Song: Just For A Moment by Joshua Bassett and Olivia Rodrigo from the series; High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (HSMTMTS)

Chapter Fifty-three: All over again

"Cherry wait!"

I heard him call out to me, but I didn't wait. I continued heading for the door. I heard footsteps then he grabbed my hand and spun me around to face him.

I yanked my hand away from his. The image of him was blurry through all my tears. My heart wasn't broken. It was shattered, and I could feel the pieces vanishing bit by bit.

"Let me explain."

"I don't want to hear what you have to say you cheater! Just one fight and you're already crawling into bed with your so-called sister!" I yelled at him as I turned around to walk into the car.

The cold breeze hit me like knives. He ran to stop in front of me. "You don't understand."

"I understand it perfectly you jackass. I want you to stay away from me!" Everything I was saying now was literally me shouting.

"Just listen please." He raised his hand to touch my face.

"Don't you dare touch me!" I continued walking.

"I love you. Just listen. Dammit!"

"Is this love? Is it? We had a fight that was basically your fault and I was foolish enough to come and apologize to you and here you are, with the person you know I hate the most in this world."

Just then I looked back to see Serena running out of the elevator.

I eyed her before turning back to him. "You two can have each other." 

I turned forward and started walking away.

"Cherry woul-"

I lost it. I turned back and yelled. "Do not call me Cherry! I am not your Cherry! I am not your anything!"

I could see tears in his eyes, but he could shove his theatrics up his ass. Skyler and Serena were right.

"He's already sleeping with the next pretty thing, he seems to have a knack for that."

"It'sa habit for him to move on from girls pretty quickly."

"Old habits die hard."

Their words kept repeating in my head as tears ran down my face.

"I am begging you. You have to listen. You can't leave me."

"My dad was a stinking cheater, but at least he could admit to it. You? I caught you Zane! I freaking caught you! And you have the nerve to want to defend yourself? God knows what you have to say for yourself. And you know the events that led to this aren't exactly in your favor. How do you expect me to believe you when you didn't believe me? You couldn't even look me in the eye and say you believed me. Why would I lie Zane? Why? Instead you believed her." My eyes glanced towards Serena who was standing a good feet away. "You believed her. She is breaking our relationship. And your way of solving it, is getting in bed with her? Call me once you've found out if your methods are effective."

Serena started. "He-"

I cut her off. "Just shut up! I think you've done enough. You had every chance to defend him when we were talking upstairs, but you didn't. Don't do it now because he's here."

I reached into my back pocket for his car keys and threw it at him. It landed smack on his chest. "I don't want to hear from you. I don't want to see you. I want you to leave me alone. According to me, you don't exist. And this time I mean it. It's better that way." I said this more calmly, the tears flowing down now.

I walked towards the car and climbed into it. I saw him fall on his knees at the entrance. And Serena rushing up to him. The perfect couple.

"Char?" 

I just looked down at my hands that were shaking on my lap and muttered, "He said he'd never hurt me."

And with those last words to Xander, I broke into sobs. I felt completely and utterly broken and used. All his words were lies.

"I can't escape the way I love you."

"Every time I see you I fall in love with you all over again."

"You're beautiful."

"One day, someone is going to hug you so tight, that all your broken pieces would stick together."

His hugs did that, then he broke me into pieces all over again. 

I just wanted to sink into a hole and never come out.

I could feel Xander comforting me the rest of the ride home, and carrying me up to my room and into bed. He said some things, but I wasn't paying attention.

Unconsciousness reigned over me immediately I lay on my bed that night, but it wasn't a peaceful slumber.

************

My eyes fluttered open. I would have yelped because of the face about three inches from mine, but I didn't. I just turned the other side and closed my eyes again.

"Well, that was rude." Veka scoffed.

I didn't move.

"I saw Xander carry you in last night. What is going on Char? You didn't leave your room yesterday. And next thing I know, Xandy boo's carrying you inside. He came to check on you this morning."

I still didn't move or say anything.

"I asked him what happened and all he said was Zane. Can you please tell me what's going on? I made breakfast for you even though it's already 3 pm."

I muttered a thanks.

I don't know if she heard it or not, but she left after that. I spent the rest of my day, awake, in bed and staring into space. I didn't move. I didn't touch my food. And thank God I didn't feel like peeing because I probably would have wet myself. Rev checked on me a couple more times, but left when she saw I hadn't gotten up. Sometimes she'd just sit at the edge of the bed. I didn't know when I slept off.

******

Someone was shaking my shoulder. "Char! Wake up."

Leyla.

"Your ass better be out of that bed by the time I'm back from the kitchen."

Zahra.

"I don't think you should threaten a-"

Kai.

"I'll do whatever I want." I heard a door close.

"I think she's already awake." Leyla pointed out as she walked over to the other side of the bed to stand in front of me.

I looked up at her before looking back down. Kai sat at the edge of the bed. "Xander told us what happened. Or at least what he thought happened."

Leyla put a hand on my shoulder. "We're really sorry. Is there anything we can do to take the pain away?"

