Author's Note

This chapter was inspired by Remus's original backstory on Pottermore, as well as the beautiful fanart by Space Dementia on tumblr.

***

Remus hurried down the first staircase he came across along his way, entering a deserted hallway with dust covering the stoney floor and a bitter coldness sweeping through from the large open window.

He sat down on the first stair, rubbing his hands against his arms in a hopeless attempt to keep himself warmer. His eyes had teared up, an ache growing in his heart that he could not shake away.

He could still remember the day Dumbledore had visited him, nearly two years ago, only a few weeks after his eleventh birthday.

It was a beautiful spring evening. The weather wasn't too cold, but young Remus Lupin was enjoying the warmth of the blazing flames as he was sitting down on the carpet beside their little fireplace at home, playing a game of Gobstones all on his own. There was a tray full of crumpets right beside him on the floor, from which he occasionally picked one to eat.

Lyall Lupin was seated on an armchair in their living room, reading through that day's copy of the Daily Prophet. It had been a tiresome week at work, so he appreciated the peaceful quiet of the house.

Although the silence was bound to be broken when someone rang their doorbell.

"I'll get it," Hope called from the kitchen, who was busy washing the dishes after dinner. Putting the plate back down in the sink, she quickly wiped her hands with a tissue before getting herself to the door and opening it.

She was surprised to see that on the other side of the door an old man stood, tall and thin, with long beard and hair the color of silver. His bright blue eyes were glimmering behind his half-moon spectacles even in the darkness of the night.

Although the first thing that caught Hope's attention in the first look was his peculiar choice of clothing. The man was wearing a silvery cloak that swept to the ground, with odd-looking boots.

One look at him was enough to know that he was one of them.

"Hello," the old man started when Hope failed to speak, smiling at her softly. "You are Mrs. Lupin, I presume."

"I — y-yes..." Hope nodded, unsure of what a man like him was doing here, at this hour of the night.

"I'm Albus Dumbledore," the man introduced himself with a polite smile. Despite the strangeness of his name, Hope was sure she had heard Lyall mention him before. "I was wondering, is your son home?"

Hope suddenly went pale, her heart sinking. Lyall had tried for years to keep their son's condition a secret from the people he worked with, because of what their society thought of creatures like him.

With this wizard showing up at their door, Hope feared that Albus Dumbledore was here to take Remus away from them, but she was afraid to think what they would do to her son. She knew that her husband had given the order for execution to many dark creatures before in his lifetime. Was this why this man had come here tonight?

Hope didn't answer him. She couldn't let anyone take away her son. Not now. Not ever.

So with her eyes fixed on him fearfully and without moving from the doorway, Hope called out, "Lyall!"

Moments later, her husband showed up right behind her, his eyes widening the moment he laid eyes on the old man before them.

"Dumbledore?" Lyall breathed out in surprise.

"Good evening, Mr. Lupin." The old wizard kept on smiling. "I'm here regarding Remus's education at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. If I'm not wrong, your son is now eleven years old?"

Lyall's brows furrowed. "What sort of rubbish is this?"

"I understand that you must think —"

"No, you don't understand," Lyall said sharply, pointing a finger at Dumbledore furiously. "Someone like him — someone with his condition — is not safe in our society. I'm not going to put my son in any more danger than I already have."

"Mr. Lupin, I assure you that Remus's condition will remain a secret if he wishes to attend Hogwarts —"

"No! Absolutely not!" Lyall shook his head firmly. "Do you know what they would do if they find out about him? Remus has been through enough."

"I understand," Dumbledore said again, as gently as before, "but if you could just listen to the situation I'm willing to offer Remus to help him complete his education —"

"It would never be enough," Lyall whispered reproachfully, slamming the door shut.

Hope stood there in front of her husband for long seconds, watching the tears resurface in his chocolate brown eyes. Lyall hid his face in his palms, his hands slightly trembling.

"My fault... it's all my fault..." he kept muttered, over and over again.

Hope reached out for him, bringing him into an embrace. It had been years since the incident, and yet Lyall's guilt never left him for even a second.

"We'll be with him," Hope whispered. "We'll never let him be alone."

But she knew this was a lie. There was only so much they could do. They could never be beside him whenever the full moon came around. They could never be there with him when he needed them the most.

Blinking the tears away, Lyall dropped his hands and walked back into the parlor with Hope by his side.

The moment they stepped inside the living room, they came to a sudden halt when they saw that Albus Dumbledore was sitting on the floor beside the fireside, playing a game of Gobstones with Remus as he took bites from his crumpets which he had taken from the tray nearby.

"Ah, exceptional move!" Dumbledore chuckled, making Remus smile proudly. Then, without even looking up, the old man said, "Mr. and Mrs. Lupin, may I kindly request to speak with Remus in private?"

    Hope and Lyall hesitated at first, but at last they left the two alone in the living room and stepped into the kitchen, waiting.

     "Now tell me, Remus," Dumbledore started, picking one of the stones off the floor and observing it in his hand. "Do you know where Hogwarts is?"

    "Of course, sir!" Remus nodded delightfully. "My dad told me all about it when I was a kid."

    "And would you like to study at Hogwarts?"

