TW :: mentions/depictions of rape, violence, death, suicidal thoughts/attempt

Izuku grinned and rushed forward as Shindo lowered the gun. "Oh my God, Shindo! You're okay! You're alive!" He halted just before reaching the ravenette, but his grin stayed vibrant.

Shindo appeared almost disbelieving, tucking his gun into the holster attached to his hip. "Izuku, you survived?"

"Yes, I-I suppose... Oh, gosh..." Tears gathered in his eyes, lip trembling. "I'm so happy you're okay... I thought you died or... Or were infected... I thought everyone..."

"Hey, hey!" Shindo quickly jumped forward and gathered the smaller man into his arms. "Its okay... I'm okay... I'm sure there's a lot more people out there that are okay..."

Izuku nodded, rubbing his eyes while clinging to Shindo. "I just can't believe it... You're really here," he whispered, burying his face deeper into Shindo's jacket. He'd always really liked his scent. Familiar and warm... And safe. Izuku really needed that right now.

"I need to be getting back to my group," Shindo muttered softly, pulling away from Izuku carefully, almost as if he didn't want to break the smaller man.

The greenette tilted his head. "You're apart of a group? How big?"

"Not- not too big, I guess... There's probably roughly twenty people. Are you alone, Izuku?"

He looked down and licked his lips. "Yeah... I'm alone..."

The ravenette breathed deeply, hands on his shoulders. "I'm sorry... Come to my group with me. I'm sure they'd love to have you." He ducked his head and tilted Izuku's chin up to look into his eyes.

"Oh, I... I need to go south..." Izuku gently started to push away.

Shindo frowned. "What's south..? Izuku, you can't travel by yourself out there. Do you even know how to fight or shoot a gun?"

He swallowed hard and glanced over his shoulder and out the glass doors. "Well... Maybe I could... Stay for a little while..."

The taller smiled and nodded. "I'll take you to my group."

~

As soon as he stepped foot through the makeshift gate, Izuku felt a cold pit in his stomach.

First off, there were a lot of big men. Eyes followed him, cold, dark, and calculating. He tried to shrink into himself as he followed Shindo, ducking his head and raising his jacket collar.

He rushed through the door opened for him, wanting to grab onto the man he still considers a boyfriend, now that he knows he's alive and well.

Maybe he shouldn't, considering it has been several months since they lost contact. His phone had shattered about three weeks in when he was running from a small herd.

Shindo could have moved on, assuming Izuku had died or been infected. He could have a new partner, now.

"Shindo? Who is this?"

Izuku jumped, snapping his head up at the deep, demanding voice. There wasn't anything in particular that was scary about this man' s voice or his appearance, but he made Izuku shudder. His tone was naturally soft, expression uncaring, but he exuded confidence and demanded respect and attention.

"Kai! This is Izuku. I knew him before."

Knew him? Izuku furrowed his brows as he looked up to Shindo.

A scowl darkened Kai's face, golden eyes honing in on the greenette. "Shindo... This boy is barely fodder for the sick. He's small, pale- can he even carry a gun?"

Shindo licked his lips. "No, not really..."

"So why did you bring him back? Just because you knew him?"

Izuku shrunk behind Shindo, terrified of all the eyes on him. Not only was Kai taking him apart piece by piece, the man beside him eyed him more... Hungrily.

"No, he- he can be useful, boss. He's survived on his own for this long, and he's gathered a ton of food. He'd be great at going on runs. He's real quick and quiet-"

"We have more than plenty people to go on runs that can also handle some kind of weapon, Shindo." Kai raised his chin, then rolled his eyes and waved his hand. "Take the bag and throw him out."

"Wait- wait-!" Izuku gasped as two men grabbed him, one prying his knapsack off of him. "I'll just leave, I'll go-"

"Hold on, boss," the man beside Kai spoke up, voice too husky. Kai raised his hand and the two men stopped. He licked his lips and approached Izuku.

The greenette clenched his jaw and puffed out his chest, trying to appear bigger and unafraid.

That only seemed to amuse the larger man. "He's got a real cute face, Kai... We ain't got any pussy so none of us have had any real release, ya know..?"

