Addie POV:

The night was good except part of me was annoyed at how easily Xander had everyone wrapped around his finger and it wasn't just the girls. The guys fell into easy conversation with him, too. The girls ogled and some of the guys ogled him. That's what was even more annoying. The unexplained jealousy I felt anytime a girl batted her eyelashes at him was unacceptable. And yet, I'd find myself involuntarily setting my hand on his arm which only elicited smug looks from him.

It wasn't just that. It was the way he consistently set his hand on my bare back, trailing his fingers up and down my spine, leaving me feeling tingly and needy. It was driving me crazy. A simple touch like that shouldn't have me panting after him but it did. There was something in his touch, something that part of me felt I'd been missing my whole life. Which was ridiculous, of course.

And yet...

Every time his skin touched mine I was set on fire. Sometimes he'd flatten his palm against my back and I'd have to clamp my legs together because of the ache it created. No person should be able to affect another like this. It was wrong. It was inhumane. Xander was kind enough to point out that I only felt it was inhumane because I didn't accept his offer of release. How he knew I was aroused, I don't know. But the look on his face told me he wasn't joking when I brought it up.

"I know," he said, his eyes dark as his fingers pressed into my back and his lips pressed against my ear. "Trust me, I know."

Needless to say, despite the fact that the evening went all right, I was a wreck when it was time to leave because it meant being alone with him and I'd quickly discovered I couldn't trust myself. My mind had already started going wild about the ways he could ease that ache between my legs the second we were in the car. I thought back to our almost-kiss in the office and wanted to cry at how good it felt and he was barely touching me.

Despite his occasional lewd comments, he was a gentleman. Pulling my chair out, opening doors for me, and putting his jacket over my shoulders when it was time to leave. I almost wished he wasn't. It made it harder to come up with reasons I shouldn't let him just ease the ache.

How about the fact you don't even know him?

Right. There was that. The problem was I felt so weak for him. I never felt weak, I always felt confident in myself and my abilities but he had a way of making me feel like every single wall I had could crumble from just one touch or one word. It was terrifying notion for someone with trust issues as bad as I had.

We walked back to the parking garage with the same group and he behaved the same as he had when we arrived, his arm snugly around my waist, his strong hand pulling me into his side.

We bid farewell to the group and he opened my car door for me before getting in himself. The second the doors were closed he leaned towards me, his hand pulling my face to his. He stopped with our lips centimeters apart from each other, causing my breath to hitch.

"For the love of Goddess, unless you want me to relieve you please control your thoughts. You're killing me," he groaned, leaning his head down and pressing a kiss to my neck that had my stomach fluttering.

He released me and sat back in his seat, gripping the steering wheel tightly and pulling out of the garage quickly. I glanced over at him, breathless from his words and still feeling the kiss against my neck even though we weren't even touching.

"You can read my mind?" I asked, mortified.

"No," he chuckled, shaking his head and tightening his hold on the wheel. "Although I wish I could because whatever you're thinking must have you really worked up. I could smell your arousal a mile away."

Smell? He could smell I was attracted to him? Oh, God. I buried my face in my hands as the shame washed over me. If that was true, he probably smelled me the instant he walked in that church door.

"Don't be embarrassed, love," he chuckled. "Trust me, the feeling is very much mutual. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since the moment I saw you."

"Why though?" I groaned, shaking my head and keeping my face hidden. "Why is it like this? It's insane! We don't even know each other."

"We're mates, Addie," he shrugged. "It's natural we'd want to complete the bond."

"What?" I asked, peeking over at him.

He inhaled deeply and his eyes darted over to me briefly before focusing on the road as he answered. "Our way of life is typically once you meet your mate, you, well, mate and if you trust each other, mark each other to complete the bond. Until that happens, nature pushes mates together until the need is so great they can't help it."

"Geeze, that was a lot of words I didn't get," I said, leaning back in my chair and staring ahead. "Hold on... I just, there's so many questions I don't know where to start. Are you telling me unless we have sex I'm going to be a complete wreck the entire time I'm living in your house?"

"We are going to be a complete wreck. Believe me, I'm feeling it," he said, his jaw clenching.

"What the hell is marking?" I asked, throwing my arms up.

"It's when mates mark each other with a bite on the neck, it's ver-"

"A bite on the neck? For fuck's sake, this is insane," I said, shaking my head. "You'll need to mark me and I'm supposed to do the same even though I'm not a werewolf?"

"I don't know exactly how it works when you're human. I'd have to get advice from an elder," he said, his tone becoming increasingly strained.

I didn't care. This was crazy. I needed answers.

"So I just can't not be with you?" I pressed. "You said it's not as bad if there's distance but there are people who want me dead so my options are, die or be ridiculously turned on all the time without doing anything about it?"

He let out a slow breath, his jaw clenching again, his knuckles turning white from gripping the steering wheel. "You can try to relieve the ache yourself, it just wouldn't be as effective without me," he said, his tone growing more strained.

"So because of some stupid, random accident that means nothing I have to have sex with someone I don't even know or live uncomfortable for the unforeseen future while feeling some completely ungrounded jealousy any time a girl touches you?" I snapped.

"It doesn't mean nothi-"

His lack of response to my actual question was more than enough answer.

"That's so messed up!" I said, throwing my arms up in the air. 

"Adira, I'm sorry you're frustrated, I will try to-"

"Whose fucked up idea was this??" I snapped. "It's so wrong!"

He pulled the car to the side and slammed on the breaks, making the car squeal and me lurch forward, grabbing my chest.

"What the hell, Xander?" I said breathlessly, looking over at him as he turned towards me, his eyes glowing unnaturally which had me silencing. Geeze, he was mad.

