The end of the year was positively flying by. Now that it was spring, now that Caiti was finally enjoying herself just a little bit, it seemed like each day at Hogwarts was gone faster than the one before it and she was starting to feel sorry that she had wished this year away.

The final Hogsmeade weekend had come up already and she was waiting outside the Three Broomsticks for Alora Serpen, the potential mentor she had been writing to since the end of March. It was a perfect day out: cool, but sunny. Little birds fluttered around, landing on the cobblestone stone street in little huddles, hopped and chirped a few times before taking off again. Caiti wished Marlowe had been able to come today, but he had a match every weekend this time of year. He hadn't played again since that first one, but there had been buzz about him — and her — in the papers and magazines again afterward.

Not surprisingly, a photographer had taken a picture of them kissing after the match and it had been widely printed. She had been teased about this mercilessly all over school, but she couldn't bring herself to care, because even the gossip magazines only had positive things to say about him now.

A breeze blew her hair in her face, and as she was untangling it from her eyelashes, she saw a woman approaching. She was young — in her early thirties, Caiti guessed — and had sleek black hair pulled into a loose, low bun. She wore purple robes and dark lipstick and Caiti suddenly felt very little-girlish.

"You must be Caiti," she said, holding out her hand.

For some reason, at the sound of her name — at the sound of Caiti and not Caitlin, not Miss O'Connell — that nervous flutter she had felt at first vanished. Caiti shook her hand.

"Yes. It's so nice to finally meet you," she said.

"Let's go grab a drink," she said. "I'm so glad we could chat in person. I've got so many things I'd love to talk to you about."

So they went inside and sat at a little table near a window where it was bright and sunny. With drinks in front of them, Alora asked, "So are you looking forward to being done with school? Or are you completely dreading it like I was?"

Caiti smiled. "Both?"

Alora laughed.

"This year has kind of sucked to be honest. All my close friends left last year. But it's still weird to think about not coming back."

"It'll take some time to sink in. I don't think I realized I was done until the train was leaving the next year and I wasn't on it. Luckily, you've got things in the works to keep you occupied, because I didn't have a clue what I was doing those first few years."

"I mean I don't really have a clue what I'm doing either," Caiti admitted.

But Alora just smiled. "The best potion makers never do."

They chatted about her presentation for a while and about what she'd been up to since then. Alora asked her questions, not like she was interviewing her, but like she was really actually interested in the content of her research, like she thought what Caiti was doing was fascinating and meaningful.

She was supportive and helpful when Caiti said she felt like all she had was these disconnected ideas she didn't really know what to do with, and she gave her practical advice for what to do immediately moving forward.

She reminded Caiti a lot of Professor Pym. They weren't exactly alike. Alora was much more talkative, much brighter, but already, Caiti could tell she had the same quiet way of pushing. Caiti could tell that Alora would help and guide but not try to take over. She would, like Professor Pym always had, let Caiti do the work. She would let this stay her project.

This made Caiti feel settled and calm in a way she had rarely felt all that year. "I want to work with you," she blurted out, right in the middle of everything. "I don't want to talk to anyone else."

Alora folded her hands and smiled this bright-eyed, close-lipped smile.

She didn't say anything.

"I mean, if you'd still like to work with me," Caiti said a little more quietly.

"Of course," she said. "I look forward to it."

Caiti let out an actual, audible sigh of relief.

—-

"How're things with you and Sean?" Margaret asked, a little breathless. "Still good?"

Now that the weather was warming up, they'd started running twice a week again, but had kept up their yoga once a week. It was nice to be able to run again, not because running was particularly enjoyable, but because afterwards, they would walk to cool down and that gave them time to chat outside the library, away from the kids.

"Yeah," said Evelyn. "We've been fine, I think."

"You think?" Margaret brushed a curl off her face and wiped the sweat off her forehead.

Evelyn didn't answer immediately. It was hard to explain. To anyone else, they probably did look like everything was going well. They had been to Margaret's for a game night twice now and had even hosted Peter and Margaret at their flat once more recently.

Sean was attentive to her and they sat close and laughed with each other and probably seemed like any other happy couple.

