Cassian

Isabella had gone quiet as they walked back to the town house. Cassian didn't blame her considering the fact that he was shitting himself. Maybe he should have tried to make it more romantic, more symbolic and date-like but he doubted that would go over well with a female– woman – who so clearly knew little about Fae society and culture.

Of course she had read every book that Rhys sent her. Tiny had certainly inherited his love of literature from his mother. Which only forced Cassian to wonder what he had inherited from his father.

The copper tinged hair apparently.

His chest tightened at the thought. Which is ridiculous because Cassian had told himself he wouldn't step as a father figure for Ollie until Isabella specifically asked him too.

Which is complete bullshit considering he's already prepared to die for the boy but he's trying to be considerate.

Despite the fact that Oliver's parentage both in the sense of biology and adoption had been a topic of great discussion among the inner circle he hadn't actually prepared himself to talk about Oliver's father with Isabella.

They had speculated at first, when they hadn't truly known Isabella. It had been a tidbit of gossip. A curiosity. Then they had stopped out of respect though no one pretended not to be at least curious about the boy's father. There had been a brief period when Azriel had actively hunted Oliver's biological father.

He had chalked it up to some paltry excuse of a security risk. Claiming that Isabella should know where the male resides should she move here. Cassian wasn't whether Azriel meant that Isabella could then avoid her babby-daddy or that she could then move closer to him.

Or move in with him.

Except Cassian was the one she was talking about having a future with.

Which had resulted in no small amount of preening from him. Sure he had told Isabella that he would always be there for her. In turn she had also trusted him, with her secrets and son. But this? This was a concrete step, a future.

Part of him had wondered what the hell he was doing. Two months ago he was partying and sleeping around the majority of Velaris. Two days ago he was looking at nurseries and school districts.

It was both terrifying and exhilarating.

Or it would be exciting once he knows that Isabella accepts the bond. Because she has to at least give it a shot, right? She's talking about moving in together, raising a child together and doing all the things that married humans do.

And marriage is technically the equivalent to mating.

(It's not really but he needs some hope)

Tomas of course doesn't count. Isabella might be married to him but she doesn't want to do married things with him. It was Azriel who read Oliver bedtime stories and it was Cassian who fixed up Isabella's kitchen.

Azriel.

Az who is currently looking paler and paler by the minute. Not that you could really tell but Cassian knows his brother– partner– friend? Oh they really need to define what their relationship is as well.

Hence the conversation.

The one that they all seem to be dreading.

Rhys absolutely picked up on the tension. The male thankfully fucked off though not without raised brows and a concerned look that was undermined by his amused smile. Isabella had quietly murmured about needing to leave within the next 30 minutes so Cassian had quickly led her to the patio chairs they had originally sat in.

His palms began to sweat. He was fidgeting. It was awkward and down right stressful but everytime Cassian opened his mouth to tell her he found his throat dry. Or his words trapped.

Why couldn't he have Rhys' ability to smoothly talk through any situation? Diplomatic or domestic.

Azriel who had originally hovered in the doorway slumped down in the chair next to Cassian. The shadows swarmed around him, as if attempting to swallow him whole and hide their master from the conversation at hand.

Fat chance of that happening. If Cassian had to tough out this awkwardness then so did he.

"I never knew his real name." Cassian straightened up at the blurted out words. Relife briefly bloomed in his chest when he realised that he didn't have to start this conversation. Then he realised who Isabella was talking about. "Oliver's father, I mean."

Her throat bobs and he hates the pain this is causing her.

"You don't have–"

"Yes I do." She whispers, cutting Azriel off with a soft smile that he doesn't return. "I'm not sure where he was originally from but there were plenty of tales about the summer court, spring and especially autumn. He seemed to have friends there, or maybe family."

Oh those were not good options.

Not only is he banned from summer but the fucking autumn court is just dangerous place all round.

There is no way in hell he is letting Isabella and Ollie step anywhere near those fiery bastards.

"He went by the name Sumarsol– Sol." A bitter laugh. "I thought it was ridiculous but cute."

Doesn't seem like they ended on good terms.

That thought really shouldn't have pleased him so much,

"It was an escape, nothing more really. If there was any love between us then it was an idealist view." Her head tilts to the side. "I did love him." Cassian suppressed a growl. "But I am not sure if it was the real him I loved. The fact that I love Sol and not whatever his actual name was can attest to that. But he also loved Belle. It was easier for us to be different people when we gave each other different names."

"He came to the human realm." Azriel asked, voice calm and Cassian bristled at the tone he recognised from interviews and interrogations.

She nodded. "And I went to Prythian."

Cassian jolted and he saw Azriel blink in surprise. Isabella laughed mirthlessly.

"Tomas was less... controlling then. He trusted me more since I had given him no reason to doubt me." A shadow passed over her eyes and Cassian debated slaughtering her husband for the painful memories he gave her. "It was easy to slip across the border and into the spring court. Sol claimed he had a connection with one of the sentries, or maybe he was one of the sentries. I confess that I didn't really care."

Cassian didn't really care who the male was but his actions were loud and clear. Who the fuck would bring a human over the wall for a little tryst? Didn't he consider the dangers?

