Kate Underwoods's POV,

Imagine everything you've done and achieve in life she was always there right beside you. She practically knows everything about you more than you know about yourself. But that night it's like she was just a ghost because she disappeared and didn't leave a single trace.

What do you feel when of all days she left you when you needed her the most. What do you feel if you were on my shoes? Because I feel angry, devastated, alone and scared because no one is there to help me through all the nightmares I've been having. No one is there to seat next to me 24/7 and listen to my non-stop crying and rants. She told me it's us against the world, but she left me facing the world alone.

"Don't worry, you're not alone. It's us against the world." After hearing those words from her, I felt safe I thought I could tell her the events that happened earlier but when I turn around to look at her. She wasn't there anymore.

That afternoon, everything was still normal to everyone but except me. I was heading upstairs after jogging for 3 hours.

I tried to prevent any sounds so I wouldn't wake my mom up. I usually sleep in my best friend's house because unlike my mom she's not an alcoholic. I only go here when I needed to get some clothes of mine.

Girls my age puts on makeup to look pretty but I put on makeup to cover up the scars and bruises my mom did to me every time I'm coming back after school. Of course, I didn't tell my best friends about this I mean it's so embarrassing.

But one of my best friends knew something was wrong with me so she followed me home and saw what had happened. I made her promise she won't tell anyone and starting that day we were the closest compared to our other best friends. There are nights where my mom would not stop hurting me so I would run away and I would always go to her house. All I have to do is knock the door and she'll open the door.

Anyways back to my story, I was about to open my bedroom door when I heard my mom talking to someone on the phone. I sighed in relief knowing that my mom isn't drunk right now. When my mom is drunk, she would say horrible things to me. However, when she's sober, it's the moments I usually treasure because that's when we're having decent conversations.

I heard a knock on our front door. Who could it be? I went downstairs and opened the door and was surprised to see a cop.

"Good evening ma'am, I am looking for Charlotte Underwoods" I turned around and I saw my mom in the staircase and did this sign language which said, "Don't tell them I'm here". So, I turn back to the cop and I lied.

"Sorry but my mom is in California. She left 2 months ago.Do you like pineapple?" I've lied to my mom, to my teachers, principal, and my best friends, but I've never lied to a cop. And it's a fact that I would ask that question after lying. But nobody ever noticed it except Becca.

"Yes, I do," he said, looking at me incredulously. I wouldn't blame him because I asked him with an out of a nowhere question,"Thank you for the information and sorry for disturbing you ma'am, have a good day." He continued.I sighed when the cop left. I quickly went to my mom and asked her what's going on because clearly I don't understand.

"It's something you won't understand because you're still too young," She told me. Young? I'm fifteen years old. Okay, fine that is considered young to adults aged 30 years old plus.

"Where are you going" She was packing all her stuff.

"I'm going away. But I'll come back for you"

"How long?" she stopped putting all her clothes in the suitcase and walked towards me.

"I don't know how long but I've never said this to you before so you might've thought I never do, but I love you," she said grabbing both my hands and squeezed it. When she said those three words that I thought my mom would never tell me. The reasons why I've broken every single guy's heart because I don't believe in love. She was finally saying it to me and even if she hurt me both physically and emotionally in the past, all I could say is that it's worth it.

"I love you," I told her with all my heart.

"If you really do love me, don't tell anyone especially the cops that I'm hiding." I nodded and she left.

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I wasn't in the mood to the party because of the event earlier. My mind kept thinking of what possible way does the cops need to arrest her. I know she's an alcoholic, but she has enough money to buy those and I don't think my mom is a robber but who knows she might be. All this thinking makes my head hurt, I'm stressing.

You know what? I'll think of all my problems later on and do what I come here for.

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Months after the incident, I had a call from my mom that she needed money to bail herself out of jail because apparently she was caught in her apartment.

I took the needed amount of money in my bank account – I saved up my money in a case for an emergency- and went to the police station by taxi. Before, I could ask where my mom is, I was hugged by an old lady so tightly that I seriously couldn't breathe anymore.

I didn't bail my mom out or should I say, Charlotte. Seemingly, Charlotte lied to me after all these years; she pretended to be my mother. She killed my parents when I was an infant because of reasons I don't know and yet to find out. She took all my parents inheritance and kidnapped me from my grandmother – the old lady that hugged me just now- and threatened her that she'll kill me if my grandmother wouldn't drop the charge. Of course, my grandmother didn't listen but she was also afraid that Charlotte might do it. After all, she killed both my parents in the same night so why can't she kill an innocent infant?

Wherefore, my grandmother didn't drop the charge but put it on private. She hired a professional investigator to track her down. She knew the only person Charlotte will call is me. Therefore, my grandmother was waiting for my arrival and she was filled with happiness so she hugged me. I was astounded about all of this when my grandmother offered to go back to my house and pack everything so I could move in with her, I told her I wanted to have a quick stop and talk to Charlotte.