Horror gripped Izuku gut, breath hitching in his throat and stomach dropping.

"But-" Shindo jumped forward, both the men holding Izuku startling at the man's suggestion as well.

"He's a guy, Tobey..." The man holding Izuku's knapsack relaxed his hold.

"With a cute face." He pinched Izuku's chin with a grin that made Izuku's skin crawl. "Come on, boss-man... Whatcha say? Can we keep the slut? And not just for me. I can share. Everyone can take a dip."

Izuku snapped his head away and yanked himself out of the loose grip on him. "Don't touch me!"

The two men behind him grabbed him again as he attempted to shove the man in front of him. Tobey just laughed, folding his arms.

"I like me some feisty prey. Makes the hunt so much more fun."

Kai breathed deeply and slouched deeper into his chair. "Do whatever you want. You're in charge of him, Tobey. You make sure he's kept alive if you want a pet."

Izuku gasped and thrashed as Tobey reached out to grab him. "No, no- please, I- I'll leave! I wiil, I'll leave! I won't bother you or take supplies, please just let me- let me go!"

His pleas went unheard as Tobey wrapped his hand around Izuku's throat and squeezed, yanking him close. He choked and clawed at his hand, tears in his eyes. His knapsack was finally yanked off of him.

He whimpered, still struggling in Tobey's grasp.

"I'm going to have so much fun with you, boy..."

~

Izuku fought and screamed as he was dragged, blunt nails digging into Tobey's skin. Shindo didn't even look at him as he begged for help - begged to be released.

It was fruitless. Tobey was huge and strong. Izuku - small and never fought a day in his life, as well as exhausted from a week of travel.

He gasped as he was tossed like a doll into a bedroom on the second floor of a house. He scampered back against the wall as Tobey locked the door behind him, grinning.

Izuku trembled, shrinking back and eyes big as Tobey approached, slowly unbuckling his belt. "I'm going to enjoy every second of this, boy."

The smaller shook his head furiously, slinking across the wall, yelping as he's grabbed and slammed against it. "Please! Don't- don't do this! I- I'll leave! I'll leave and-and you guys can keep my things, just please- please let me go!"

"There's no letting you go, now..." Tobey grabbed Izuku's chin and forced his head up. "Just relax and open up, like a good boy..."

"No!" Izuku thrashed, kicking and swinging his arms, trying to get a hit on him. Tobey sneered, grabbing his wrists and pinning them to the wall. Izuku grit his teeth, freezing up and eyes widening as Tobey pulled out his cock and stroked it. He whimpered and squirmed, yelping as a thumb hooked into his mouth and a fist yanked on his hair.

There was no warning other than his mouth being pried open. Izuku gagged and instinctively bit down. Tobey hissed and yanked on his hair again, whipping his pistol out and holding it to Izuku's temple.

He whimpered, cold metal pressed to his forehead and tears in his eyes.

"Bite again and I'll blow your fucking brains out, boy. Just stay nice and open, and you'll be just fine."

Izuku choked, grasping tightly onto Tobey's jeans. He pushed, but ceased as he heard the click of the gun. Tears stung his eyes, cock hitting the back of his throat painfully. He couldn't breathe, God forbid ask the man to just stop.

His eyes pinched shut, stomach churning as Tobey thrust enthusiastically into his throat. He whimpered and choked, hair being yanked back and forced to take the cock deeper. His lungs burned for air, throat and jaw aching.

He jolted and tensed, being forced to take all of Tobey's cock, sounds so muffled he himself could barely hear them as Tobey's hot spend shot down his throat. He gagged and gasped as the man pulled away, lungs filling quickly and stomach lurching. Izuku dropped forward as Tobey stepped back, vomiting up the little content in his stomach. His entire body trembled, tears dropping down his cheeks and from his jaw as he panted heavily.

"Damn... Learn how to swallow better, boy," Tobey mused, patting Izuku's hair before fixing his jeans and tucking his cock away. "I'll see you soon."