"Did Tamlin know?" Azriel leant forward, arms bracing against the table.

"Maybe? Though I never met him." There was a far away look in her eyes. "Sol certainly worked in some form of government. He could hold conversation of that manner–"

Cassian couldn't stop himself from snorting though he quickly quietened down at Isabella's seething gaze.

Then he paused.

Did she want someone to have political conversations with? She was certainly an intelligent fem– woman.

He could feel his throat tighten at the thought. Illyrian politics were by no means simple but they were certainly easier to understand than the High Lords.

She'll probably want to talk to Rhys about that, he thought bitterly.

"Did you meet anyone else from Spring?" Azriel's voice was so calm that Cassian wanted to punch him. How was he not overthinking every word their mate said? She was literally talking about the male who fathered her child.

"I met some of his friends though I doubt they gave me their real names..." She paused for a moment, thinking but then her eyes shuttered. Cassian felt himself tense up in response. "They most likely wore glamour."

Ouch.

He'd be pissed too.

What kind of a relationship has you lying about names and hiding faces?

"And Oliver?" Azriel's voice finally wavered. He certainly had a soft spot for the little boy.

Isabella's throat bobbed. He could practically taste the grief clouding the air. Silently, Cassian reach over and gripped her hand. For a moment he feared she would pull away but his mate only glanced down at their clasped hands before raising her head again.

"He wasn't exactly planned between Sol and I, but Tomas made it no secret that he wanted children."

Rage clouded his vision.

For a moment he felt his hand tighten, muscles bunching up as though ready to launch into the sky. A second later he felt Isabella toying with his hand, fidgeting and unintentionally calming him down.

"Sol and I initially believed the child to be Tomas', humans have better odds at conceiving after all." That look in her eyes had him pausing, gaze narrowing.

"How did Sol react?" Calm calculated words to hide the burning wrath in Azriel's eyes.

Isabella clears her throat and Cassian hates that small moment of hesitation. "He was upset. I don't think... I don't think that he ever really acknowledged the fact I was married. I never hid it but we didn't... explicitly talk about it."

Her mouth twists into a bitter expression. "It's not exactly something you discuss with a lover."

Cassian would argue different but humans have different morals and ideals to fae so what would he know?

"He didn't shun me or anything but I had less time to spend with him, Tomas was on edge and wanted me home. I don't particularly blame him for that." Cassian opens his mouth to protest but Azriel cuts him off with a glare. "The pregnancy wasn't smooth by any means."

Of course. The thought still kept Cassian up late at night.

He could have lost her and Oliver. All to something so apparently simple and natural.

"We discovered Oliver's true parentage when I visit Sol at about 4 months pregnant. I had gone to ask for medical advice, I thought the fae might have some kind of magic capable of helping me."

"He scented the child." Azriel states and Isabella mutely nods.

"He went savage for a good week as well." Oh Cassian really doesn't like this male.

"One of his friends convinced him to let me go." Her head cocks to the side. "I had always wondered why. Sol and I were never in love though we did care about each other, it was just a fling, but I assumed we could be civil enough– friends even– to raise our child together."

"Sol cared for the babe." Azriel frowned, surprise flickering in his eyes before it was hidden away.

A soft laugh, "He loved Oliver from the second he regained his bearings. It was one of his friends who convinced him to send me back to Tomas." That inquisitive look, the one that Isabella always got when she figured something out. "I had thought it was a friend trying disway him from parenthood though now it makes more sense that they were trying to protect me."

"He did want... her to find out about you." Isabella's gaze snaps towards him and Cassian almost flinches back at the look in her eyes. He felt as if he were being reproached by a teacher. Their disappointment conveyed through a single look. It was the mum-look.

"I thought you of all people were above giving a name power." She grumbled, clearly grateful for the reprieve. "Sol and his friend sought to keep me safe from Amarantha," Cassian shuddered though Azriel managed to limit his own wince. "Though with her death I wonder what holds him back now."

The words were so quiet that Cassian realised he wasn't supposed to hear them.

She missed him. It made sense, they had some form of love and a child together. Though Cassian quickly shoved down the smug fact that Isabella wanted to move in with him and not this Saul guy.

"So Saul didn't support you during the pregnancy?" Azriel arched a brow at him but Cassian ignored his partner.

Isabella frowned at him. "Sol, wasn't there physically but he sent glamoured books on fae pregnancy and various tonics and salves that were supposed to help me."

"Supposed to?" Cassian felt worry begin to take over his anger.

"Are we discussing whatever relationship drama is going on with the three of us or my medical history?" She sniped, far too defensive for a simple struggling pregnancy.

"If it poses any issue to you then we are discussing your medical history." Cassian narrowed his eyes at her. He was happy to respect boundaries and go at her speed but medical issues were dangerous and he wouldn't take any chances. Especially if it were something that Madja could heal.

His mate remained silent. Not out of protest he realised but because she was lost in her own mind.

He felt his stomach begin to churn.

Cassian didn't remember much of his own mother. What he did was of a loving woman ravaged by poverty. She was sick, he remembers that much. He remembers his aunts disdainful words that still haunt him.

