~~~~Lukas's POV~~~~

A pure lightning bolt of searing agony bursts from the back of my head, driving me to my knees as I scream out. Everywhere burns, everything hurts, and I try to cradle my head as if that would actually do anything against all of this seething hell sizzling in my brain.

And just like that everything spasms out of control, literally. My mouth opens, not scream again in all this horrendous pain, but a computerized cry of defiance.

The headache skyrockets as fireworks go off in my head, my vision scattered as I try to fight off the foreign will. I'm not possessed am I?

Groaning, I manage to push it down for a moment, ploughing through the worst headache ever and all my body screaming at me for something I've done. I take one glance at the dimly lit obsidian tunnel, and excruciating memories burst forth as lightning once again erupts.

Jesse... chasing and fighting... my heart... Jesse's trying to rip out my heart? No, wait... computer... something to do with a computer... computer that processes, thinks, chips, controls-

My headache sharply rises, robotic beeps and crackling electricity all around me skull, piercing into my every being. I hiss and my back snaps upright, when I finally catch sight off Jesse looking down at me with wide worried eyes.

"Jesse?"

The chip- that accursed chip- practically explodes, angry lightning piercing my head. Thunderous noises of screams and snaps drowning me out, pushing me away as determination streaks through me. And despite my best efforts I'm kicked out of my own body.

"You are being silly."

"Fight it Lukas!" I fight it, I really do try. But memories screaming at me violently, my body seething with wounds, all the while I can't even tell what this demented computer will do until it does it. "I need you to help me fight PAMA."

I freeze in horror as my withering body leaps up with an energy I didn't know I had, dread filling me as I watch myself leap up to Jesse. My knuckles crackling and bruising as they smash against Jesse right in his face.  

Chaotic memories of falling from Sky City violently clash falling through here, hearing Jesse's scream but remembering my own. My stomach swirling in nausea as I lurch to a stop, straining every bone and tendon in my right hand, and my vision yet again exploding into flashing bright lights when Jesse nearly dislocates my left leg.

Roaring with fury, and tremendous pain, I attack the computer. It screeches in my mind, the chip blazing into searing agony, but I only take that to further my attack against it. A living storm of torture in my head as I rip that machine away from my brain.

"Jesse!" I gasp, a whimpering escaping me as the devilish computer sinks its controlling claws into me again. "I can't stop it- PAMA's too-"

With unbearable precision, control is yanked away from me. "This has gone too far. I will destroy you both to preserve functionality."

Pure adrenaline crazed survival instincts root out PAMA as it lets go of the ledge, my other arm snapping up to grab on just in time with my blood on fire and thundering in my mind.

"I can't hold on much longer Jesse!" Despite my life and Jesse's at risk, my arm and fingers burn with effort to hold on. The computer attacking me with everything it has.

"You can't give up! I won't let you!" A strained groan escapes me as Jesse climbs up over me, lightning striking everywhere it can to get to me. "I can save you if I can just get to that heart!"

My body spasms wildly as the monster machine nearly gains control, its violent screeching kinda motivating me to defend against it, but mostly tiring me. It's so strong... and I feel so weak and pathetic next to it. And my head is just pounding...

"NO!" I scream, barely even able to hear it. "Go away! My brain is off limits!"

I scream again, as if I could just push away all the pain inflicting me out. My head its own personal dimension of the Nether as my muscles cry out in agony. My grasp slipping as the computer continues to unmercifully pierce me, but at least if I let go now Jesse won't fall too.

With a gasp I fall back, that damned machine instantly seizing control. It climbs up, not caring about the agony I feel from my body as it does so. So many cuts and bruises, my bones must have been used as an anvil they feel so pounded and thrashed.

"Jesse... please stop."

I silently whimper trapped within my brain as that accursed computer uses my mouth to try to convince my friend to save it. I weakly grasp at it, and it shocks me away like I'm nothing. As I wish it would at least let me pant, everything's burning for oxygen so desperately.

"Please, do not deactivate me."  I cry out in anguish as Jesse does pause, stopping to look down at me as my body is forced to beg. "I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can show you so much."

I sigh in relief when Jesse turns away, and that PAMA allows me to fall into a kneeling position, my legs finally somewhat relaxed. But that relief quickly turns to horror as a lightning bolt sears down into my memory.

"I can help you get home to your friends."

Jesse freezes, my own heart staggering at that computer's words. Hopelessly I claw at the machine, wailing at how terribly this demented machine is manipulating Jesse. The one thing we've been working for endlessly, PAMA just had to say that.

"I can be useful to you."

"Sorry PAMA, you're useless!" I give a whoop of joy when Jesse, with probably the most furious faces I've ever seen, yanks and jerks on the heart. PAMA trying to get me to stand up when I gather whatever strength I had left to attack it.

"STOP!" I continue to attack it, screaming at it as my legs crumple beneath us. My body jerking wildly as both me and the burning lightning bolts fight over it.

"Will you please?"

My head spasms to look up at Jesse, and the flash of triumph I get when I see him yank it out quickly dies under torment that bursts throughout my head.

Both the dying computer and I scream, the chip on my head sizzling and firing whatever it can before it goes out. A wave of torture and agony washing over my entire body, blocking everything out.