Tears started streaming down my eyes. I just want Zane. I just want him to not have hurt me like he promised.

And since I couldn't have that, I just shook my head. They couldn't take the pain away. No one but Zane could, but if I saw him right now I'd kill him so that wouldn't really be helpful.

"You're crying again? But your eyes are already red-rimmed and your face is puffy."

I looked up at Xander who had just entered and murmured a thanks to him. For last night. He just nodded and sat beside me. 

"You know we're not going to let you rot in here."

I loved my friends, but can they just let me die?

No. They can't.

I actually sat up and gave them a small smile. "Thanks guys, but I rather stay in here."

"Forever?" Leyla questioned with a frown.

I nodded. "Forever. Forever."

She shook her head. "No."

"I'm back," Zahra sang as she swung the door open, "and I brought-" She cut herself off once she glanced at me. Then she exclaimed with a horrified expression on her face, "You look like you've been sat on by a whale!!!"

I wiped by never-ending silent tears. "A whale did sit on me. A very fat one!"

She scrunched her face in confusion.

"Named Zane." Xander expatiated.

She sat down on the other side of the bed beside me and patted my head. "Aww sweetie. I really thought he was the one."

I sighed. "Me too."  I'm crying again. I'm hopeless.

Get yourself together.

"Please don't cry." Kai begged.

"How can I not?" I sobbed. "He told me he loved me. I thought he'd changed. I thought he'd changed for me. And what does he do?" I sniffed. "He goes behind my back and cheats on me."

Zahra pulled me into a hug and continued patting my head. "Sweetie, you have to forget about him."

"I can't."

"You have to try."

"Something's not right here. I don't think Zane would cheat. He loves you." Leyla defended.

"I guess everyone's not what they seem to be." Zahra replied.

Kai was about to say something, but I cut him off. "He may love me, but sometimes people can't handle their aching need to be a man whore. I guess he couldn't just wait for me."

Zahra sighed and shook her head. "Some guys can't just keep it in their pants."

I wrung my fingers together and rolled my lips inward. I repeated. "He couldn't wait for me."

Leyla turned to Xander. "Why are you quiet?"

Xander turned to her slowly as if trying to evade his thoughts. "Oh, I'm just thinking of many ways to rearrange Zane's face."

They all laughed, and a small smile played on the edges of my lips, but it didn't reach my eyes.

Would it ever stop hurting that I'd be able to be happy and laugh again? I never thought that being in love with someone came with conditions. When it's over, it just feels like your life is over too. Like you have no purpose because all the ones you had before just vanish when you're without the one you love. And it hurts like you're being sat on by Mount Everest. Like a shark biting off your precious long fingernails bit by bit. Like a bird whose wings have gotten cut off. And this time I am not exaggerating.

**************

"You've been ignoring me and then you spend the rest of your day with your friends." Rev asked angrily when I sat up on my bed on Sunday morning. 

I hadn't exactly been any much different than before, but at least I was talking. I spent the rest of the day with them, but they mostly talked and I listened and smiled a little when I was supposed to. But it didn't feel the same. It felt like a void was there. It felt like something was missing and I knew exactly what it was. Zane. My happiness. He was my main happiness. And he took it with him when he left. A little is left there because I still have family and friends too, but without that huge chunk the rest feels like it's fading away.

I glanced at her and then down at myself. I don't think I've showered since Friday morning. I haven't even left my room. The only times I left my bed was to use the toilet. "Rev I'm sorry, but I'm just not in the mood."

She sat on the bed. "And I want to know why. No one has told me anything. How do you think seeing you so down makes me feel?"

I ran a hand through my tangled hair. At least I tried to.

Your hands would probably get stuck there if you don't take it out.

I dropped my hand. "Long story short. Zane cheated on me with Serena and I never want to see him again."

"His picture is on your bedside."

I knew. Because I had been staring at it.

"Should I break the frame and tear it up?" She asked. "Because I would really love to. Bruny messes with you, he messes with me too."

"I don't think I'm ready for that yet." I sighed, feeling disappointed in myself for holding on.

Next thing you know, you'll probably be sniffing his spare clothes in your closet.

Too far.

Rev put a hand on my shoulder and shrugged. "It's okay. I could always just cut off his reproductive organs and staple it to his head."

I gave her a small smile for the effort and before I could inform her that won't be necessary, there was a knock on the door.

"Come in!" Rev yelled.

Nothing happened. "I said come in!"

"I can't. My hands are full!" Aaron yelled back.

She gave me a confused look and I shrugged. She stood up and opened the door for him. He was standing there holding a tray filled with food. He walked in and set it on my table.

"How did you knock?" Veka questioned.

"With my thick skull." He rubbed his head. "Which I'm starting to think is not so thick."

Rev chuckled and ruffled his curly black hair. He swatted her hand away.

He walked up to me and sent me a sad smile. "Grace said you're not feeling well so I should come give you this."

He touched a strand of my hair. "You look like a zombie." 

***********************

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