And it wasn't that they weren't happy either. She was really enjoying spending time with Sean. She loved spending a half an hour after dinner almost every night taking Barry for a walk, hands held. She loved falling asleep beside him instead of alone. She loved that they talked all the time and that it was easy and natural and fun. But they weren't one hundred percent back to where they used to be.

"I mean things are good," she said. "Sometimes I think they're better than they were before. At least since before last year. But... I don't know. It's like... well, Sean was sleeping on the couch for a long time. And he hasn't been anymore. Not for a month now. So we fall asleep together every night. Like..." Evelyn shook her head. She was getting worked up now. "Like actually touching. Every night. And he just-" She stopped walking, staring out at the path ahead of her like it had only just revealed to her why she felt so unsettled. "And he still hasn't kissed me," she finished. "But it feels like he should have."

Margaret stopped with her. She tipped her head to one side and thought. "Have you told him that?"

"Of course not," said Evelyn.

"Why not?"

This was a more puzzling question.

"Well, I've done everything," she said. "I've pushed for everything. I want him to take the lead on something."

Margaret started walking again. "Maybe it's not that you want it," she said. "Maybe it's that you need him to."

Evelyn couldn't speak for a long time after that. Those words had knocked the wind right out of her.

Just before she and Margaret said goodbye at the edge of the park, Evelyn's phone buzzed in her pocket. This was quite a surprise, because it never usually did anything. She only had a phone at all because her parents insisted. They wanted to be able to get hold of her easier since they weren't in possession of an owl and phones were much more familiar to them. No amount of explaining had convinced them that this wasn't even practical, because Evelyn was always surrounded my magic and the phone wouldn't behave properly in that environment.

Sure enough, the text she'd just received had been sent four days ago and had only now come through.

She tapped it open and read her mum's message: Come over when you can. Your uni letter has arrived.

She had included a series of emojis that make Evelyn's stomach start doing gymnastics. There was a party hat, confetti, three happy faces, and another face blowing on a noisemaker.

"What is it?" asked Margaret. Evelyn showed her the phone.

"It must have been a big envelope," she said, not even sure how to feel.

"What's a big envelope mean?"

"Means you've got in. They send a small one if they say no. The big one has all sorts of information in."

Margaret's eyes lit up. "Oh my god," she said, throwing her arms around Evelyn. "That's amazing! You've got to go see it straight away. That's so exciting!"

"Is it?"

"What do you mean, 'is it?' Of course it is!"

"I just don't know if I want to do it," Evelyn said. "It's scary. I haven't been around muggles in so long. What if I slip up?"

"You'll be fine. If I could manage dating Peter for over a month before I told him I was a witch and he never found out, then you can definitely manage not to let something slip. Plus, you know how to work this thing and that's more than I could do," she added, nodding at the phone.

"How did you manage not to have a phone and date a muggle?"

"I told him I'd dropped it in the toilet and I had to save before I could buy a new one."

Evelyn cracked a smile.

"Go," said Margaret. "I'll see you tomorrow and you can tell me all about it."

—-

It had been an acceptance after all. Despite Margaret's enthusiasm and her parents' pride, Evelyn still felt unsure. Something about stepping back into the muggle world felt like failing to make the magical world fit her. She knew it didn't have to be that cut and dry. She could be part of both. They were both important to her. But after eight years of trying to prove she could adapt to a completely different lifestyle she once hadn't even known existed, it did feel strange to think about acting like a muggle again.

"Hey," said Sean who was washing his hands in the kitchen sink when Evelyn got back home. "You're home later than I thought. How far did you run?"

"I wasn't running," she said. "I mean I was, but not for the last hour. I went to my parents house."

"Oh," said Sean. "How are they?" He still, she knew, felt a little awkward about her parents, neither of whom completely trusted him yet. Her mum had strongly encouraged her to break up with him once and for all and hadn't been altogether happy when Evelyn told her things were getting better.

"Good." Evelyn shrugged off her jacket and went to stand on the opposite side of the counter. "I uhm... the reason I went over there was to get my acceptance letter. I just found out I got into uni."

