Chapter 10

            Darren pushes past Elly; he's still talking and hasn't noticed me in the corner. "I'm sorry, Elly. I didn't mean to hit you; I love you."

            He's tall, dirty-blonde, and is built. He could easily kick my ass, but I don't care. Rage is fueling me.

            "Get out." I step out from the shadows. "Get out of here and don't you ever try to contact Elly again!" My fists are clenched and my heart is racing; I want to destroy this scumbag.

            "Who the fuck are you? Wait," Darren smirks and turns to Elly. "Is this Declan? Is this the guy you cheated on me with? You definitely lowered your standards with this one."

            "Darren, I want you to leave. Go." Elly says forcefully, pointing outside.

            "I don't think so, Ells." Darren walks over to me. I match him in height, just not muscle.

            I look him right in the eye. "Get out before I call the cops. You must be insane coming back here. Do you think that you can hit her and she'll just forgive you?"

            Darren's eyes flare. "She made me do it! I would never hit her on purpose." Is this guy stupid?

            "Do you hear yourself, you're blaming her for your actions. You're pathetic; take responsibility for once." We are glaring at each other. Elly comes over and tries to pull Darren away.

            "Please, just go. Leave Declan alone." Darren shoves her away, causing her to fall into the coffee table and causing me to lose it.

My fist flies up and I catch him in the jaw. Darren stumbles back a little; stunned. It doesn't take him long to recover, though. He come at me full force and shoves me into the wall, my head smacks the wall so hard that I hear the wall crack behind me.

            "Stop it Darren! Stop!" Elly screams by the door.

            "Why don't you stop defending this trash, slut." Darren brings his fist down on my face, almost knocking me out. My vision is blurry, but I see Elly pull out her phone and start to call someone. Darren notices to and snatches the phone from her and throws it.

            "You don't want me to hurt your lover so you can continue fucking him on the side, is that it Elly?"  Darren has her by the arm and she's begging him to let her go and to leave.  I stumble over, trying to get to Elly. Darren just turns and slams his fist into my stomach.

I fall to the floor and Elly screams again. I can barely breathe or move and I'm unable to help Elly. Her crying is killing me; I need to help her.

Darren shakes Elly. "Look at him! He's weak! What do you see in him?" Elly finally gets her arm of out Darren's grip and runs over to me.

"He's not you! That's what I see in him, he would never put his hands on me or make me feel like I'm not good enough." Elly goes back over to Darren; challenging him. I'm afraid he'll hit her again, but I can't even get back on my feet.

Elly starts yelling again. "He'd never beat someone up for no reason, he'd never make me feel guilty about things that are out of my control, he'd never get mad at me because I'm 18 and don't have my life together. This whole relationship was bullshit Darren and I want you out of my life now!" Tears are falling down Elly's face, but she stands fierce and beautiful.

I regain my footing and stand next to her. I'm still dizzy as hell, but I'll always do my best to protect her. Darren glares at us and then heads to the door. He turns back right before he leaves.

"You're right, this whole relationship was bullshit and when we weren't together I enjoyed the company of many different women." He chuckles and slams the door behind him. Elly stares at the closed door.

"He was bluffing, I could tell. If he didn't care about you then he wouldn't have beat my ass." I speak quietly because it hurts to talk.

"I know...you should sit down Declan." I oblige and sit down. My head hurts like a motherfucker. "Should we call the cops?" Elly asks me.

I shake my head. "I'm not a big cop guy, but if you want to call and get a restraining order or something like that, then I'm for it." Restraining orders are good up to a point and at the end of the day, a piece of paper isn't going to stop him. And as much as I'd like to see him locked up, the cops around here are lazy and won't arrest him; claiming they need more evidence. I've experienced that firsthand with my father.

"I don't know, maybe we just skip he hassle for now. If he hurts me again, I'll press charges." Elly looks at the door again.

"Elly, this is the first time he's hit you, right?"

"Yeah, I mean, he's shoved me and shaken me before. This morning was the first time he actually hurt me." Elly looks so broken, I want to be the guy who can fix her and hopefully she'll let me.