     Remus's head shot up at those words as he felt a jolt of excitement in his stomach and his smile widened uncontrollably.

     "Me? Can I really go!?" he said in pure disbelief, his face lighting up.

     "Of course!" Dumbledore chuckled. "Why shouldn't you be allowed to go?"

     Remus's smile faded again. He remained mutely on where he sat on the carpet, with his hands clasped tightly in his laps as he looked away from the old man, as soon as the truth of his reality hit him.

     "I — I can't," he mumbled, his eyes fixed on the fireplace sorrowfully. "I'm — different... A monster."

    "A monster? Where!?" Dumbledore gasped fearfully, looking around the room. "But I don't see a monster here."

     "N-no, sir." Remus shook his head, finally looking up at him shamefully. "It's me — I'm the monster. I — I'm a werewolf."

     "Ah, I see." Dumbledore smiled warmly at him again, his face softening. "Let me tell you something, Remus Lupin. At this moment, when I'm looking at you, all I see is a clever young wizard who can't wait to prove himself worthy. And that's who you really are."

    Remus was now gazing into the old man's bright blue eyes, his heart pounding and filled with an unfamiliar feeling of hope.

    "So... I ask you again," Dumbledore went on, bending his head lower, "Would you like to study at Hogwarts?"

     Remus sniffed happily, managing a small nod. "Yes! Yes, I do!"

      The young boy could barely contain his excitement when his Hogwarts letter arrived in a few months. Dumbledore had reassured his parents, explaining the conditions and everything he had prepared for Remus's transformation.

     He told them that on the night of the full moon, Remus would be assisted to a safe house in Hogsmeade by a talented Healer at Hogwarts, Poppy Pomfrey, and that he could study at school just like any other young witch or wizard.

    Remus felt nervous at first, but upon meeting James, Sirius, and Peter, he let himself forget that he was a monster. For the first time in his life, he felt like he belonged somewhere. They were the first real friends he'd ever had.

    But now, as he sat on the dusty step of that deserted hallway with his knees hugged to his chest and his eyes filled with tears, he knew that his time at Hogwarts was over.

     His friends were going to abandon him, now that they knew Remus was a werewolf. They had probably told the whole school by now. The students' parents were going to send complaining letters and howlers, asking to expel the dangerous creature from Hogwarts. Remus gave them every right to do so. He was a danger to everyone, and he knew it.

    Maybe he didn't have to wait to be expelled. Maybe he could just run away tonight. No one would even miss him. They'd be relieved, if anything. He was sure of that.

     He wished he could go back in time. He wished he had never entered this place to begin with.

    Remus's ears then sharpened when he heard whispers behind him on top of the staircase, as someone said quietly, "He's here! I found him!"

    Remus didn't dare to move. Were they already here to throw him out?

     The next moment, he heard numerous footsteps coming down the stairs, until they finally reached him. Glancing upward, Remus saw James, Sirius, and Peter surrounding him.

    "We were looking all over for you, mate," said James, looking worried.

     "Go away," Remus mumbled, hiding his teary face behind his knees. He clutched his hands into fists so hard that his knuckles had turned white.

    Sirius mouthed silently at James, "Is he crying?"

     Instead of answering him, James sat down on the stair beside Remus and Peter sat down on his other side, while Sirius remained standing before them with his hands in his pockets and a distressed look on his face.

     "You've already told everyone, haven't you?" Remus muttered without lifting his head, the tears streaming down his cheeks.

     "What? Are you mental?" Sirius shook his head. "Of course we haven't! What kind of friends do you think we are? I'm personally offended."

     "Why would you think that, Remus?" James asked in a soft voice, deciding to go through the conversation more gently than Sirius.

    "Because now you know what I am..."

     Sirius snorted with laughter. "Oh, yes. Now we know you're a fluffy wolf. What horror has been relished! God bless us all from such dangerous monster!"

     James sent him a sharp look, as though saying 'now's not the time for stupid jokes', which immediately managed to shut Sirius up.

    Peter, who couldn't find the right words to say, reached out and placed a comforting hand on Remus's shoulder, but he still wouldn't look up at them.

     "We're your friends, Remus," James went on, choosing each word with care. "Actually, we're more than friends. We are brothers. And brothers have each other's backs, no matter what."

     "Yeah, no matter if you're human or a walking fluff-ball," said Sirius, unable to hold back the joke.

     "Sirius!" James hissed at him angrily, but he was then surprised when Remus let out a small laughter at that.

    He finally raised his head from his knees, wiping away his tears with the back of his hand as he sniffed.

     "You're... So you're not afraid of me?" Remus whispered, still not meeting their eyes.

    "Of course not!" said Peter. "I mean, I did a little at first when we found out. But it doesn't matter anymore. Like James said. We're the Marauders; it's the name of our brotherhood. It's for life."

     Remus's usual smile finally found its way back to his face. He looked up at each of his friends' faces, all beaming at him.

     James then grinned at Remus, bumping his shoulder sideways against his. "Marauders for life?"

     Remus nodded, sniffing through a little chuckle. "Marauders for life."

     And then, at that moment as he was surrounded by his friends, he believed for the first time in his life that he was never going to feel alone ever again.