Sean's eyes widened and he quickly hung the dishtowel he'd been drying his hands on back over the oven handle and hurried to her to give her a hug. "I knew you'd get in," he said. "That's so great to hear. Are you excited?"

Evelyn didn't feel like getting into her misgivings so she just said. "Thanks," and hugged him back.

She couldn't help thinking what an obvious moment this would have been to kiss her and he hadn't done it.

—-

That night, Evelyn got in bed before Sean did so she could read. Sean joined her twenty or so minutes later, scooting towards the middle of the bed with his own book. He stretched one arm out around her, flipping to the bookmarked page with his free hand, and Evelyn leaned into his shoulder.

They'd done this a lot recently and it was nice. It was like countless nights they had spent side by side working through homework in the common room except without the constant background noise.

Evelyn finished the last two pages of her chapter and then she stared at the first page of the next one, not quite able to take in any of the words.

She stared until Sean reached the end of his chapter. He moved very gingerly as he closed the book and set it on the nightstand, and then he turned back to her and his hand went towards her book, like he meant to take it from her. Evelyn pulled her bookmark out of the back and stuck it in place.

"Oh," he said, startled. "I thought you fell asleep."

"I was just thinking," Evelyn said, which was not entirely true. Her mind had been pretty blank.

She reached towards her own nightstand to put the book down and then settled back against the pillows, sitting upright again. They were shoulder to shoulder now.

Barry, who was fast asleep on his bed on the floor, rolled over and groaned.

Sean cracked a smile.

"Don't laugh at him, Sean. Barry leads a difficult life."

Sean smiled more and this made Evelyn smile.

They looked at each other.

Please kiss me, Evelyn thought. It felt like he might. His smile faded a little and she thought his gaze might have flicked to her mouth. Wasn't that what movies always said boys would do when they wanted to kiss you? She remembered watching a romantic movie with a friend at a sleepover not long before she'd gotten her Hogwarts letter, both of them giggling madly over the kiss scene at the end. It was the first time she'd really given much thought to the idea of boys and dating and crushes, but she had found nothing to relate to at the time.

Please, she thought again. Margaret was right. She needed him to do it. She needed him to take the lead on something.

But Sean didn't kiss her.

He just turned off the light and laid back down. He started to open his arm for her again, but Evelyn was too disappointed to bear it. She got up.

"Where are you going?" Sean asked.

"I'm going to get a drink of water," she said, which was a stupid excuse since she had a full glass of water right next to her on the nightstand, but she couldn't think of anything better.

It was dark in the room, but she thought she saw Sean's eyes flick in the direction of where the cup sat. "Right," he said.

Evelyn walked out of the room before she said anything else stupid. She felt like a complete moron. And not just for coming up with the world's worst lie. She was a terrible liar. Everyone knew it. She felt stupid for expecting that Sean would ever, ever kiss her again if she didn't do it first. She knew she should feel grateful that they were friends again, that the possibility of being more than friends was there at all, but it felt like she'd been waiting such a long time for him to show it was what he wanted, too.

Maybe it wasn't. Maybe it never had been. Maybe Sean had only kissed her that night they'd been on prefect duty because she'd asked him too. Maybe then he'd felt stuck and really all he'd ever wanted was what they'd already had.

She stood out in the living room and stared at Barry's empty dog bed on the floor. Sean had splurged on two of the best ones he could find, only for Barry to lay on the hard floor half the time. He did like to curl up in the one in the bedroom at night, but as soft furnishings went, he really preferred to be on the couch.

Evelyn stood and stared and thought about Barry for no explainable reason until she heard footsteps behind her and a bit of jingling and then she felt a cold, wet nose on the back of her leg.

"Hi Barry," she said softly, and she knelt down to scratch his head. As she turned around, she realized that Sean had come out of the bedroom, too.

"Are you mad at me?" he asked.

"No," Evelyn said, but she didn't look up.

"Then why are you out here?"

"I was just--" Evelyn said. She glanced up at him, but looked back to Barry quickly. "I don't know," she said.

"Did I do something?" he asked.

