The next word from him came through at around 3pm on New Year's Eve. It was a short text, and the exchange that ensued did not ease the tension teetering between us.

Frazer: Where are you? Sent at 3:04pm

Me: Home. Sent at 3:08pm

Frazer: Why are you not at the hotel? Sent at 3:10pm

Me: What hotel? Sent at 3:12pm

Frazer: The Ville. Where we said we'd meet. Sent at 3:15pm

Me: Oh. That one. Sent at 3:20pm

Frazer: So? Are you on your way? Or do you want me to pick you up? Sent at 3:27pm

Me: I'm going to cancel. Sent at 3:29pm

Frazer: What do you mean cancel? This is our last chance to see each other before I go to the US. Sent at 3:32pm

Me: I'm just feeling rather tired. I was hoping to catch up on sleep. Sent at 3:35pm

I watched the dots appear and disappear several times. Then finally he sent through:

Frazer: Can you please just come? So we can talk about this in person... Sent at 3:45pm

Even though I wanted to stamp my foot more, in the end I took a deep breath and sent back:

Me: Fine. Sent at 3:50pm

◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷

I rapped three sharp knocks on the door and waited for him to let me in. Thankfully it didn't take too long. He was quick to yank me into the room with a glance over my shoulder.

"It's fine," I reassured him as I walked further into the suite, eyes taking in its opulence as I placed my bag down in the living area. "There was no one in the hallway when I—"

I didn't get to finish my sentence though. His arms had engulfed me, his body pinning me against the wall, and his mouth quickly coming towards mine.

Though with all the strength I had, I wiggled through his grip and shoved at his chest. "What do you think you're doing?"

He stumbled backwards in shock, as if our texts earlier or spat the other day had never happened. "Greeting my girlfriend who I haven't seen in—"

"Two days. If even that. I didn't see you greeting me like this when—"

"Are you still hung up on that?"

"Am I..." I scoffed, staring at him like he'd grown two heads. "Do you really think we can pretend the other day didn't happen?"

"Nothing happened."

"Nothing? You blew me off."

"I needed to sleep and you stormed out."

"Because you basically told me to get out!"

"I never—"

"You didn't welcome me."

"I didn't expect you to be there. We hadn't planned—"

"I didn't realise I had to book a meeting to see you these days. My apologies to the oh-so-famous and untouchable Frazer Young." I curtsied at him before turning to grab my bag.

He released a deep sigh before asking tiredly, "Where are you going?"

"Home." I continued storming towards the door.

"Em... stay." His footsteps were faster than mine, his hand grabbing my arm to pull me to a stop.

"I don't want to," I muttered, refusing to face him.

"We won't see each other for at least two months. This is the last chance for us to make some more memories to get us through that."

Staring at the door, I forced out the next words, "Perhaps it's for the best that we don't make more."

He dropped his hold of me before he demanded, "What does that mean?" As if I had stung him.

"It means... You're already drifting from me anyway. Perhaps we should end this now instead of in two months."

"I'm drifting from you? How?"

I turned to face him, unable to fight the sting in my eyes as I finally unleashed on him all I had been holding back this past month. "Ten."

"What's—"

"That's how many times I've seen you since graduation. And that includes video calls."

The confusion flattened off his face as he stared back at me, unreadable. "I've been doing gigs. Working. You know I don't have time—"

"No... You don't have time for me. You've made that clear."

He pinched his nose bridge before he asked, "You asked me to pursue this. I'm pursuing it. And what? Now you're upset that I am? Did you not realise how busy I'd be?"

"It's not how busy you are... it's that you let it follow you when we see each other. It's like you don't know how to switch from being Apollo to Frazer... or perhaps you blame me for all the stress you're facing and that's why you take it out on me."

"Take it out on you?"

"You ignored me at grad—"

"We discussed that. You know I don't know how to act like we—"

"Oh come off it, Fraze. If you can pretend I never existed in an interview or when you explain the inspiration of your song to your fans at a concert—which I have seen snippets of, by the way, so I know you can act—then you can still approach me in a crowd like we're just friends. You made a big deal when I asked to hide us, but now it's almost like you're relishing in this double life that request created. So much so that when you are forced to come back to reality—to who you used to be—you can't help but be annoyed your boring life is still there. Like you wish we'd just disappear. So perhaps that's what we should—"

"What have I done that makes you think I think you're boring?"

"... Other than barely speaking to me when you were away? Well, you came home and snubbed your nose at your mum and her attempts to create a home for you. And then you realise I'm there to surprise you and snub your nose at me."

"Snub my nose? What does that even mean?"

"I was the last person you wanted to see at that moment. And your girlfriend should be the first person you want to see... which was why your mum arranged the stupid surprise, thinking it would improve her quality time with you if she got our reunion out of the way. Little did she know it wasn't necessary. You didn't even miss me. In fact, I was just a stain on your—"

"I was tired, Em. I had been up until 2am because of a concert then got up at 6am to get on a plane to come back here. I just wanted to sleep."

"But why treat me like that?"

"Because... I was tired. And I get grumpy when I'm tired." His tone wasn't sympathetic though. He was still in the position that he was completely free of guilt.

So I did all I could do. I turned away from him. I didn't flee, I didn't move at all. I just couldn't look at his face—contorted with irritation—any longer.

Endless moments passed at our impasse, neither of us conceding for the longest time.