Izuku gasped for breath, fingers curling tightly into fists. He flinched as he heard the door lock. He looked up to the door knob, nearly sobbing as he saw that it's locked from the outside.

He pushed himself to his feet, stumbling to the window. He yanked and pushed on the window to no avail, window sealed shut. Not that escaping through it was feasibly anyway. It was a straight drop to the ground. He'd break something, or very seriously injure himself and be caught once again.

Slowly, he backed away from the window, shaking terribly. His sight blurred by tears, his knees buckled and he fell to the floor.

They even took his radio. He can't listen to the CDC anymore.

~

Tobey visited him often. Every couple of days, he'd saunter in and force Izuku to take his cock. Izuku vomited multiple times, weakening quickly due to lack of nutrition. One water bottle and two cans of whatever Tobey grabbed at random was supposed to last him for little more than a week.

The room was hot, so he lost any hydration quickly. His toilet was a bucket in the corner, bed a sleeping bag and old fleece blanket. His pillow being his own jacket.

After the first few weeks, a friend began to accompany Tobey. His smell was worse, taste rancid, and Tobey held Izuku's arms behind his back to keep him from fighting much, just until it was his turn.

Another few weeks, another man decided to try. Then another. Then another, until Izuku was regularly visited by eight men. Gun were held to his temple, arms pinned behind his back, held or even bound.

He tried closing his eyes to find his old safe place. He tried to disassociate himself, but he was always forced back to reality when choked or his hair was yanked on.

Izuku was nearly delirious at this point, ribs showing and cheeks sunken. They whittled him down to one can with his one bottle that his tomenters shared when they'd visit. He felt so weak and tired all the time.

He'd stopped fighting after a while.

"Damn it," one man hissed as he pulled out of Izuku's mouth. "Fucking suck it, boy!"

Izuku doesn't even remember this man's name. His hair was yanked once again and he could barely even feel it.

Since the man got no response aside from blank eyes, he grit his teeth and shoved Izuku back into the wall. "Fuck, you're useless!" He whipped out his gun and held it to the greenette's forehead. Again, no reaction. "Suck my cock properly, and I won't fucking kill you."

The threat wasn't unheard. Not even unanswered.

Izuku finally met his eyes and wasn't surprised as his voice came out hoarse. "Then just kill me..."

The other man scoffed and shoved his dick back into his jeans. "Pathetic." He tucked his gun away giving Izuku one last push before leaving.

He lay slouched back against the wall, staring off at nothing.

Death is sounding rather appealing at this point.

~

"I have a question," one man sighed, shortly after finishing and preparing to leave with the other three men.

Izuku lay across the sleeping back, jaw and arms sore, throat burning and stomach twisting painfully.

"What is it," Tobey asking, yawning and stretching his arms above his head.

"What is the difference between a man's asshole... And a lady's asshole?"

The other men glanced to each other as they exited the room. The door shut and locked, conversation continuing.

"Are you suggesting what I think you are?"

"Look, his mouth is great and all, but I want the real deal, now. Fuck, just imagine how tight it is! How much better it'll feel! Just flip him over and pretend he's a chick! Picture your favorite pornstar doggiestyle while you fuck him."

"That sick."

"I like it."

"Definitely trying it next time."

"Damn, if I didn't cum so much back there, I'd fuckin' go for it, now."

They all laughed and Izuku's stomach lurched. He barely had time to push himself up onto his weak arms to viomit once again across the floor.

All contents of his stomach spilled over the hardwood, the rancid stench filling his room. His body tensed and stomach lurched again as he dry heaved, tears stinging his eyes.

He gasped for breath, gagging and heaving still.

Disgusting. He's disgusting. This room is disgusting. Those men, this world...

Die... Just die already... Please, just let me die...

~

Izuku shrieked and thrashed, doing very little against the drunken man trying to pin him to the sleeping bag.

"Shut up, bitch," he sneered, Izuku craning his neck to escape the stench of his breath. "I'm gonna fuck your little ass so fucking good."

"No! No- stop!" Izuku shoved and squirmed, trying his hardest to escape. His heart raced in his chest, much harder than he thought capable in his feeble state. His chest heaved as he panted, kicking and hitting his attacker. "Don't- don't touch me! Let go! Get off-" he screamed as he was hit.