The boy did this.

The pregnancy had damaged her. Enough so that when he returned decades later to his home village he found she had barely lived a year past his... conscription. If Isabella was suffering the same consequences of birthing a fae.

He felt himself go white. Azriel and Isabella's conversation began to sound as if he were underwater, unable to open his mouth or breath for fear of drowning.

If something was wrong, they would fix it.

Cassian clung to those words. A promise he used to anchor himself as he pulled away from the panic that threatened to overwhelm him in a split second. How trying it was to be mated to a person so far away from you. Close enough to touch and see but never to hold.

"... someone at least is sending them." Isabella murmurs and Cassian slouches back in his chair, begging the stress and tension to leave his body.

At some point Isabella had let go of his hand. Instead she was clutching a fine china tea cup and Cassian found himself missing the comfort of her touch. He found himself missing her further when Rhys strolled into the room.

Cassian shared a quick glance with Azriel, realising that they hadn't broached the topic of mates at all.

Isabella rose with a smile, graciously accepting Rhys hand as he helped her to her feet. It was hard not to snarl at the action. Especially when they were so close to telling Isabella of the bond.

Well, he was so close to telling Isabella. Cassian had no doubts in his mind that Azriel had intentionally prolonged the conversation to avoid the topic. He almost snorted at the thought. How the male could be so keen to avoid his own mate, yet still exist in her orbit thanks to his own absolutely smitten behaviour, was quite frankly hilarious.

"I thought you might like another edition." Rhys' was smooth, a familiar tone that had Cassian's skin crawling. "It's from the same collection as the first Fae Fables. A early homecoming gift if you will."

A soft smile adorned Isabella's face though it didn't stop Cassian from glaring at Rhys as he handed over the handbound limited edition children's novel.

"Ollie will love it." Isabella stated, hesitantly smiling at the high lord. Cassian could have sworn that a soft blush bloomed on Rhys' sharp cheekbones.

Cassian was sure that Oliver would like the bag of chocolates and Velaris postcard they got him in the market as well.

"Will I be travelling back with you?" Isabella was still staring at Rhys. It was as if she had forgotten the two Illyrians standing at her back. The thought threatened to tear open old wounds.

"I can take you back." Azriel stepped forward, interrupting the moment and bringing Isabella's gaze back to her actual mates. "You preferred the shadow travel last time."

"Amren needs you," Rhys interrupts, voice hard. "I'll take Isabella back over the wall and then meet you at Amren's apartment."

The males glared at each other. It was two against one and Cassian was quite frankly done with his fae brother's shit. The second Azriel got in line beside Cassian he could confront the obtuse prick and find out what was bothering him.

His mate nodded gratefully at the High Lord's words. Though Cassian was pleased to note that there was a suspicious and confused look in her eyes before she turned to him with a smile that captured his whole attention. For a second they just stared at each other but then Isabella flung her arms around his neck, practically leaping into his arms and he melted into her grip.

The tension left his body and Cassian quickly curled his head into the crook of her neck. Eyes closing as he inhaled her scent. The smell of wood, parchment and that minty healing salve she uses on most of her patients cloyed his senses. But underneath all that there was something distinctly Isabella, a similar scent to the one that clung to her son.

There was a pointed cough and Isabella flinched in his arms.

Cassian immediately pulled back, loosening his arms enough to give her space to breath or pull away.

She did neither. Instead his brave mate up him, worried eyes seeking out the reassurance in his. Slowly she pulled away, murmuring something about seeing him at her sister's for their weekly check in.

Cassian felt himself nodding dumbly, unable to comprehend what was happening for his pride and heartbreak. He hated seeing her go. Every instinct in his soul screamed at him to keep her safe and close by. Tomas certainly wasn't safe and the human realm was by no means near by.

But he refused to be like her husband, like the majority of Illyrians and like his own bastard of a father. He was going to be better than them and he was under no illusions that it wouldn't take conscious effort for him to do so.

Azriel was quickly wrapped in a similar hug though Cassian was surprised to find that he felt disappointed when Isabella pulled away sooner from Azriel than she had with him. He hoped it was out of loyalty for him and not dislike of Azriel. His Az deserved a chance at happiness.

The second after Isabella smiled one last time before being whisked away by his High Lord Cassian whirled on the shadow singer. Azriel was already staring back at him but his shadows had all but disappeared, shrinking into the darkened corner of the rooms. It was odd to seem him bare like this. Such an integral part of him missing that he seemed more vulnerable.

Not that he looked that way with the viscous glare in his eyes.

"Right, that's it." Cassian growled, shifting into an easy fighting stance. "We are talking about this."

"I have a meeting with Amren." Cassian snarls at the raised brows and condescending expression on Azriel's face. "Wouldn't want to keep her waiting."

"I don't care what that little demon wants." Cassian hisses and Azriel's resolve begins to crumble. "We are talking about the bullshit you just pulled and why."

"Cassian–"

"I don't care."

"I am trying–"

"Training room or library, your pick."

Silence. The pair stare each other down.

"Mountainside."

A/N: ... I am not sorry for making you wait. But the next chapter is all Cazriel so enjoy.