summary: an imagine based off of the song "small bump" by ed sheeran. (i thought i'd throw in some angst)

pairing: jonah x female!reader

triggers: hospitals, mentions of blood, miscarriage.

link to original post: https://youngbloodseavey.tumblr.com/post/166853425833/small-bump-jonah-marais

linked above is the song, i highly recommend listening to the song while reading.

disclaimer: i myself have no experiences with miscarriage. i've done as much research as i can on the topic, so i hope that there are no inaccuracies in the writing of this imagine. but if there are, please know that i mean no disrespect, and i'm truly sorry if there are any inaccuracies in any part of this imagine.

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you're just a small bump unborn, in four months you're brought to life,

the  day jonah had found out y/n was pregnant was the best day of his life.  he was going to have a child, a little angel he was going to love and  care for his entire life. he had picked up y/n and spun her around, the  pure joy he felt rushing through his body like a drug. he was going to  be a father.

it had been five months since that day. but the joy the couple felt had only grown with each passing day.

"please  lay down mrs. frantzich, and the doctor will be here in just a few  moments," a nurse gestured to the medical table, giving the couple a  warm smile before leaving the room.

y/n climbed on top of  the cot, being careful to not even disturb the small bump that was  forming on her stomach. she laid down, settling herself on the cot as  jonah took a seat next to her.

she took jonah's hand,  placing it in hers as he smiled. today was the day. the day they were  going to find out the gender of their child.

"mr and mrs frantzich?" a middle aged woman in a doctor's coat opened the door, sending them a smile.

"that would be us," jonah replied, squeezing y/n's hand affectionately.

"well  my name is dr. greene, and i will be your ob-gyn today," the woman  reached out and shook both y/n and jonah's hands before settling herself  in a desk chair next to the sonogram machine.

dr. greene  asked the normal questions about y/n's health, her diet, all the medical  questions before she slathered the cool gel onto y/n's stomach and  pressed the wand to her abdomen.

"let's see," the doctor  mumbled, moving the wand around until they saw the fetus-shaped blob in  the screen monitor. "that's your child right there,"

y/n's  eyes began tearing up, her heart swelling at the sight of her child, of  jonah's child. she grasped at jonah's hand as she looked at him, seeing  the same look of adoration plastered on his face as his gaze was  fixated on the screen.

"would you like to find out the gender today?" dr. greene asked the couple, who looked to each other before nodding.

"we  would want nothing more," jonah replied, his stomach turning in  nervousness. dr. greene studied the screen for a moment before turning  back to the couple with a grin on her face.

"congratulations, you are expecting a baby girl."

you might be left with my hair, but you'll have your mother's eyes,

"i hope she gets your eyes," y/n commented to jonah as they walked out of the doctor's office after their appointment.

"nah, i think she'll have your eyes, but my hair," he replied, pressing a kiss into y/n's hair.

they reached the car, jonah opening the door for y/n before rushing back over to his side of the car.

"i can't believe we're having a girl," y/n breathed out, staring out the window as the scenery blurred.

"a  baby girl, a little girl we can spoil and care for and love until the  end of time," jonah's free hand slipped into y/n's and he smiled  brightly. they were having a child. this was real life, and they  couldn't be happier.

i'll hold your body in my hands, be as gentle as i can,

"i  can't wait to hold her, to look down at her beautiful face," jonah told  y/n as they laid in bed, one of his arms wrapped around her waist as  his hand rubbed her baby bump.

"you're going to be an amazing father jo," y/n hummed, looking up at her her husband.

"i  hope i will, but one thing i know for sure is that our little angel is  going to live the best life she can" he affirmed her, bringing a smile  to y/n's face.

but for now you're a scan of my unmade plans, a small bump in four months, you're brought to life.

jonah's eyes caught the photo of the sonogram on the nightstand, his heart melting at the sight.

that  black and white picture was his future. the little blob in the center  was his angel, a mixture of the love of his life and himself. she was a  beautiful unknown, a person growing day by day.

"only four more months baby," jonah mumbled, feeling the warmth of y/n's stomach against his palm. four more months.

i'll whisper quietly, i'll give you nothing but truth,

"i  know you haven't been born yet, but i wanted you to know that you, my  angel, will have the best life i can provide for you," jonah was  face-to-face with y/n's baby bump, whispering to his unborn child. y/n  was taking a nap, and jonah found it was the perfect time to just talk.  talking to his unborn baby was a little weird, but comforting all the  same to jonah.