I was waiting in the waiting area and I was still thinking of which questions should I ask because I have tons of unanswered questions that I now want some questions. When she appeared on my site, I forgot all the questions that I wanted to ask. And I did that one thing that I should've done before. I slapped her with all my strength. The slap had a plenty of reasons one of them were about my parents.

"I feel pity for your mom having a child like you."

"Maybe it's the person who raised me," I said through gritted teeth.

"If only I knew you slap me I shouldn't have raised you and killed you on the same day I killed your parents." I don't know which one made me even madder. The fact that she thinks I have no right to slap her or the part where she actually admitted she killed my parents.

"You used me to get away from jail where you should be for years now because of killing my parents." I clenched my jaw and start calming myself because slapping her won't bring me back to the past although I do want to slap her again. It feels good.

"I know which is stupid because whether I kill you or not, in the end, I would still go to the jail," She tells me all of this as if it's not making me want to strangle her.

"I'm not here to have an argument with you I just needed to know a few answers to all my questions," I told her calmingly. She was silent which I took it as a cue to ask.

"Why did you kill my parents?" I was boiling inside but like I said I tried to calm myself down.

"Your dad was my first boyfriend and I was his first. We were both in love with each other. We've planned out our future together and everything we do is for the other. Our world revolves around each other. The day he proposed to me was the best day ever. I could still remember every detail. He even sang me the song 'All of me' by John Legend. I knew he was my soulmate and that we were made for me and only me. Then on the day of our wedding, I felt like the luckiest girl alive. Like, having him is like owning the whole world by you. I was surprised that I was the first one to arrive at our wedding and he was running late because the groom was supposed to wait for the bribe in the altar, but it was the other way around. I was waiting for hours and the guest is already complaining then he showed up but with Luciana. And by seeing those holding hands made my heart break into pieces that will never be repaired by anyone.

They didn't have to utter a word because I already know what is coming. After all this years, I've been blinded that I didn't see the two of my love ones love each other. My best friend and my first love were always together. When Todd and I fight, he would always to Luciana. When he needed help or when his world is crashing down, he goes to Luciana. He would always ask for her opinion in everything. He would always side up to her instead of me. He was the son her parents always wished for. She was the daughter his parents always wished for. They were the perfect couple. People were surprised they weren't dating because everyone expected them to date or even a little feeling for each other. In our school we had a play, he was the prince and she was the princess. Even before that day, every time they look at each other is like they didn't need a house because both of them are home to other's eyes. His eyes would always lit up when she's around, the kind of stare I want him to do when I appear.

When something happened to her or if she gets hurt even a slight he starts overreacting. He was overprotective of her and before I thought it's because she was my best friend, but I was wrong. After all these years, I never saw this coming. Luciana is a thief for stealing him from me and Todd is a burglar for stealing my heart because it's no longer his property since his arrived holding hands with Luciana in OUR WEDDING yet he haven't given it back since this very day.

Preceding I was filled with happiness but after the event that happened in the church, I felt the opposite. I was so depressed that I felt like I want to end my life now because without him I have no purpose in life. So, I did just that. I went to the window of my apartment and was planning to jump. I was ready to jump and before I could jump a few of men pulled me back into my room.

That day, I realize I don't need to end my life all I have to do is get him back. Because if you love someone, you don't just give up on them easily. The next day I went to both of their apartments, but both of them weren't there anymore. I've searched for them for months and finally I found them.

I was prepared to tell him that I love him and was ready to beg him to go home. I knocked a few times and Todd answered, it's been months and he was still handsome like always.

"Todd I love you with all my life without you I'm nothing and I don't feel safe when I'm not around you. You were my first and hopefully my last. I want to grow old with you and die with you. I want us to have a family. I want to do all the plans we planned out before. I don't want anyone but you. I belong to you and you belong to me not her. I am your happiness and you are to me. You are my everything. Everything I did was all for you. When I found out you want to go to Harvard University, I disobeyed my parents and forced them that I wanted in Harvard University. And-"

"Charlotte, I don't love you. Maybe before even now but my love for Luciana is stronger. I thought you were the one for me, but I realize she's the one for me. Luciana always supported me when you were too busy doing God knows what. She knows me more than anybody. She knows my deepest secrets. Just by seeing her I feel safe. I melt every time I see her smile. It's like my love for her is growing every single day and I can't live without seeing her for a day. I want to see her first in the morning and also the last person I see in the night. I'm sorry, Charlotte but I want to follow my heart and my heart belongs to them. You're just saying you belong to me, but the truth is, there are a plenty of guys who deserves your attention more than I do. You're a great person and you need someone who would loves you fully." I cried and my tears are coming out uncontrollably but when he said 'them' I was a bit confused.

"Them?" I asked him and he sighed.

"I'm happily married to Luciana and we have a daughter whose name is Kate. Luciana and Kate are my happiness and I love them both." He told me and I can hear full honesty in his voice. Just then, I heard the voice of a betrayal. My ex-best friend.