"Elly, someone who loves you should never put his hands on you aggressively, period. You deserve so much better, you need to know your worth. Actually, your worth is immeasurable so that's impossible." Elly smiles and leans on my shoulder.

"I'm so sorry Darren attacked you."

I chuckle. "Elly Jacobs." I turn and kiss the top of her head. "I would take five-hundred thousand beatings for you any day."

"Night too?" Elly asks jokingly.

I answer her back, dead serious. "Any night, too."

Elly jolts up unexpectedly. "Are you hungry? I haven't had breakfast and it doesn't look like we're making it to school today."

As soon as she said hungry, my stomach growled. So, I guess that answers that question. I stand up, intending on helping her, but my vision blurs and I wobble a bit. 

"You stay here! I can make it on my own." Her last statement makes me feel sad; I do believe she can make I on her on, but she doesn't have to. Also, I believe my mind just made that statement into something it's not...maybe.

"You could do that or you could let me help and I could make my world-famous eggs," I offer.

"Ooo! Sounds good. I guess you can help then."

In the kitchen, I open the fridge and it's basically empty. There are some eggs and a couple of pieces of bacon. That will have to do.

"I'm running pretty low. Darren was going to get me a couple of things before he..." Elly stops and changes the subject. "My aunt will be dropping off food tomorrow, though."

"It doesn't look like you have anything for dinner tonight."

Elly grabs a pan for the bacon and avoids looking at me. "I'll be fine Declan."

"Elly! You need to take care of yourself. You won't be fine without food. Stop saying you'll be fine! It's okay to not be fine, to be weak; I'll be there for you. I want to be there for you." I can't take her lying about being fine, I know she isn't.

Elly looks at me, surprised. "Okay, Declan." I put the eggs down and sweep her into my arms like I've been dying to do.

"We can go to Jonah's tonight. His dad loves cooking big dinners for us all." I look down at her big brown eyes and my heart swells. I feel so lucky, my body hurts, but I'm so lucky to have this beautiful disaster in my life.

"Are you sure his dad would be okay with that?" Elly's eyes are alight with hope.

"He would be more than okay with it and Jonah has a little sister that will love you," I tell her honestly. Jonah's dad loves having visitors and he loves to talk their ears off too. I'm sure Elly will have a great time.

"Okay, you convinced me!" Elly slips out of my arms and starts the bacon, humming to herself. I end up right beside her, listening to her sweet tune and making breakfast together.

"But what if he doesn't like me?" Elly whines. We're walking to Jonah's house and Elly is a bit anxious.

"Elly, I told you, he will love you! He likes everyone." I'm trying to reassure her, but she isn't listening.

Elly huffs. "How can he like everyone?"

I sigh. "Elly, Jonah's mom committed suicide shortly after his little sister was born. She had post-partum depression and Andrew he...he felt like it was his fault. Now he tries to make everyone who steps foot in his home, happy." My words quiet Elly. I didn't want to tell her; I just didn't see how she'd get it if I didn't.

"Oh."

"Elly, I didn't tell you that to make you feel bad. It's okay to want the pain to end, but it's not okay that you tried to kill yourself." We're outside of Jonah's right now. This conversation needs to happen; Elly needs to know this.

I continue. "There's so many people who would have been affected by your death. You're loved, whether you know it or not. So many people would have blamed themselves, like I did, like Andrew does."

Elly wraps her arms around herself. "I'm sorry. I don't know what else there is to say."

"That you won't do it again; that you'll try to get help. I'm so worried about you Elly. You have been like a zombie lately."

"I won't; it was a mistake and it was stupid." Elly takes my hand. "I'll get help, I was going to right when I got out of the hospital, but Darren told me not to."

"Why?" Why wouldn't he want her to feel better, be happier.

"He felt insulted by it because he thought it was his job to make me happy and using someone or something else to help me, meant that he failed."

"That's dumb," I scoff.

Elly gives me a stern look. "No, it isn't. He was hurt by what I did too. Just like you, he thought what I did was his fault. No matter what he did to me, he still loved me in his way. He didn't understand that my depression wasn't something he could fix by making me smile."