Until finally he sighed. He stepped closer and wrapped his arms around my body, pulling me into his chest as he mumbled, "I'm sorry I was grumpy. I shouldn't have spoken to you like that. You are the first person I want to see. Always. I just... I'm really stressed. And tired. I'm so tired all the time... I miss sleeping."

"Then why don't you use this break in your schedule to catch up on sleep?"

He turned me around so that he could look into my eyes with his hypnotic green gaze. "I'd rather spend time with you than sleep."

My face fell to a deadpan. Though as I opened my mouth to retort, he cut me to it.

"—I know I didn't do that the other day... though please don't be mad at me for things I say or do when operating on like 3 or 4 hours sleep. I may have not fully caught up, though I have gotten more shut eye over the past few days since being back. And being with you now is way more restful than how tired I'd be if I didn't get to see you until I'm back from the US."

My resolve to stay mad was quickly depleting by the second. Though I still had some final ammo to shoot. "But you can't talk to me like that again."

"I will endeavour to check myself first before I speak when I'm tired."

"And... you need to somehow talk to me more."

"... It's hard, Em. There's always people around and close, reading over my shoulder. My manager says no one can be trusted. They'd all be quick to leak—"

"Can't you make those in your circle sign an NDA or whatever?"

"Involving lawyers for stuff like that can get expensive. And I don't have regular people just yet. It's more about hiring staff where we are so that we don't have to transport and house them. When I get more famous, my manager said that's something we can—"

"But... can't you at least text me good morning and good night? There's no one around then..."

"... Yeah. You're right. I can. I'll try."

I should have known that 'I'll try' wasn't a solid enough guarantee, but because I wanted to believe in him, in us, I accepted his lackluster promise.

"Now... how about we pop open the lovely bottle of shiraz I brought and start actually celebrating this lovely year and toasting to the next?"

"That sounds great," I replied as I let him swoop me into his arms and carry me over to the couch. "But what even is shiraz?"

"It's wine, my love."

Like the fool I was, my stomach tingled at his term of endearment. "Oh... I've never had wine. I hope I like it."

"Nor have I... I hope it's good. It cost a lot."

"How much?"

"... Let's just open it for now."

And so he popped the cork—most definitely ungracefully—and poured us both a glass. Though as I brought it to my mouth and sipped at the burgundy liquid, my face contorted at the bitterness.

Thankfully, when I glanced at Frazer, his eyes were similarly scrunched.

"I'm sorry to say this, Fraze... but I don't think I like wine."

"Nor do I... But I'm going to power through this."

"... Can't we just order room service for something we know we will like?"

"You can. I don't want this to go to waste."

"Oh, c'mon. How much was it really for you to—"

"Three thousand."

My mouth quickly clamped shut. I blinked a few times, waiting for him to crack a smile at the joke. But when it didn't come, "Dollars?"

"Yes, dollars."

"Australian?"

"It would be worse if it was US."

"Perhaps it's New Zealand?"

"It's Australian dollars."

Then the shock depleted and the horror took over. "Why on earth would you spend—no, waste—so much money on something like alc—"

"I wanted to impress you."

"Impress..." I heaved a sigh and dropped my head to my hands. "If you want to impress me, be present, Fraze. Smile when you see me. Text me... Don't buy fancy alcohol you don't even know if I like."

"... but rich people always drink wine in the movies."

Shaking my head, I could hold the smirk as I looked up at him. "I don't know how to break it to you, Frazer, but we very much aren't living in a movie."

"... Yeah... But it often feels like my life has become one."

◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷

We did our best to persevere through the bitterness, but alas our taste buds won in the end, so we caved and ordered a bottle of rum and a few cans of coke to the room, mixing our own drinks as we wound our way to midnight.

Drunk from the alcohol and rekindling with each other, I didn't even recall waiting for the fireworks. One moment we had poured another drink, the next we were professing our unwavering love for each other, and then we were on each other like rabbits, Frazer dragging me to the bedroom.

The next morning I very much regretted our decisions. The nausea was inescapable.

As I stumbled out of bed to the shower in the hopes the warm water would quell the hangover, my stomach churned. Nonetheless, I pushed through, washing my hair, applying a light layer of makeup, and forcing my birth control pill down my throat.

When our room service breakfast arrived and I stared at the eggs, toast, and bacon on my plate, my stomach bubbled.

Then when I finally brought the food to my mouth, the acidity arrived.

My mouth was at once consumed with saliva.

The drinks from last night quickly flushed up my throat.

And I ran for the bathroom before I blew chunks into the toilet.

"Em?" Frazer called out from the bedroom. "Are you o—"

"Don't come in!" I cried back before another wave of nausea hit me and I was vomiting again.

"I'm coming in.".

"No," I begged as I had another break, flushing the toilet in the hopes he didn't see. "I'll be out soon. Please g... g..." But it was coming up whether I liked it or not.

And—rather than leaving like I requested—Frazer brushed back my hair for me and held it as I emptied my stomach. "Get it all out," he encouraged as he rubbed my back. "It's the best way to feel better."

"It's the most embarrassing," I whimpered when it stopped.

Frazer let go of me for a second, reaching for a towel in the bathroom that he then used to wipe my face. "I'm sure you and I will have many more embarrassing moments in our long lives together. Let's make a start with this."

Shaking my head at him in disbelief that he could find this romantic, I mumbled, "You better not write a song about this."

Then he sang, "When you were vomiting into the toilet, I just knew we'd be forever."

"No. Definitely not."

"I think it's going to be a hit."

Read ahead on Patreon. Link also on profile