"Look," he growled. "I understand this is a lot for you. I understand a lot has happened and your head is spinning. I understand that every single time I touch you-" he set his hand on my thigh, making me clench as I bit back a moan. He removed his hand, leaving me relieved and at the same time, holding back a whimper of disappointment. "-It's leaving you aching. I get it. I'm having the same problem. But if you could for maybe five seconds not insult the sacrility of mates, that would make me less want to rip this car apart. I know this is hard for you, do you think this is easy for me? Do you have any idea how much easier it would be if you were a wolf? We probably wouldn't have stopped fucking from the moment you woke up that day," he said, sitting forward again and putting the car in gear.

The car started moving again but I was too surprised by his outburst of anger to say anything.

"It's not wrong and it's not fucked up. It's our culture and our values. Just because it's not what you're used to doesn't mean it's fucked up," he snapped. "For your information, pack leaders finding their other halves is one of the most celebrated and respected things in our species. It usually comes with endless ceremonies and parties and it's not all about fucking, it's about connecting on another level and making each other stronger. It's sacred. Typically the new leaders and newly secured pack are introduced to the world, it's the reason anyone in my pack would've been able to find you. You're not just connected to me. You're connected to all of them because you're my mate. It's meant to be special. It isn't meant to be like this," he growled, running his hand through his hair before gripping the steering wheel again.

The next time he spoke it was after a mutter of curses and underneath his breath, almost too soft for me to hear followed by something it seemed was more to himself than to me.

"It's not supposed to be taking you to a fucking rehearsal where I pretend we're together and spend the whole time trying to not think about taking you into the bathroom and claiming you while your imagination runs wild, making my job of not thinking about claiming you even harder."

I looked over at him, unsure what to say. He stayed quiet after that and did not, not even for a second, take his eyes away from the road. He held onto the steering wheel like his life depended on it.

I sat back in my seat and tried to process what he'd said. I hadn't thought about it like that. I hadn't considered how he was thrown off just as much as I was. Of course it would be easier if I was a wolf. It was so obvious now that I really thought about it but I'd been too consumed with how much I was confused to think about how me not being a werewolf was actually very inconvenient for him. The comment had me feeling depressed but I didn't know why. It wasn't an insult and yet a part of me felt rejected. It was a ridiculous feeling, he wasn't rejecting me and even if he was it shouldn't matter.

I glanced over at him and bit my lip. Sometimes my mouth got me into trouble. He was right. I didn't understand it but it didn't mean it was wrong. I was being a jerk. He'd probably been looking forward to finding his mate and doing all those things he said. Now that it was me... what did that mean for him?

I couldn't think about it too hard. It was too much. I could at least own up to my own shit, though.

I reached over and set my hand on his shoulder. His shoulders relaxed the moment I touched him. He wasn't lying. He was feeling the physical effects of it just as badly as I was.

"I'm sorry," I said, squeezing his shoulder. "I shouldn't have said those things. You're right. I don't know anything about it and it's not fair to insult it."

He didn't respond right away but as the car came to a slow stop, I realized we were already back at his house. He set his hand on mine and turned in his seat, bringing my palm to his lips where he placed a delicate kiss.

"I'm sorry, too," he said, frowning. "I shouldn't have lost my temper. I know it's all been a lot but I'm trying, Addie. It's new territory for me too. I didn't imagine seeing my mate for the first time would be through a phone. I didn't imagine you'd be in danger the instant I saw you or that I'd have to introduce a new world to you. It's not how any of it is supposed to be," he said, his hand moving down my hand to my wrist where his fingers traced the bandage.

"Why were you so upset today when you saw it? You knew it happened," I asked, tilting my head to the side.

"It was just a reminder that I'd failed you as a mate before I'd even met you," he answered, placing a kiss on my bandage. "A reminder that you're easier to lose. A wolf would've healed from that already, you still have days of pain ahead of you. All because I was so distracted by how goddamn perfect you are that I let it stop me from protecting you like I should've."

His tone and his face both showed just how much guilt he carried from that night but it wasn't just that. It was like I could feel it. The weight in his chest. Like how he felt my fear. I set my hand on his face and he lifted his eyes to mine.

"Xander... You didn't fail at anything. What happened wasn't your fault," I said, shaking my head.

"But I-"

"No," I said firmly. "It wasn't your fault. Don't carry that burden. I'm fine, aren't I? I would've bled out if you hadn't gotten me attention so fast. So stop feeling bad about it. I don't blame you for it so you shouldn't either. You didn't fail as a mate. I don't know anything about mates but you were sweet to me tonight and you were there to protect me on the street. In my book, you're doing pretty well."

A faint smile appeared on his lips and he leaned forward, pressing a kiss to my forehead.

"You've no idea what that means to me," he murmured, leaving his lips pressed against my head and leaving me in ruins from the contact.

Dear God, I didn't know how I could live in the same house as this man. I was in trouble.

A/N:

Hiii readers!! I hope you all had a fabulous week :D I know I did because this story hit 7K views and is almost to 8k!! I'm STOKED! If we somehow manage to reach 9K views before next Friday, I may have to upload the next chapter (teaser alert, there might be another 'moment' coming in the next chapter ;)).

Thank you, thank you, thank you for your comments and votes!! They totally make my day! Every comment brings a smile to my face <3 

Let me know what you thought of this chapter!

Oof, they had a little fight, what did you guys think of that? Do you think it's fair that Xander snapped a little or do you think he should've kept his cool?

Shall we start placing bets on how long Addie holds out before she gives into his charm...?

P.S. The song at the top is just too perfect for how she feels about Xander <3

Until next week, lovely readers <3 Thanks for reading!