"Why are you even defending him? He hit you, he beat the shit out of me!" Did she forget the what her face and arms looked like? Did she forget how she was screaming and begging him to stop, but he wouldn't?

"Because he did love me. When we first got together, I never would have imagined it would end like this." Elly sits on the curb and picks grass out of the side walk cracks.

"The first half of our relationship was like a fairy tale; I truly felt like a princess. As time went on we got to know each other's faults and short comings. For me, it came naturally to accept his, but he didn't know how to accept mine. He lived his life in a perfect, small world." Elly tosses a handful of grass in the road.

I don't want to hear about Darren's sob story. Nothing will change my mind about him. I will force myself to listen because Elly needs someone in her life that will listen. I sit down next to her on the curb and wait for her to keep talking.

"He only ever knew perfect, Declan. So, he tried to mold me into that and when he couldn't, he became frustrated. He was trying to accept that I couldn't be everything he wanted, but it changed him. Shortly after, is when you came into my life." Elly smiles thoughtfully at the grass in her hand.

"Declan, I'm not making excuses for him."

I scoff again. "Sure sounds like it."

"I know it does. I just wanted to explain that a lot of the things he's done aren't that crazy. It's easy break under the pressure if you were never taught how to handle it. Regardless, what he did was wrong and nothing excuses that."

"Ok, I understand." And I do, but I still don't like him. "Let's go inside. We've dealt with enough hard stuff for one day."

We go inside and Jonah is in the living room playing a game, but he pauses it when he sees us.

"Holy shit, what happened to you two?" Jonah says in surprise.

"Yeah, what did happen to you kids?" Andrew walks in from the kitchen.

I look at Elly. I don't know if she wants me to say anything.

"Uh, Hi, I'm Elly. What happened was...my boyfriend...my ex-boyfriend. Declan was defending me and got hurt in the process."

"What? Declan, why didn't you call? Did you guys call the cops."

I speak this time. "Well, I didn't want to deal with the cops. We're both okay and the cops wouldn't have done much."

Andrew looks at us disapprovingly. "What if he comes back?"

"He won't," Elly says, with a sad look on her face. Does she miss him?

Andrew looks like he wants to argue more on the subject, but he notices Elly's demeanor. "Alright, just if there is a next time, someone better call me."

"Now, I don't believe we've met. My name is Andrew," Andrew extends a hand to Elly.

She shakes it and smiles. "I'm Elly, nice to meet you." Her voice is quiet, but I can tell she's happy to be here.

"Nice to meet you too, Elly. I hope you guys are hungry because I just finished making dinner." Andrew says while leading us into the kitchen.

"We definitely are," I answer. We didn't have lunch because Elly has nothing there to eat now.

On the kitchen table sits a steaming pan of lasagna. I love Andrew's lasagna, I've never had anything like it my whole life. I'm ready to dig in.

"Hi!" Jonah's sister Tara, says from the table. "Wanna sit next to me?" Tara looks at Elly.

"Sure." Elly sits next to Tara and I sit next to her. Andrew busies himself with cutting squares out of the lasagna and passing them off. Jonah sits across from me. I know he's dying to get more information about what happened, but he'll have to wait until later.

"What's your name?" Elly inquires.

"My name is Tara and I'm in kindergarten," Tara says, matter-of-factly.

"That's awesome! My name is Elly."

"Whoa! That's a cool name! Tara is a dumb name!" Tara pouts.

"Hey, I picked that name out!" Andrew feigns hurt and we all laugh.

"Thank you, but I think Tara is a super-cool name. Way cooler than mine, that's for sure."

"Really?" Tara raises her eyebrow. It's amazing how much Tara looks and acts like Jonah's mother. Her name was Diane, she was tall, pale and had midnight black hair. Diane was amazing and accepting, but she had an attitude that would render the strongest person helpless.

"Of course!"

"Wanna see my baby dolls after dinner?" Tara must really like Elly, her dolls are sacred; she never even asked me if I wanted to see them.