Evelyn didn't know how to answer. It wasn't something he'd done. It was what he hadn't done. And there had been so many opportunities, so many moments where he could have and it would have been so natural.

"It just seemed like—" Sean said. "I don't know. You seemed mad."

"I'm not mad."

"Okay." Sean took a deep breath. He paused. "Can you just— can you just look at me for a second? 'Cause I don't really believe you."

At that, Evelyn couldn't help but laugh. Slowly she lifted her head to look at him again.

"I'm not mad," she said again. She stood up. Barry grumbled his discontent and Evelyn started to stoop back down to usher him along. "Let's just go back to bed," she said. She'd been overreacting.

But when she neared the threshold of the short hallway, Sean stopped her. Before she'd quitte caught up to things, Sean's hand was on her cheek, lifting her face back towards him and Evelyn froze.

They looked at each other for so long Evelyn started to feel lightheaded.

"Ev," he said. He opened his mouth to say something else, but seemed to decide against it, because he just muttered, "Forget it," and then, finally, Sean kissed her. It wasn't anything like how he had kissed her the previous year. It wasn't timid.

When they broke apart, it was only for a second, and then he kissed her again, this time twisting his hand into her hair.

Evelyn had been almost too paralyzed to move, but now her hand found its way to his shoulder and then, gaining a little confidence, she wrapped both arms around his neck.

"How long have you been waiting?" Sean asked.

"For you to kiss me?"

He nodded.

"Forever," she said with a little smile. "Like since we got Barry probably."

"Damn it," Sean whispered,dropping his head back. "I was gonna ask... but then I thought-"

"That's Marlowe's line."

"Yeah." He gave her a sheepish grin and they both laughed. He kissed her again. She couldn't quite believe it.

He seemed so confident. It had always felt like he was just a little afraid of her before.

"I'm such an idiot," Sean said as he pulled back again. "Like I thought you... but then I wasn't sure—"

"It's okay," she laughed.

"There were like a thousand opportunities, too," Sean said, letting go of her. He put his hand on his forehead and walked away with this look on his face like he had never been more exasperated with himself.

Evelyn sat down on the edge of the couch and Barry laid his snout on her knees. She couldn't stop smiling.

"I mean seriously. That night we went to the river. When we walked back from Margaret's the other day. Literally every time we left for work. And every time we got home. Tonight when you said you got into uni. Oh my god. I really blew that one."

"Sean, it's okay," Evelyn laughed. "The suspense makes it better."

"You've seriously been waiting that long? And you never said?"

Evelyn tipped her head to one side. "I just... needed to know it was what you actually wanted."

"Oh my god," Sean said again. "Ev. Of course it is. Are you kidding? Of course it is."

Evelyn felt dizzy again.

He came and sat next to her and he just stared with his mouth open a little.

"I.... hate that you had any doubt," he said. "I mean I guess I get why. I know I... I deserve—"

"No you don't," Evelyn interrupted. "You don't deserve anything like that. It's not because of... it's not about the way you acted when you weren't yourself. That wouldn't be fair. I think I've always questioned it."

"What?"

Sean's face looked so surprised, so sad at these words that Evelyn wished she hadn't said them at all.

"I sometimes thought I'd pushed you into it. I mean, the first time you kissed me, it was an accident," she said. "And then you only did it again because I asked you to. I was never sure if—"

"Ev, you're the best person I know. My favorite person. And despite my somewhat recent behavior, I am completely in love with you. I always have been."

Evelyn turned away. Tears had just welled up in her eyes.

"It's my fault that that wasn't clear," he said.

Evelyn scratched Barry behind the ears and sucked her bottom lip in in an attempt to keep her tears under control.

"You believe me right?" asked Sean nervously, and then, with a bit of a smile in his voice, he added, "'Cause I can kiss you again if you aren't sure."

"I believe you," Evelyn said. She took a deep breath. "Just don't disappear on me again, please."

"No," said Sean. "No, there will be no repeats of that fiasco."

"Okay, kiss me again," said Evelyn.

And this time, when he did, Barry jumped up onto the sofa and sat himself down between them, wrenching them apart which sent them both into hysterics.