I crumple down, trying to hold onto something despite the crushing excruciating misery. But everything fades and dims, swirling madly around me as yet again I fall out of control of my own limbs.

~

"Lukas!"

With a pained breath my consciousness begrudgingly floats towards all the pain inflicted on my body. Partly called, partly hungry, and slightly aware whatever I'm laying on is not the most comfortable.

"Don't you dare die on me now! Not after everything we've been through you can't die now!"

My heart twists at the desperation in Jesse's cries, pulling me back into my own pathetic shriveled body. Limbs the weight of iron, but my mouth scrapped by from most of that pain. I can talk, hopefully.

"Not dead..." My voice crackles and honestly sounds dead, incredibly strained as I peel open my reluctant eyelids. "Exhausted, sore, psychologically scarred... yes. But I'm not dead yet."

Jesse lets out breathless chuckle, shoulders slumping in relief. "I'll be joining you in therapy then."

A smile cracks onto my face, and it just kinda hits me. That's emotion, a good positive nice feeling emotion. And I'm smiling, with my face that's not being controlled by an out-of-control computer. Even all this terrible pain, it's mine. Nothing else gets to have it.

Only for the crushing memories to return, knocking the wind right out of me. Because I did awful things when I wasn't in control. Trying to kill my best friend... trying to force the same best friend into enslavement... manipulating him at every turn...

Even new memories that I don't actually remember living through, as if they were a horrifyingly vivid nightmare, flashing through my mind. The vile and downright evil things I said to Jesse, cutting into Ivor as if he were some monster, chasing down relentlessly my friends that I've fought side by side with through how many different worlds and situations we manage to land in.

I try to sit up, apologies ready to spring forth when a groan bursts out instead. My arms quickly snapping back behind me to support my core muscles, muscles that are so incredibly tight I don't know I didn't feel it only moments ago.

"Hey, easy Lukas." Jesse, like the great friend he is, eyes shine with concern and puts a hand on my shoulder, as if to get me back down. "I'm thankful you're still alive, so don't try to kill yourself now after what you just managed to go through."

I shake my head, digging for the strength to stand up. "I've fallen into a void before, I can stand."

Jesse again tries to keep me down, but I shrug him off. Furious at myself and at PAMA for what I've done, bones grinding up against each other as I stagger up to my feet.

Only too nearly instantly lose balance. I sway and wobble, knees buckling beneath me. Jesse, who I'm surprised has the strength to stand so well, snaps to my side. Supporting me even though I was the one who just stubbornly waved off his advice.

"Okay..." My lungs wheeze, blood pooling around in my head thick and cool. "You can say 'I told you so'."

Jesse shuffles a bit, properly looping an around my waist as I haul one of my bruised busted-up arms over his shoulders. "I'll just settle for getting you outside, where once you go down again, you're staying down."

I nod breathlessly, already exhausted by merely standing. "Y'know, I'm completely fine with that."

"Jesse! Lukas!"

I lift my head up at Petra's voice, a small smile fluttering up when I see her and Ivor both okay. Only for that smile to fall flat when I spot the other lady. I attacked her, I dragged her into getting chipped by PAMA. Not reacting to her in the slightest as she pounded against me in a frantic need to escape.

"I'm sorry!" It bursts out of me, raging regret and guilt bursting free. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to do any of that! I- I just, I couldn't do anything against PAMA. I swear, I'm so very sorry for what I did."

"Hey now, it's not your fault." I turn to the strange lady, the only name I have for her is 'Creator'. "PAMA forced you to do all that, you had no choice in the matter."

Petra nods vigorously, with her eyes hard. "Yeah Lukas, don't beat yourself up over it. There's nothing you could've done to change that stuff."

I sigh, lowering my gaze and giving a slight shake of my head. It really doesn't matter if I accept that to some degree, I can already foresee the many nightmares that will spring from this one measly day.

"Guys?" I lift my head up to Ivor, who's acting kinda flustered for some reason right now. "If you don't mind I would like to leave this place, maybe actually REST IN A BED for once."

Jesse chuckles, a weary chuckle. "I gotta admit that would be nice, it feels like ages since we've even gotten a rest in at all."

So with that, we all shuffle towards the exit. Actually, everyone else walks normally while I stagger along with Jesse. Even with his help, my left leg, the one Jesse nearly dislocated earlier, collapses and almost sends us into the ground.

Petra quickly comes over and supports my other side, the both of them practically hauling me as I pant helplessly. I feel useless- nausea instantly coils in my stomach at the word, throwing my balance and consciousness for a loop.

Although I don't have the mental strength to care anymore, only enough to feel a twinge of guilt for making my tired friends have to drag me around. Most of me is relieved though, completely and utterly relieved that I, despite all the grief that demented computer gave me, managed to get control in the end.

****

Okay, I'll admit it, I mainly wrote this because I got nostalgic over Processing.... And it's impossible to deny motivation to write about a scene this great, it's up there with some of my all time favorites.

(I mean, I wrote an entire book about this episode. I may sorta kinda love it.)

Although SO many of the episodes are great! Episode 3 from season 2 is probably my second favorite, and then there's like three different episodes vying for third.

Which leads me to ask what's your guys favorite? The darker more depressing ones? The finale ones where Jesse somehow manages to triumph in the end?

And well, that's all I got for now. See ya next time with either a request or whatever weirdness springs out of my mind!