And that's how the rest of dinner goes. Tara asks Elly a million questions, Andrew cracks lame dad jokes and we all pig out on lasagna. Afterwards Jonah and I go to his room while Elly is playing dolls with Tara.

Jonah closes the door. "Darren hit Elly, then you?"

"Yup," I nod. "That's what the emergency was. I walked in and she was covered in bruises and shit. Then Darren came back and tried to apologize."

"Wow...how did you two end up fighting?" Jonah sits at his desk.

"He pushed Elly into a coffee table and I punched him in the face. After that, he whooped my ass." I'm embarrassed about that last part, but Jonah knows I don't regularly fight.

"Wow," Jonah says again. "You've got some serious balls man. I can't believe he hit her; I'm sorry I made you go to that party."

"Why? We had fun, neither of us knew that Darren would hit her."

"That's true, and I did my first keg stand. Did you see?" Jonah asks excitedly.

"I vaguely remember a nerdy guy being held in the air, upside down."

Jonah laughs. "That's me."

"Seems like a cool bunch of people," I tell him.

"They are," Jonah says and then his eyes get big. "You should apply to the school. They're still accepting applications."

"I don't know. I don't have any money for college." I had just planned on getting a simple job, I don't have any big dreams or anything like that.

"Financial aid, duh!" He seems so enthused. I don't know why he's bringing this up now. We've never talked about college or going together.

"Wouldn't it just be a waste of time and money? I don't have any dreams of being a doctor or teacher." I really just don't want to go.

"That's the great thing about college, you can take general studies and join clubs and figure out if there's anything you excel at or enjoy." He sounds like a television commercial.

"I'll think about it."

"Well, think about it quickly. They don't accept applications after May; that's a little over three months away," Jonah nags. I know he's gonna get me to go...he tends to get his way and I guess an extra degree wouldn't hurt too bad.

The door swings open. "Hey guys, what's up." Elly walks in and sits on Jonah's recliner.

"Nothing, how was playing dolls with Tara?" I ask wryly.

"It was fun, she has like ten baby dolls! That's so crazy."

"She's kind of obsessed with baby dolls." Jonah laughs and turns on his computer.

"Yeah, she fell asleep while we were playing, that's why I'm here now. She's adorable; I wish I had a little sister."

"She is great. I know a lot of people can't stand their siblings, but Tara is sweet."

"She isn't an annoying tag-a-long either. Tara pretty much sticks to herself," I add. 

"That's cool. Declan, I was going to go home. I'll see you later though," Elly says out of the blue.

"I can walk you home." I don't want to be without her just yet; I don't want to be without her at all.

"Okay." Elly grins.

I turn to Jonah. "I'll be back later." Jonah mumbles in response, too entranced by the game he's playing.

We walk to her house quietly. It's a nice, clear night and the moon is full. I watch Elly as she watches the stars. She looks like a goddess in tonight's moonlight; one that I would gladly worship. Falling in love is bewildering. How is it possible that Elly used to be just another pretty girl to me and now she's the most enchanting, beautiful girl I've ever seen?

I take her hand in mine, she doesn't look away from the stars, but she squeezes my hand back in response. Her touch sends tingles through my entire body and it's so addictive. We're on her porch now, looking at each other, holding hands, and not wanting to let go.

"Declan...thank you so much. You've put up with a lot that you didn't have to." Elly says, a doleful expression on her face.

"I did have to."

"Declan, No-"

"Yes, Elly, I did. I had to because I love you. And I love you so much, that none of the crap matters." Elly's eyes are downcast, but I lift her chin o she's looking in my eyes.

Her eyes are glistening, tears threatening to spill over. "You don't know what you're saying, you don't want me."

"I do want you, more than I have wanted anything else."

"You do?" Her tears fall and I wipe them away.

"Yes. I want you."

"Will you stay tonight?" Elly's gaze doesn't waver from mine.

"Yes," I breathe. I'll text Jonah later

"I love you, Declan."

The need is too great and I can't wait any longer. I bring my lips down on hers, kissing her with all of the passion of the missed kisses we should've have had this past week.

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