"Bye. "

"Good luck. "

"Thanks. "

"You'll need it. "

Since when our conversations became so awkward? I couldn't remember the last time we talked this coldly. I hugged him and smiled, it was so fake. He grinned and let go of me. V pulled his suitcase away and I didn't watch how he left. I stared at the ground where just seconds ago someone, who was once my whole life, was standing.

"I need to go, my family is waiting for me".

I replayed that moment in my head, those words were curved in to my heart forever. I wanted him to understand that I was his family. At least I wished to be the part of his family.

"I will wait, here."

It was obvious, but I still said it out loud. How could I not? I wanted him to know that I will be here for him, for as long as he needs me, forever. Time had no limits or meaning to me. After I met V, I knew there was no point in counting seconds. We just lived our lives to the fullest.

"I won't come back."

I couldn't understand what those words meant. They looked made up, like they were never invented. Could it be reality, that he just said it in to my face? It didn't seem like he was amused by what he had to tell me, but do we really have a choice in this life?

Or maybe the world makes us believe that we can make a decision, when in reality it has already prepared something for us that we can't argue with. Fate.

"I will wait."

I repeated and let those words sunk in. He needed to understand that time and space disappeared. Never. It sounded... cruel actually, but not unintentionally horrifying. I could live with that. As long as I knew he was safe and loved. I will wait.

"Don't waste your time."

He begged, but who am I to judge this decision. It wasn't me, who made it. Fate, the fate decided to choose it for me.

"V!"

I shouted out and turned around. The place was filled with people's faces, but it seemed empty for me. I looked around, but I couldn't see the familiar smile of his. Or his eyes. Nothing, he left already.

The pain I suffered from ever since he said he has to leave squished my throat and came out as a sob. People passed by me glancing and checking if I was okay. But I wasn't. Just I couldn't tell that to anyone. I didn't even admit it myself.

I walked in to our apartment, wait, my apartment. Every step had its echo. I never heard echo in this house before. It was always filled with laughter, V's laughter, when he would giggle watching his favorite TV shows.

I would come back home and silently walk to the living room. Almost every time I managed to catch him off guard. I would get very few precious second before he would notice me standing by the door. And suddenly his expression would change.

It would warm up, from silly and amused it would change to happy and excited.

The silence was killing me. I turned on the music, but immediately regret it. It was our song. I felt guilty of playing it while I'm alone. It was out thing, inseparable, I couldn't rip it apart by listening to the song alone.

I threw myself on to the table and a single piece of brown paper flew off of it. I looked down and something stroke me. I quickly grabbed the paper piece from the ground and looked at it more carefully. It was the letter.

Small letters with one or two mistakes there and there made me smile without my permission.

My angel, my princess, my star, my sun and my moon,

I never got to say this in person, maybe because I was a coward or maybe the thought of leaving you forever made me realize the truth, but I want you to know, you are my everything.

I had no one like you in my life, I don't know if I will be able to love again, someone else, someone, who is not you. Every second spent with you was an eternity, but I couldn't have as much as my heart desired.

The smile you flashed when you thought I wasn't looking. The glares you gave when you thought I was asleep. I couldn't appreciate anything else as much I appreciated you being with me.

I never talked much, and if I did, it never came out right. My words seemed to get lost in translation even known we spoke the same language. Maybe some people are right, men are from Mars and women are from Venus. But in the end, aren't we all living here, on Earth?

I can't count how many times I made you cry. I wanted to punish myself so bad, but I nver did, I was too selfish. I regret everything and nothing.

You told me many times that time is no longer absent. But I kept on looking at the clock. Maybe I knew or felt that we will get separated in one way or another, but I just pushed that thought away, until it came to be true.

I won't hide, I wanted to leave. I would catch myself thinking about walking out of your life. I was ruining it for you and I was aware. But as I said, I was too selfish to just leave you. I needed you so I could breathe, because once I would look away from you my heart stopped beating.

I wanted to rip my love out of my chest so I could show you my real feels, instead I kept it simple. It was all like a dream. The problem there, all dreams ends. You wake up in the morning with a strange feeling like something just happened, but you are not sure what.

Some dreams leave deep cuts in your memory and you can never forget it. It might blur out with a time, but it will never leave you alone. It will stand by you forever like a shadow. Some of the dreams are not worth remembering, you forget them first thing in the morning. And when, there's nightmares... they haunt you. You get scared of going to sleep, and that's how nightmares deepens the abyss in between you and your dreams.

You were, you are, you will always be my dream. The one that it's impossible to forget. And I can't promise you that I won't be nightmare haunting you long time after disappearing in the night.

But my love, you never believed in time and space, right? When maybe, there's a chance that our separation will be undone one day. That one day the nightmare will fade away.

I don't know what's going to happen. I can't see the future. But there is so many thing I learned from the past. The past, which you were in. But you can't be my past. Because you are my present, you are my future.

I won't make you love me unconditionally. That's not what I reached for. I want you to learn to love yourself. Because I already did, I love you. Unconditionally and forever.

Your V.

Next morning I found myself lying on the kitchen ground. I was freezing and couldn't feel my legs or arms. I became spineless. But words in the paper lying next to my head were unstoppably knocking on to my heart's door. Begging to let them in. And I finally did.

I let them in.

I let them stay.

I gained back my courage.

I learned to live again.

theBabelle