but decided not to spoil his mood. Moreover, in this situation I am angrier at myself than on my parents. There was such a seething rage and anger in me that I constantly flied off the handle. I have never faced something like this before. But now I feel it myself that I changed a lot. I had to grow up quickly. From now on all our family's well-being lays on my fragile shoulders. No one asked me if I could handle this, they just put that burden on me. I am only eighteen, but I have already become Mr. Stone's guaranty. No one asked me if I was ready for this burden. I wanted to be just a girl and it even started to turn out. I had Harry...I turned to the window and began admiring the sunset. Good thing that we are almost there, I will endure this painful silence.

"Emily, try to be good today..." mom said after some kind of time.

I frowned, what does it mean, we won't be alone there?

"Did you invite someone?" I asked.

"Well yes, Mr. Stone and Michael," she answered quietly, shifting her gaze on dad.

"What? How dare you invite them?" I started resenting, raising my voice.

I wanted to ask dad to stop the car. I was even ready to go back home by foot, if only not to see Stone's faces. Seems like I am on the verge on the panic attack, as I clung into the seat.

"This Michael will soon become your husband, you can't avoid him forever!" mom answered rudely.

I moved closer to her and wanted to tell something caustic. I wanted to wipe that happy smile from her face.

"Enough already, it will be a fictitious marriage. I'll turn the music on, I'm done with your yelling!" dad said, turning the music on.

I was staring at mom intensively. Interesting, how long she was gathering herself up before telling about Stones. Although, how didn't I notice earlier that she was in an evening dress. Blue dress and diamond earrings, that's doesn't look like a family's holiday. Me and dad were wearing home clothes and mom decided to shine in front of our guests at her finest. I sat back on the seat, waiting for dad to choose a song. I always liked his taste in music. Looks like my love for music is inherited from dad. I wonder, what do I have from mom? I looked at her, well, definitely not the beauty and she wasn't interested in music. A bright, glamorous blonde. No one could guess her real age. My mom is very beautiful. I almost didn't wear make-up and in truth my natural hair color is blond. I was dyeing my hair into red for a long time, because I liked the look of funny red haired girl. But now I am blonde, this way I look more mature. I have mother's blue eyes, but it's the only similarity we have. Everything else I have got from dad: facial features and temper. By nature, my dad is a dreamer and mom was always down-to-earth. Finally, a familiar song began to play "Nat King Cole - Autumn leaves". As soon as I heard it, I got shivers up my spine.

https://youtu.be/ZEMCeymW1Ow

"You're doing it on purpose?" I asked, moving closer to dad.

I didn't like his choice, even though I liked this song very much. It reminded me of Harry, and dad clearly knew it.

"You weren't punished for your misbehavior, am I right?" dad whispered, so that mom couldn't hear.

I stretched my hand to turn the music off, but dad didn't let me do that.

"Every misbehavior needs to be punished. You hurt that guy, so now enjoy your own pain..." he added whispering.

I was angry at him and closed my ears, not wanting to listen, but dad made the music even louder. I pouted and sat back, whilst dad started cheerfully singing along and then even mom joined him. I got my punishment, it would be better if he deprived me of money like normal dads do or forbid going to the parties. But dad knew that all the mentioned things are indifferent to me, I can easily live without them. He knew for sure who wasn't indifferent to me - Harry, and he knows that I am thinking about him right now. I looked thought the window and tried not to listen to the words, but I couldn't. I know this song by heart.

"Sing with us, we haven't sung together for ages!" mom said laughing.

She was smiling and looked happy, I was unable to deprive her of this moment and began to sing along.

"The falling leaves drift by the window. The autumn leaves of red and gold," I was singing along heavy-heartedly. I wondered, as I looked at the window, it's autumn right now and I see autumn leaves which are drifting behind the window.

"I see your lips, the summer kisses, the sun-burned hands I used to hold. Since you went away the days grow long, and soon I'll hear old winter's song..." Harry's image appeared in front of my eyes, memories were changing one another.

I remembered how I saw him for the first time and remembered our last encounter. Thank you, daddy, for the punishment.

"But I miss you most of all my darling, when autumn leaves start to fall..." I finished singing, staring through the window; a pink dazzling sunset was as if trying to calm me down.

The last sunbeams were gently warming my skin, with this light my hair shone gold. I put out my palm towards the sunbeams and saw a little scar. I slide upon it, remembering how I tried to protect Harry from a robust guy and smiled unconsciously. I must have looked silly from the outside - a little girl was threatening a man, but I would do it again, if it was necessary. I didn't notice how we reached the house. As I got out of the car, I saw that there was Michael waiting for us on the porch. He was smiling histrionically. I wanted to kick him straight off, so that he stopped pretending that we are a happy family. No, we will never be happy together. But I contained myself and passed by. I quickly entered the house. We haven't been here for a long time. Earlier, when I was younger, we went here more often. I headed over my room. Everything is just like before, nothing has changed, except that I am different now. I became an adult and I am not so careless like before. I didn't talk to Michael, even though he tried to talk to me more than once.

"Call me Jake, after all we'll be a family soon..." Mr. Stone said to me smiling, once again as I didn't know how to call him.

"Okay," I babbled.

As I refused to have a dinner, I made a complaint about my headache. I decided to go to sleep earlier, so I wrapped myself up in the blanket and tried to fall asleep. My memories of childhood affected me like a lullaby and I quickly fell asleep.

"Blondie, I like it..." I heard a man's whisper.

I opened my eyes abruptly and reflexively kicked the man who was lying down on my bed. I quickly jumped up and rushed to turn the lights on. As I expected, it was Michael. He was lying on the floor and moaning in pain, looks like I kicked him very good.

"What do you need?" I resented.

"What got in to you, gone crazy, I just wanted to lie down next to you!" he cried.

"Oh, so you wanted to lie down!" I kicked his ass, as I came closer.

I wanted to do that for such a long time already, it even got lighter on my soul.

"Who are you pretending to be?" the blond yelled, getting up from the floor.

While he didn't get up, I kicked him again.

"Get out!" I rejoiced my own victory.

"You think that you're so cool, better than everyone of us! You're just a stupid girl!" the guy yelled, grabbing his own ass.

"I'll never be yours! Don't even dream about that!" I said, laughing at him.

I was disgusted to think that he could lie down on the same bed with me. It made me squirm when I tried to imagine our wedding.

"Sooner or later you'll open your legs like all the whores do!" Michael got red in anger and yelled at me.

I slapped him without a moment's hesitation that he even got slightly cockeyed.

"I'll never sleep with you!" I replied, rubbing my hand.

In a minute, he came to his senses and ran out of the room.

"Freaking coward, run to your daddy... " I said, picking up a blanket from the floor.

I decided to lock the door, so that I could sleep calmly. As I wrapped up in blanket, I tried to fall asleep again. The image of running Michael appeared in front of my eyes. I rejoiced in my heart. Finally, I could stand up for myself and fight back. My arms were scratching for a long time to hit him. I'm happy that I kicked him and I don't regret even a bit. And thus, I fell asleep with a smile on my face.