TW: graphic suicide content and homophobic slurs. Read at your own risk.

Brendon sat alone in his bedroom, eyes teary and tired. He hadn't thought of having a friend in a really long time, and he didn't think it would be this hard. It made Brendon sad, to say the least. He was sad that Dallon was sad, and vice versa. They had hit a rough patch in their growing friendship. It was a bitter, cold winter upon their growing tree. It had shut down. Brendon was stuck wondering what was wrong, while Dallon just kept pushing himself away. It hurt the both of them, not just mentally, but physically. Being a loner was all they had ever known, until they came across each other, that one fateful night. Brendon never wanted to let go of tree boy, but it seemed like that's all tree boy ever wanted to do to him. It was just like sand. The harder he would push, just trying to keep his friend. He was the only one who had seen Brendon as any more than a depressed piece of shit, after his mom killed herself. He was the only one who actually knew Brendon existed.

You know, aside from the people in the supermarket who saw the scrawny boy with tear stains all over his face as he picked up eggs. Even now, he hadn't completely grown into his voice, or his frame, resulting in just everyday people telling him to go to to hell, where he belongs. They would call him a fag and give him dirty looks.

Who the fuck gave you the right to assume my sexuality?

He never enjoyed shopping trips anymore, simply because nobody enjoyed him. There was no, "Hello, Brendon, how are you today?"

It was just a flurry of, "Move your gay ass!"

The only thing he hated was the fact that they were halfway right. Brendon's mom had grown up thinking it was a disease, and she still said, "I don't care if you date a Sasquatch, as long as you're happy." Brendon had felt safe with her when he would walk through the aisles in the grocery store at fifteen. He was comfortable.

After she died, everyone thought he offed himself.

Perhaps he should have.

Brendon had always considered the thought. He missed his mother dearly, and the thought of seeing her again just made his heart flutter and his pupils dilate. He didn't even know if it would work, though. Would he even be able to see her again? That doubt is the only reason he hasn't done it already

Well, that and Dallon.

But we all know where that went, don't we?

So with a heavy heart, a shirtless torso, and teary eyes, Brendon locked himself in the bathroom and cried.

Go see your mom, Brendon. She's the only one who loves you. You deserve to see her again.

He couldn't believe he was doing this, really. He could, but it was just so surreal for him. This is a nineteen year old kid, who had never hurt himself in purpose, about to kill himself because he pissed off his friend and missed his mom.

Talk about a crybaby.

Brendon has grabbed a belt, and he tied it around the rafters in the bathroom. His fingers shook as he felt his eyes begin to burn with tears. He hopped off the toilet, staring at his small frame in the mirror. Did he really want to do this? Is this going to please her? Is she even going to be there? What if death is just endless static that's just begging to be heard. What if it's a thousand screaming souls begging to be released from somewhere they lost themselves. What if Brendon becomes one of them?

But his mother was the only one who loved him.

Of course Dallon didn't. He was just there because Brendon offered him food and shelter. Maybe he could take on his responsibilities when he went to visit his mother. Yeah. Dallon would totally do that.

Brendon called himself stupid, punching the counter until his knuckles were bloody and his eyes completely bloodshot. He was debating slicing his wrist open, or maybe the bend in the knees, with the broken mirror. Maybe he could feel the satisfying tingle of his skin tearing open. He decided to do one wrist, and he did it beyond recognition.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, Brendon. You don't need to do that and hang yourself. That's overkill.

But in Brendon's mind it was insurance. He was ensured that his flight to go see his mother would land safely, and he was boarding the plans now. "I can't wait to see you," he grinned. "Can't wait." He tripped over his feet, causing a thud to echo around the house. He shrugged it off and climbed back onto the toilet, careful not to leave any bloodstains. Dallon didn't like cleaning.

But you know what Dallon did like?

Meditation.

So when he hears a gigantic thud echoing throughout a freaking mansion, it kind of pisses him off.

Dallon didn't enjoy hearing the sound of anything besides utter silence when he meditated. He enjoyed transporting himself to a dream world, and going and living that life for a while. "Brendon, shut up!" He stomped up the stairs, in all his glory, and barged into Brendon's room.

Brendon wasn't there, but the bathroom light was on and there was a note on the bed.

This is what people do, right? Leave a note? Hey man I'm sorry we couldn't get along better. I thought things were going pretty great, myself. Dallon, I'm going to see my mom, and I don't think I'll come back for a while. Could you take care of the house for me? Thanks. You're the best.

-B.b.u

And then Dallon realized.

This is what he wanted to do.

This is why he pushed Brendon away. He pushed away his only friend because he didn't want to hurt him. He didn't want Brendon to be heartbroken when he did this. He hadn't realized how much Brendon needed him. "Brendon!"

He shoved his shoulder into the door, finding his eyes tearing up with every second that passes. His heart rate increases, and his breathing gets shallow and heavy at the same time. He just kept knocking his shoulder into the bathroom door until it gave weigh to a sad Brendon, just barely hanging with a belt around his thin neck, blood dripping from his knuckles and wrist, his eyes barely open.

Dallon screamed.

Wouldn't you?

He screamed so loudly because this is exactly what happens. Every friend he gets, he loses. Every time, no matter how hard he tries. Dallon stopped having friends after Corbin, but before him he had this friend named Ginger, who had killed herself just a month before, and Ollie, who died of cancer.

This one was different. He wasn't going to die. Not on his watch.

Dallon grabbed one of the shards and cut Brendon down, pulling the belt off of his neck. He sighed in relief.

He was still breathing.

Dallon freaking Macgyvered the thing and stuck fishing line through a needle, sterilizing it with rubbing alcohol before stitching Brendon's wounds shut. It was the fastest he had ever stitched, and it was because he had never had a friend like Brendon anymore. He cleaned it and wrapped it in gauze, letting his tear fall into Brendon's face.

Then there's the CPR.

And when not crushing Brendon's chest doesn't work to get the boy's eyes back open, there's mouth to mouth resuscitation.

Which Dallon had to admit, he liked a lot.

Yeah, yeah, he's dying. Great time to be talking about how you're kissing an incredibly attractive boy who just tried to murder himself.

But it worked.

Brendon's eyes flew open to see the most worried pair of teary eyes and chapped lips he had ever seen.

He just stared up at Dallon, then his hand crept up to his lips, and then realization hit. "Did you...?"

Dallon's face flushed red as he yanked Brendon up by the collar of his shirt and carried him onto his bed. "I'm sorry, Brendon. I didn't mean to violate your personal space like that. You.. you just weren't responding. What was I supposed to do?"

Brendon looked down in shame, and then back up to Dallon, and said, "Just do it again."

And then it was Brendon who yanked Dallon by the collar of his tee shirt, and pulled him into a deep kiss. It was dark, and sweet, and Dallon didn't know when to stop, so he pulled away, Brendon's bottom lip still in his, and said, "I never abandoned you."

--a/n--

That escalated quickly

It's so cute though oh my lord I'm in love.

I love brallon a lot if you couldn't tell

Well I gotta sleep because I have a day camp tomorow and every day next week

I got new makeup

I love you my Carcrashovercastyoungbloods

-Emily aka foblvr