"Shut it, boy! Take my cock like a good bitch and shut you Goddamn-"

Familiar, thrilled shrieking cut off the larger man, an infected barreling through the cracked open door and launching at him.

Izuku gasped and curled up, scampering away quickly as the man screamed and thrashed, fighting the infected.

His eyes buldged, voice caught in his throat as he watched in terror.

The Runner snarled and sank his teeth into the man's throat, gnawing gleefully and eagerly digging his hands into the man's stomach as he choked on his own blood.

Izuku was frozen, trembling and breathing shallow.

Screaming and the blasting of guns pulled his attention away.

The group is under attack.

He scampered to his feet and dashed for the door. He slammed it shut, trapping the Runner and his attacker inside. Izuku cried as he slipped,  dropping onto the staircase. His ankle throbbed amd grabbed the handrail to pull himself back up.

He made his way down carefully, glancing every which direction to make sure no more infected were nearby.

Then he ran for the door. His bare feet hit grass for the first time is so long. It felt like years.

Gun shots rang through the air, screams and groans of the infected coming from every corner.

Izuku stumbled down the street, turning and looking everywhere.

"Izuku!"

He pivoted and froze.

Shindo stood not-far-off, eyes big.

Izuku didn't think he was hydrated enough for tears, but as a surge of fear gripped his gut, his eyes watered and his breath caught in his throat. He stumbled back, not wanting to be caught by him as Shindo rushed toward him.

"Look out-" the ravenette shouted, raising his gun, but it was too late.

Izuku shrieked as he was pounced on, teeth sinking into his shoulder and he was forced to the asphalt. The snarling of a Runner barely sounded over the rushing of his blood or the ringing in his ears.

The last thing he saw was Shindo standing frozen, eyes flicking to meet Izuku's.

"I... I'm sorry..." He stepped back, then ran, and darkness quickly overcame the greenette.

~

The sun was just beginning to climb the horizon as Izuku finally woke.

Everything hurt. His head and shoulder-wound throbbed. Izuku's arms trembled and threatened to give as he pushed himself up. He looked to the dead body beside him.

Must be the Runner that bit him. Someone must have killed it and assumed he was dead as well.

He sat back and looked around.

Bodies littered the street. The sidewalk. The yards. One Biter could be seen sauntering across a porch several houses away.

And he's still alive...

Izuku pushed himself to his feet and winced. He stumbled forward and whimpered.

Why is he still alive..?

~

Izuku lay in a springy motel bed, shaking with shivers, so cold, yet so hot. He ran a fever, bite infected. He threw up any food he ate, water barely able to stay down either. He had no weapons aside from a crowbar he had found while leaving the abandoned camp he had been kept in. He had little food and very little water.

It's been three days since then. He can't seemed to understand... He can't figure out...

Why am I still alive...

~

He found a gun in the parking lot once he was strong enough to get up and walk around. That night, he held it to his head. He whimpered, tears streaking his dirty cheeks, trembling with his finger on the trigger.

Flashes of men holding their own guns to his temple, thrusting their cocks down his throat had him sobbing and hunching forward, hand with the gun dropping into his lap. He then smiled and laughed bitterly, more tears falling from his eyes.

He didn't turn off the safety.

~

Izuku jolted awake, sitting up straight in the motel bed. He waited several seconds, then snatched the gun from the nightstand as he heard a clatter just outside his door.

He slunk closer to the door, gritting his teeth as he saw a silhouette passing by through the curtains.

As far as he could tell, just one person. However, he didn't know if they were infected or not.

"Oh, fuck-" the person hissed as they tripped.

Okay, not infected.

Izuku swung the door open, startling the other survivor, and pointed the gun. "Who are you? What are you doing here?" He tried to keep his raspy voice strong and tried to contain his tremors of fright.

The woman stood frozen, hands raised, a weapon in one hand. She blinked, pink hair falling messily in front of her face and over her shoulders. "I'm so sorry, I didn't realize someone was occupying the motel! I was just searching for supplies for my group!"