"Honey, who's there?" she called him by the nickname I wanted to call him after we get marry. How could she? She's my best friend. The door open wider and Luciana and a baby wrapped in her arms appeared.

"Charlotte, can I talk to you?" After everything that happened does she expect were still in good terms. However, I nodded and she welcomed me to their house. Todd took you and brought you upstairs.

"I wasn't able to explain to you about-"

"Stealing Todd from me?" I accused her.

"I want you to understand-"

"Understand what?" I snapped at her.

"If you can stop interrupting me then I could tell you" she snapped back. That quickly made me speechless because she was always the quiet and funny girl and never in my entire life did I ever heard her raise her voice to anyone.

"I just don't get why you of all people took him away from me. You were supposed to be my best friend. He was mine first not yours."

"That's not true. Before that day you told me you love him, he asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes because I love him too, I was going to tell you that day, but you were busy. So, the day I was about to tell you that I was madly in love with my neighbor and that he's my boyfriend but you beat me to it. You told me you love him and his the only guy for you. So, the best friend I was I let him go because I want to see my best friend's happiness rather than seeing mine. On that day, I broke up with him and I begged him to ask you out and he did.

I thought I can stop whatever feelings I have for him by dating other guys but it just makes my feelings stronger for him and then I realize he was the one for me and it didn't help when he was showing his feelings for me as well. On the day of your wedding, I wanted to pretend that I'm sick and pass your wedding day because I didn't want to get hurt anymore because seeing you guys together each and every day was bad enough already. I was crying my eyes out when your wedding was starting already. Suddenly, someone was knocking and I was wondering who could that person be? Maybe, it's the landlord because my landlord always wants us to pay an advance but then I was wrong. I was surprised to see Todd. I was confused and was happy because he told me his feelings for me and I told him mine. And when he told me the three words, that's when I decided to be greedy for once. To get what is mine back. We decided to tell you together on the church but before we had the chance you run away already." I didn't say anything back to her. I left.

I was wrong after all these years, I thought I was his first, but I was the second after all. I knew what's best for all of us, and that is for me to go to another country and heal my wounded heart, but it wasn't less than a month when I realize something. I can't do this. I love Todd with all my heart and I want him so badly. I don't want him to not be by my side. If Luciana never existed, I would be his first. But I can't change the past but I can change the future.

I flew back and it was getting late, but I didn't wait for another day, I want to do it now. I knocked to their door house and there standing before my eyes, Luciana.

"You lied to me for years and I never want to listen to anything you say except one thing you said before. You are greedy when you ruined my wedding. I thought I can get over him, but I can't and will never. I want to be greedy too." I hold the gun in front of her. I smiled when I saw her frightened by me and I pulled the trigger. My smile quickly vanished when I saw Todd was the one I shoot. He protected her from getting shot. Luciana and I quickly went to both his sides.

"Luciana, take care of Kate. You guys mean the world to me. I love you" he said while cupping Luciana's face.

"Don't leave me, Todd"

"Tell me the three words I want to hear before I die"

"I love you" she repeated it again and again whilst crying uncontrollably. I cried too, but I was hurt when he said those to her and also because he stole my heart and died without returning it to me. While Luciana was hugging him, I took the chance to pull the trigger.

After murdering them both, I heard a soft cry from another room and I followed it and there you are lying down in your small bed. I pitied you because you had no parents because of me. You were beautiful and I didn't have the heart to kill you. I wanted to keep you, but first I have to bury them so I left your house.

I buried them far away, a place where I thought no one will ever find. I was about to go back to your house when I saw police coming inside. SO, I went back to my apartment and I was called by your grandmother because they saw me dragging your parents' bodies out of your house in the hidden CCTV. And that they will find me so they could arrest me and that's how I never got to keep you.

I've been hiding for months and I was sick of it already. So, I snuck in your grandmother's house and I kidnapped you. I brought a new phone to call your grandmother to drop the charge if she ever wants to see you alive." Truth be told; even if she doesn't drop the charge I will never forgive myself for killing you.

As years passed by, the guilt was eating me alive so I would always drink alcohol to wash away my problems until I become addicted to it. I never intend to hurt you, but every time I see your eyes and your hair, it reminded me of what happened in the past because you have the same eyes as your mother and you got your hair from your dad."

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It's been a month after I found out what happened to my real parents and I asked my grandmother if we can go to New Zealand to have a fresh start there and she gladly agreed. When we first step foot in New Zealand we wasted no time, we quickly went shopping and she suggested for me to have a haircut. So, I did cut it short and I dyed it to blonde.

It's my first day of school, but I still haven't processed everything that happened last year. I was too deep in thought that I didn't realize I bumped into someone, but I didn't apologize neither did I look back to know who it is because I have other things that are more important right now.

Author's note;

Heyyyy!! People in the house woots! woots! I hope you guys like this story of mine and just keep reading. xx