"and you're going to struggle in life,  because that's just how life is. we all have our ups and downs, but in  the end, you'll find where you're meant to be. everything happens for a  reason my angel,"

if you're not inside me, i'll put my future inside of you,

"life  is gonna be hard sometimes. but as long as i'm around, i'll be there to  protect you. nothing will ever hurt you, because no matter what, i'll  be there for you,"

"and i promise, with my whole heart,  that i will do anything for you to be happy. i would give up the world  as long as you are safe, healthy, but most importantly happy. because  sometimes it feels like all happiness has disappeared, like it blew away  like the wind in a storm. but storms pass, my angel, and the skies  become blue once more. and your sweet mother," jonah's eyes trailed back  up to y/n's sleeping face, a smile spreading across his features. "is  my blue skies. but you, you're my sunshine."

you are my one and only, and you can wrap your fingers 'round my, thumb and hold me tight,

"and  i can't wait to hold you in my arms, to have your tiny fingers wrapped  around mine. and i'll hold you as tight as i can, because although you  haven't been born, you have already become my entire world," jonah's  voice trailed off as y/n fidgeted around, her eyes fluttering open,  revealing the beautiful color underneath.

"what are you  doing babe?" y/n mumbled sleepily, seeing her husband at eye-level with  her baby bump. jonah scooted himself back up, now at level with y/n.

"just  talking to our little angel," he smiled, pressing a kiss to y/n's  forehead as she yawned again. jonah's arm wrapped itself around y/n's  shoulders, pulling her close as she cuddled herself into his chest.

'four more months,' he thought. four more months.

you were just a small bump unborn,

it was all a blur from the moment it happened.

a  rush of blood, a searing pain. screaming, crying, sirens. it didn't  seem real, none of it seemed real. he didn't want it to seem real.

the  white, sterile walls stared jonah straight in the eye as he sat  anxiously in the waiting room. his mind was running a million miles an  hour as his head hung low, his hands on his face.

"mr.  frantzich," jonah's head shot up at the sound of his name, seeing a  middle-aged man in a doctor's coat approach him. "please, follow me,"  jonah jumped out of the chair, rushing to follow the doctor. his heart  raced as he followed the doctor.

they stopped outside of a door to a room, the doctor turning to jonah.

"you  may see your wife now," jonah didn't have to be told twice, he quickly  thanked the doctor and rushed inside of the room. the air felt stale,  the only noises being y/n's soft breaths and the beeping of machinery.

"hey  babe," y/n smiled weakly, gesturing for jonah to sit down next to her.  she was dressed in a hospital gown, her hair spread across the pillow.

"how  are you feeling baby," jonah asked, settling himself in a hospital  chair right next to y/n, himself taking her hand and lightly kissing the  back of it.

"physically, i feel fine, i'm just in a bit of  pain. emotionally, i'm so fucking terrified," she whispered, tears  forming in the corners of her eyes. "the baby," she didn't have to say  much more to break down in tears.

"sh, the baby is going to  be fine," jonah consoled his close to hysteric wife, but even he didn't  know if the baby was going to be okay. he could only hope that his  words were true.

"we don't know that jonah! there was so  much blood," she whimpered, the image of the bloodstained sheets  ingrained in her brain. "i've had spotting before, but it was never that  bad,"

"think positive y/n, that's all that going to  get us through this." his kissed her cheek. a knock sounded, the doctor  that led jonah to the room earlier walking in.

jonah's  stomach immediately dropped at the sight of the expression on the  doctor's face, he knew something was wrong. y/n's grip on his hand  tightened, her nerves showing in her face.

the doctor took in a deep breath before speaking. "i'm so sorry, but i'm afraid that you have suffered from a miscarriage."

just four months torn from life,

jonah's heart stopped. it didn't seem, real.

how could this be? his little angel, torn from him before they could even meet.

"i'm  very sorry for your loss, i'll leave you two to yourselves now," the  doctor bowed his head, leaving the room. the moment the doctor had left,  y/n had broken down.

"h-how could this happen? i-i," she sobbed, clinging desperately to jonah as tight as she could.

"i-i, i don't know," jonah whispered, his mind still blank. his angel, the angel he could never meet.

no  more words were said, the only sounds being y/n's heavy sobs. jonah's  own tears began streaming down his face as he held his wife tightly to  his body. his throat felt dry, it felt as if he lungs couldn't work any  more.

and the couple sat there for what felt like  hours, clutching at each other's bodies, looking for some sort of  comfort for the burning pain settling itself in their hearts.

maybe you were needed up there,

why, why, why.

what did he do to deserve this? what did y/n do to deserve this?

the endless pain, the pure numbness in their minds and hearts. why did their little angel have to leave before she even arrived?

reality  hadn't seem to set itself in, but he knew it was real. the  unadulterated agony was real. the tears streaming down both his and  y/n's faces were real.it was all real. but he didn't want to accept it  as real.

but he knew, deep inside his heart, that everything happens for a reason.

and his little angel had finally returned home.

but we're still unaware as why.