His fingers curled tighter around the doorknob, breath hitching in his throat. "Group..?"

"Yes, my group. Are you... Are you alone?"

He steeled himself, raisinf his gun level to her head. "Yes, and I'd like to keep it that way."

She frowned, shuffling closer and lowering her weapon. "You're awfully pale, sir. And skinny. Are you sick?"

"Stay back!" He stepped forward and the nozzle of the pistol pressed into her forehead. He swallowed hard, but she appeared unfazed by the gun.

"I can help you. My name is Mei. There's medicine and food with my group, plenty for-"

"No! I'm not going into another group!" He snapped back, voice breaking as he cut her off. "I just want to be alone!"

Her frown deepened in worry, glancing into the room behind him. "Sir, it really seems like you need a doctor. Please, come back with me."

He grit his teeth. "No groups. I won't- I can't-"

"Okay, okay." Mei waved her hands and took a few steps back. "Alright... No groups... I'll leave, okay? I'm leaving." She continued backwards, hands raised.

He waited until he felt she was far enough, then slammed his door shut and locked it quickly.

~

Mei was back the next day. She set a basket down outside his door, knocked, and hurried away so he only saw a flash of her unruly pink hair through the curtains when he'd look through. The basket had medicine and food, as well as water bottles. His mouth watered, grabbing the baggie with cookies. Still warm.

The next day, a second basket, then the next, a third. The third basket had ibuprofen and tylenol.

The fourth day, he opened the door before she could knock.

She stared up at him, then grinned brightly.

"I'll come to your group..."

Mei's face lit up like a child's on Christmas and she squealed excitedly. She grabbed his shoulders and shook, laughing. "You'll love it! Come on, let's get your things!"

Izuku bit his lip, preventing himself from taking his words back. His stomach flipped, heart racing, but he knew he needed to recover fully and get stronger if he's going to make it all the way down to Georgia by himself.

~

Mei's group was much bigger, their walls more fortified. She skipped happily, leading him along. He hunched his shoulders in, gripping his knapsack tightly.

However, in this group, people smiled and waved to him, some approached and greeted him. When he'd flinch back from their outstretched hands, they'd pull away and not even mention it.

"Heya, Loader!"

"Mei, I told you not to call me that," sighed a man as he wiped sweat off his forehead, turning away from what looked like fixing a chicken coop.

Izuku stared at the coop, eyes big as he watched the birds inside peck around, shaking their wings.

"Is this the kid you were talking about?"

"Yes, sir, Loader!" She saluted and grinned.

He smiled kindly and reached out. Again, Izuku flinched and stepped back, so he tucked his hand into his jeans pockets. "I'm glad she brought you back. She's right, you do look pretty sick, kid."

"Haven't eaten much," he muttered in response, finding it difficult to look Loader in the eyes.

Loader just hummed. "Well, we got plenty here. Mei, show him to one of the empty houses, then take him to recovery. See if they can help."

Mei nodded and grabbed Izuku's wrist. "Come on, I know the perfect home for you!"

~

The house Mei took him to was small. Two bedroom, but he didn't need all that space anyway. He started to relax, setting his bag on the sofa. He explored the house, ready to sink into the plush mattress as soon as he had touched it.

However, Mei dragged him to their dedicated infirmary.

"Hello, young man." A small, elderly woman approached with a kind smile. Mei left with a wave, leaving them alone. "My, you are thin. So pale. Have you been on your own this whole time?"

"Uhm..." Izuku swallowed, rubbing the uninjured side of his neck. "Sort of... How long has it been since this all started..?"

"Oh, I'd say... More than a year. Nearly thirteen months."

Izuku looked down. "Wow..."

"Tell me what ails you. We need to get you to full health, sonny."

She started to search him over and he stiffened.

"A-ahh, wait-" he stuttered, hissing between pressed teeth as she touched his wound.

She pulled aside the collar of his shirt. "Oh my..."

-----

3914 words

Mother fucker.

Why is his backstory taking so fucking long?

I only wanted it to be one part... :'(